Paula keeps her pants on

She thought her publicist was talking to Penthouse about doing an article, OK? Plus: Christina and Britney, best friends 4ever! Sort of.

Topics: Celebrity, Britney Spears,

Paula Jones is apparently the one
person on Earth who sincerely believes
people read Penthouse for the articles.

A source close to Ms. Won’t-Kiss-It
tells me that Jones had no idea her
publicist, David Hans Schmidt,
was negotiating the terms of a nekkid spread on her
behalf.

“She just hired him to get her some
press,” the source told me. “She thought
he was talking to them about running an
article about her.”

In Penthouse? Come on!

“The remarkable thing about Paula is
that, even after all she’s been through,
she’s still naive,” the source contends.
“She lost the hair bow and the nose, but
she’s still the same small-town girl.
And she still tends to trust the wrong
people.”

So does this mean that, this time,
Guccione’s people are out of luck on the
nude Paula front?

“Absolutely,” the source insists. “She
won’t do it. It won’t happen.”

Hmmm … why am I not completely
convinced?

- – - – - – - – - – - -

Cybill
liberties

“These days I am sleeping alone.
Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the
night, put on my blue eye shadow and try
to learn country dancing in front of the
TV.”

Cybill Shepherd, revealing
that she’s even more perverse as a solo act
than she was during her numerous
affairs.

- – - – - – - – - – - -

Christina to Britney: I turn to you

Note to Britney Spears: Christina
Aguilera
is waiting for your call.

“I have not been able to talk to Britney
at length since we were best friends on
the Mickey Mouse Club,” Aguilera
recently told the Canadian Web site JAM!
Music.
“I miss her a lot. I think
she’s a really sweet girl who’s really
talented. When we cross paths we
definitely say, ‘Hey.’”

The Grammy winner says she recently had
a shared makeup person pass her phone
number along to her old buddy. “We’ll
see if she calls,” she said.

- – - – - – - – - – - -

What’s
beyond “The Full Monty”? Nada

“I’ve got to have an idea but I don’t
know what to do with these men. They’ve
taken their clothes off and I don’t know
what to do next.”

Simon Beaufoy, who wrote “The
Full Monty,”
on why he hasn’t been able
to come up with a sequel to the film, on
U.K. TV.

- – - – - – - – - – - -

A nose
for comedy

Thanks to Tracey Ullman, Woody
Allen’s
hip to a few new feminine
beauty secrets.

For her role in Allen’s new flick,
“Small Time Crooks,” Ullman says the
famously neurotic director “would let me
confer with him on stuff.”

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Like what? Well, for one thing, she
tells Fashion Wire Daily’s
Juice Bar, “I think that he was a bit
surprised when I came out with a Biore
strip on my nose.”

“Woody had no idea what it was, but I
said, ‘Now Woody, trust me. Every woman
in America knows what these things
are.’”

Allen wondered what the white strip did.
“I said, ‘It pulls blackheads out,’”
Ullman recalls. “He said, ‘Oh, that’s
gross!’”

Good thing she didn’t tell him about Brazilian bikini waxing.

- – - – - – - – - – - -

Juicy
bits

Don’t pack up your wand and your owl
just yet. The Hogwarts Express has been
delayed. According to the Hollywood
Reporter, the release of the big-screen
adaptation of J.K. Rowling’s
“Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone”
has been pushed back from summer 2001 to
November of that year. The delay is
being attributed to the production’s
slow start and time needed for special
effects. And no, they can’t just do it
with magic.

Ingmar Bergman, suicidal? His
former lover and longtime friend Liv
Ullmann
says it ain’t so, despite
what the director himself said in a
recent Swedish TV interview. “I don’t
like that interview — and it is not
true,” the actress told the Toronto Sun.
In fact, she maintains, he’s happily at
work on his next film. “That is more
important than saying stupidly in a
television interview that ‘I want to
take my life!’ A creative person doesn’t
say that. Maybe a creative person thinks
that, but he doesn’t share it with
millions of people.” Or maybe a creative
person shares it with millions of
people, but doesn’t think it.

No, you don’t have to call him the
artist formerly known as an
unpronounceable squiggly symbol. Just
call him Prince. “I will now go
back to using my name, instead of the
symbol I have adopted as a means to free
myself from all undesirable
relationships,” Prince told reporters at
a press conference this week. The pop
star says he has no intention of
changing his name again — that he only
did so to escape a long-term contract
with Warner Brothers — and that he’s
“in a really great mood right now.”
Next month he’s gonna party like it’s 1999.

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