Sex Work
“Assuming the Position” by Rick Whitaker
A onetime hustler takes a long, hard look at the Life.
If you visit the Web site of a gay Washington hustler whose nom de shtup is Fratboy, you can, after checking out near-naked but tasteful pictures of the product, click on a self-interview in which the young entrepreneur explains why he puts out for pay: “College is extremely expensive, not to mention living off campus in one of the most expensive cities in the country. Given the choice of working a service job for $8-$10 an hour versus $150 an hour, it’s a very clear choice for me.”
Fortunately, that blandly pragmatic approach is not the one Rick Whitaker takes in “Assuming the Position,” a touching, brainy and disarmingly frank account of his years as an “escort” in New York City. As he tells it, the precipitating event for his stint on the wild side was being left by a boyfriend, Tom, who had once done some hustling himself. Whitaker’s notion was to shock and hurt his ex while at the same time distracting himself from his pain by taking a role in what he calls “a cultural tragedy.” What’s more (witness Fratboy), there was good money to be made for relatively little work. “Hustling was appealing because it was lucrative,” Whitaker writes, “it was against the law, and it was congruent with what was by then my fairly serious drug habit” — which ran to pot, cocaine and occasional snorts of heroin.
Whitaker hooked up with an agency, carried a beeper, took virtually any business that fell his way and, after his work was done, often went to a bar seeking a freely chosen sexual chaser. During his downtime, he read Nietzsche and Wittgenstein and performed classical music — one entry in the diary he periodically excerpts from begins, “Great dinner with D. last night. I played a Haydn sonata for her …” The detachment with which Whitaker presents this disconnect between his cultural high-mindedness and his carnal crassness — one that most of us feel from time to time but few act out so dramatically — coats his story with a veneer of cool.
Beneath that veneer, however, lies a welter of dissatisfaction. Whitaker argues that the question of whether prostitution is immoral never struck him as “authentic”: “I was not hurting anyone apart from, perhaps, enabling some men to perpetuate an expensive bad habit. And I have never been concerned with the world’s verdict on prostitutes. The world is forever making unfair judgments; people become prostitutes (and do all sorts of things) because life is hard, and life really is hard.” But he admits that in his case hustling took its place among a matrix of addictions, including a craving for affection that stemmed from a love-starved childhood. And the close of one diary entry hints at the toll hustling takes on someone capable of doing justice to a Haydn sonata: “My life is pretty much as inelegant as it could possibly be.”
Whitaker says he liked meeting a variety of men; he hopes that the mental snapshots he took of their apartments and lives will stand him in good stead as a writer. But he hated the game many clients insisted on playing: that the transaction was not sex for hire but philanthropy — an older, richer guy helping out a younger, poorer one. In the end the job was emotionally draining: “It was hard to be relied upon by so many different people, if only for an hour, in an emotional, intimate way, especially by regular clients …” This ennui contrasts with the perennial freshness of an intriguing minor character in the memoir, Francisco, a veteran hustler who knew how to ply his trade without becoming jaded. “Francisco was somehow able to think of his clients as people,” Whitaker writes, “whereas I inevitably thought of them as examples of something like waywardness.”
Whitaker has quit the life, he tells us, and mastered most of his other addictions as well. What ultimately bothered him about prostitution was its numbing effect on him. The only way he could endure it was to close himself off to feeling and, worse, to reflecting upon what he was doing: “Thoughtlessness is the crime, or the sin, that comes before all others, and hustling requires it.”
What we have in this little book, then, are not just the confessions of an unhappy hooker but the musings of a philosopher of carnality. “Assuming the Position” will tell you everything you ever wanted to know about selling the body and will satisfy your nostalgie de la boue in a very muddy way. But it will also stimulate your soul.
Dennis Drabelle is a contributing editor at the Washington Post Book World. More Dennis Drabelle.
Taxing strip clubs for rape
Politicians are holding adult entertainment venues responsible for funding sexual assault services
(Credit: iStockphoto/wragg) It used to be that strip clubs were merely blamed for society’s ills. Now they’re actually being charged for it.
In recent years, measures have been introduced in Georgia, Pennsylvania, Texas, Illinois and, most recently, California to apply special taxes to strip clubs — specifically to fund sexual assault services. Now, even if you aren’t inclined to view erotic entertainment as the source of all evil, this might seem an appropriate aim — who wants to argue against additional support for rape survivors? It would seem even more so when you consider politicians’ and activists’ repeated claims of solid scientific evidence showing a link between strip clubs — specifically those that sell alcohol — and sexual violence.
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Tracy Clark-Flory is a staff writer at Salon. Follow @tracyclarkflory on Twitter. More Tracy Clark-Flory.
The politicization of the Secret Service scandal
What was once one of the right's favorite government agencies becomes a symbol of waste and moral degradation
President Obama, surrounded by members of the Secret Service, upon his arrival in San Diego, Sept. 26, 2011. (Credit: AP/Pablo Martinez Monsivais) It’s hard to work up much outrage about the Secret Service prostitution scandal, in which 11 members of the president’s elite protective service and various military personnel were found to have picked up escorts in Colombia, where they were doing advance work for the president’s visit. I guess it is probably not a good idea for the people in charge of protecting the president to leave themselves vulnerable to sexual blackmail, but on the other hand we do not live in a John Le Carré novel or “24″ episode, and I don’t think the threat of a honey-trap assassination conspiracy plot is very credible. If members of the Secret Service want to get drunk and hire escorts after work, that is their business. (As Melissa Gira Grant says, the only actual scandal here — and the reason this became an international incident — is that all these guys tried to bilk one of the women out of the money she was owed.)
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Alex Pareene writes about politics for Salon and is the author of "The Rude Guide to Mitt." Email him at apareene@salon.com and follow him on Twitter @pareene More Alex Pareene.
My favorite john: My very own “Pretty Woman”
Hector was a handsome Argentine. I was the male escort he hired. What happened next surprised us both
(Credit: ArrowStudio, LLC via Shutterstock) When people learn that I’m a gay male escort, they invariably ask me how much my life is like the movie “Pretty Woman.”
“It’s more like ‘Daddy Day Care,’” I usually quip. And while that’s meant to be a joke, there’s also some truth to it. I spend a good amount of my work time offering support and advice to men in their 30s and 40s who are just coming out of the closet. Surprised? I was too, at first. But then I thought, where else are these guys going to catch up on two decades of sexual and social experience? Until someone comes out with “Gay for Dummies,” the next best thing is a trained professional.
Continue Reading CloseRusty McMann is the professional name of a working call bear. More Rusty McMann.
Ontario legalizes brothels
In an effort to protect prostitutes, the Canadian province's top court strikes down some restrictions on sex work
Sex workers listen to a presentation at the 16th International AIDS conference in Toronto (Credit: Reuters/JP Moczulski) Ontario’s top court has legalized brothels in the Canadian province, a ruling that is meant to protect the safety of sex workers.
The landmark decision taken Monday, decided that the dangerous work of prostitution could be made more safe if it occurred under one roof with security staff, reported the Globe and Mail.
“Are you on the cover of a magazine?”
During a trip to the bookstore, my mom wandered into the gay section -- and saw my face
(Credit: Unzipped.net) I’ve lived in San Francisco for 18 years, and I’ve always been around porn. For a long time, I worked behind the scenes, at a couple of companies’ websites and stuff like that, but I had never wanted to do porn because I wasn’t secure with the way I looked or I had a boyfriend who was against it. Around 2009, those weren’t problems anymore. I got approached to do some nude photo shoots, and one of them ended up being picked up by Men Magazine, which at that time was kind of a big thing. At the same time, a friend of mine was directing a video that he wanted me to be in. At first I just wanted to be an extra, and then he was like, “Why not just have sex in it?” And so I did. Then another director found out about me, and then another, and then I was scheduled in four videos in pretty much the same time.
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