Love for sale on the rocks

Marla and Posh hock love tokens; frosh director visits Buck Palace, sneaks toke. Plus: Tonya Harding strikes again!

Topics: Celebrity, Jennifer Aniston, The View, Donald Trump,

Got a spare couple of hundred thousand bucks lying around and a hankering for some used celebrity jewelry? You may be in for some tough decisions.

You could place a bid on the crown Posh Spice wore at her lavish wedding last year. The chunky headpiece, encrusted with 230 diamonds and valued at almost $200,000, will be auctioned off for charity on the Web site this week, as will a replica of Kate Winslet’s “Titanic” necklace and the glittery accessories Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt wore to this year’s Oscars.

But wait, before you shoot your wad, you may want to spare a few shekels for another sparkly item of dubious provenance: Marla Maples’ engagement ring.

The ex-Mrs. Donald Trump is fixing to sell the Harry Winston-designed bauble — which features a 7.45-carat emerald-cut diamond and 16 graduated, straight baguette-cut diamonds — at auction on June 2. Detroit auctioneer Joseph DuMouchelle told the New York Post he expected the ring to go for between $100,000 and $150,000.

Her erstwhile hubby is offended. “It seems pretty tacky to me,” Trump told the Post. “It’s really ridiculous.”

And he knows from tacky …

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Oldsters will be boys

“The Backstreet Boys and ‘N Sync are like 40. First of all, they’re not boys. Second of all, they’re not a band. They should call themselves Man Group.”

– Fourteen-year-old Zac Hanson, of Hanson, on how, like, totally old his fellow boy bands are, in the upcoming Us Weekly

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What was he on?

The next time you’re invited to Buckingham Palace to meet the queen, feel free to toke up. But whatever you do, keep your meaty paws off Her Majesty.

Justin Kerrigan, rookie director of Miramax’s new British comedy, “Human Traffic,” learned that lesson the hard way during a recent royal reception for London filmmakers.

“When I got to Buckingham Palace, I really craved the joint I had in my pocket,” Kerrigan recently told gossipist Baird Jones. “I looked everywhere for a secluded spot, but there were like a thousand police on the greens and outer halls.”

Kerrigan found what looked like a back hallway and lit up. “Just when I had finished, the door opened and who should walk out but the queen herself followed by a very concerned looking posse of around 20 people.”

Kerrigan says he greeted Her Majesty warmly, but that she “seemed to be sniffing the air” as he hawked his film. Seconds later, the queens’ heavies gave him the bum rush right off the royal grounds.

The young director stammered an apology, but was informed by the guards that he “wasn’t being thrown out for smoking pot, but because I had shaken the queen’s hand, which was the ultimate sin.”

Royally harsh toke.

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Full of Spice

“Maybe I’m not going to be Meryl Streep, but I think I can do something honest and that the audience will leave the cinema feeling filled up.”

– Former Spice Girl Geri Halliwell on her modest ambitions for her new film “Therapy”

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Juicy bits

Who wants to be Regis Philbin’s sidekick? Florence Henderson does. Badly. The “Later Today” co-host tells the New York Post that she’d fill Kathie Lee Gifford’s pumps much better than Lisa Ling of “The View,” who’s rumored to be a front-runner. “Yes, I think I’d be better than Lisa Ling. I don’t think they should bring in someone too young because it makes Regis look really old,” she says. What about Cybill Shepherd’s bid for Gifford’s chair? “Regis is a tough curmudgeon. I’m just the opposite and I’m funny,” Henderson told the tabloid. “Plus I didn’t sleep around like Cybill Shepherd.” Whoa there, Mrs. Brady!

Welcome to the Hotel California Grill? It could be heaven or it could be hell, but if the Eagles have their way, it’ll have a different name. The rock group that brought the world the hit song “Hotel California” in 1976 is suing a Dallas restaurateur for allegedly violating its trademark. “This is a restaurant, not a song,” contends Hotel California Grill owner Bill Arnold. “We’re not infringing on the rights of Don Henley, Glenn Frey or anyone.” Plus, they can eat there any time they like …

Looks like “Rocky VI” has been KO’ed. According to the BBC, Sylvester Stallone now says he’s too old to play the Italian Stallion. What’s more, he’s reportedly having a hard time coming up with a suitable script. “Sly has the desire,” said Irwin Winkler, who produced all the Rocky films, “but he does not have the idea.” Funny, that never stopped him before.

Does David Hasselhoff want to touch Dieter’s monkey? Mr. Baywatch has signed on to play himself in Mike Myers’ “Dieter,” a big-screen take on the SNL sketch “Sprockets.” According to the Hollywood Reporter, the movie plot is propelled by Hasselhoff’s jealousy that Dieter’s avant-garde gab show is more popular than “Baywatch.” Yeah, but who’d prevail in a swimsuit competition?

The truth is in David Duchovny’s wallet. The actor will reportedly pocket upward of $20 million to return to “The X-Files” for another season. “I am pleased we were able to come to an agreement that enables me to remain part of the X-Files,” Duchovny announced. I’ll bet he is.

The consequence for punching out your boyfriend and hurling a hubcap at his head? Three days in jail. That’s what Tonya Harding was sentenced to on Thursday. The figure-skating bad girl pleaded guilty to disorderly conduct and malicious mischief, but claimed she’d struck out at Darren Silver in February in self-defense. Well, at least this time she did the dirty work herself.

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