Riot police break up Maxim party

Carmen Electra and others, like, don't know what the big deal was; Hunter "Eagle Eyes" Thompson doesn't quite shoot his mouth off. Plus: Madonna's baby arrives in good health, mercifully far from those brutish English hospitals.

Topics: Celebrity,

Just how crazy did things get at the Maxim Motel party in L.A. last week?

Well, let’s just say that Carmen Electra, Dylan McDermott, Kirsten Dunst, David Schwimmer, Marilyn Manson, Melissa Joan Hart, Beck and the rest of the guests who showed up for the fete at the Farmer’s Daughter Hotel Thursday night were startled mid-jiggle by police in riot gear, a fire department task force and helicopters circling overhead.

“The weird thing is it was really calm inside,” says a spokesman for the magazine, refuting reports that fisticuffs broke out between a member of the Cult (which was performing) and a Maxim staffer. “Brad Rowe was jamming up a storm with the female dwarf Kiss impersonators. Matthew McConaughey was holding court at the bar. People were just having fun.”

But the throngs outside, tipped off to the party’s locale by a local radio station, were clogging the streets and interrupting traffic, and so the fire marshal pulled the party plug just two hours into the festivities.

“I think it was a pre-convention exercise for the riot police,” said the spokesman. “They just wanted to prove they’re not taking any shit from anyone.”

Not even from the likes of Carmen Electra.

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The money cups

“I don’t plan on losing any weight. I don’t want to lose my ample figure.”

– Plus-size poster girl Anna Nicole Smith on the ample figure that will likely have netted her an ample figure (her late husband’s millions), in the Scottish Daily Record.

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The bear truth

Guess what? Hunter S. Thompson is glad he shot his assistant a couple of weeks back.

After all, it could have been a lot worse if his friendly fire (aimed at a bear) found a less friendly recipient.

“Imagine if it were some bicyclist out here, coming around the corner on a bike, and he’d taken the two pellets in the arm and the leg. Wow,” Thompson tells issuepaper.com, presumably marveling at the lawsuit that might have been.



As it is, he says, in his first public comments on the strange shooting, the accident was no big deal. “It was a ricochet. I was shooting at a bear right there in front of our front door. She happened to open it. She was hit by just two tiny pellets.” The wound on her arm, the Web site reports, looks something like a small pimple.

But if Thompson’s assistant, Deborah Fuller, is not bitter about taking Thompson’s shrapnel (“It was really nothing at all,” she insists), Thompson himself displays equal equanimity about the incident’s ricochet in the press.

“I don’t blame the media [for making a story out of it],” he says. “People have been waiting for me to shoot someone for a long time.”

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Models these days …

“The girls now, they don’t have personalities … there’s this monotone look.”

Naomi Campbell, bemoaning the way supermodels these days are so much less dynamic than, say, Christy Turlington, Claudia Schiffer and, um, Campbell herself.

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A two-bit photo spread

Too bad Playboy puts out only 12 issues a year. Judging by the long line of celebs clamoring for their naked moments in the sun, Hef’s people could not only stop paying their subjects — they could start auctioning off starkers spots to the highest bidders.

Or they could start doubling up and shoot two, two, two nekkid celebrities at once. And in fact, they may already be putting that economical plan into action.

According to the U.K. Sun, Posh Spice and her soccer-star husband David Beckham are entertaining a $300,000 offer to pose together au naturel for the thinking man’s skin mag. (Territory mapped out a decade ago by Melanie Griffith and Don Johnson.)

“Victoria and David are taking the offer very seriously and are really flattered,” a “pal” of the couple told the tabloid. “But it’s important to Victoria that she has full control. Playboy said they could cover their bits however they liked.”

Bits!

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Juicy bits

Was Madonna being prescient when, just a day before birthing her second child, she declared that she planned to have her baby in the U.S. because she considered hospitals in the U.K., where she lives, to be “old and Victorian” and less capable of dealing with complications? “I like efficiency,” said the Maternal Girl, efficiently pissing off an entire nation. But, as it turns out, just hours after her announcement, Madonna was rushed to a (presumably non-Victorian) U.S. hospital with abdominal pains and blood loss — and doctors, discovering that little Rocco had a detached placenta, efficiently delivered the baby boy three weeks early by emergency Caesarean, according to the BBC. “She is safe, as is little Rocco,” Madonna’s spokeswoman, Liz Rosenberg, remarked … efficiently.

And speaking of emergency surgery … Gidget’s going to the emergency room. According to the Hollywood Reporter, Sally Field has signed on for a six-episode stint on “ER” next season. She’ll play the mother of Abby Lockhart (Maura Tierney). “Sally Field was our first thought for this role after we worked out a really big arc for Maura’s character and her mother,” said the show’s executive producer, Jack Orman. They like her. They really like her …

What kind of a girl is Paula Jones? The kind to show up in Los Angeles just as the man she says once asked her to “kiss it” is preparing to deliver his last speech as president to a Democratic convention. The Washington Post reports that Jones is staying at the same hotel as the Maryland delegation. The presidential accuser told the Baltimore Sun she’s in town not for the convention, but for a photo shoot. Whether the shoot is for Penthouse magazine, as has been rumored for months now, she refuses to say. Neither did she say if she’d cover her bits.

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