SALON

Friday, Feb 4, 2000 5:00 PM UTC

Stressed sailor, bored waitress bare all

Sailor dances in his birthday suit at Aussie football match. English waitress brightens up bowls championship in the buff.

By

Topics: Charles Darwin,

Feb. 4, 2000

Streaking stark naked with one’s pubic zone in full public view is a fad that began in the early ’70s, when bellbottom corduroys and macrami were the rage. Cultural quirks usually fly swiftly out of style, but baring it all in front of startled multitudes seems to be a trend with long legs,
particularly in Anglo nations.

Australian sailor Peter Hassall, 29, danced in his birthday suit before 14,000 spectators during a football match in Darwin between the Essendon Bombers and the West Coast Eagles, the Australian AP reported.

The petty officer was on leave after a stressful 40-day tour in East Timor aboard the HMAS Newcastle. After boozing with buddies all afternoon, Hassall accepted a dare to gyrate buck naked on the green playing field in nothing but his Nikes.

Police escorted him out of the arena to Darwin’s courthouse, where he pleaded guilty to an indecent behavior charge that cost him $400. Magistrate Daniel Trigg grumbled, “I get a bit concerned when I see members of the armed forces behave in this manner. I’m a bit concerned about their maturity levels.”

Female streakers are apparently more appreciated at sporting events, especially pretty ones like Tracy Sergeant, 22. The waitress strolled nude in front
of 500 cheering spectators at the World Indoor Bowls Singles Championship in Hopton, Norfolk, according to the Times of London. Bowls, a game similar to bocci ball, is usually spared the type of raucous behavior reserved for football.

That was before Titillating Tracy. During the game she bounced up to champion David Gourlay and his opponent Les Saunders and planted a kiss on each. Later she explained, “Bowls has a reputation as a boring game and I wanted to liven it up.”

Was the fleeced femme punished like the poor Aussie sailor? No. Quite the opposite. Tracy made sympathetic headlines across the United Kingdom. Norfolk officials told the Glasgow Herald no charges would be filed.

Issuing a tongue-in-cheek statement, they said, “After having studied the whole unsavory incident on 43 occasions, including slow motion replay, we have decided against implementing a rule that spectators should remain clothed at all times.”

Hank Hyena is a former columnist for SF Gate, and a frequent contributor to Salon. More Hank Hyena.

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