The naked truth

Paula Jones to give Penthouse readers the presidential treatment; Mel C. gives her fellow Spice Girl a good licking on British TV; Elizabeth Hurley's still talking about her Hugh-free bed.

Topics: Celebrity, Spice Girls,

It looks like Paula Jones is that kind of a girl after all.

The New York Daily News contends that President Clinton’s onetime accuser will doff her duds for Penthouse, as was reported and subsequently denied months ago.

“If it’s true, it’s the worst thing she could have done,” Jones’ former handler Susan Carpenter-McMillan told the paper. “I don’t think anyone will approve of it.”

Including, we suppose, the magazine’s own readers.

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And you thought Hugh was a big crumb …

“Now I can sleep with all the crumbs and dog hair I want.”

Elizabeth Hurley, looking at the bright side of life without Hugh “No dog hair or crumbs in bed” Grant.

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Breast friends

What won’t those Spice Girls do for a little attention?

According to, Gassy Spice Mel C. alarmed spectators at a British TV show when she grabbed Scary Spice Mel B.’s breasts and … licked them.

Mel C. was apparently responding to Mel B.’s invitation to her bandmates to feel her up to prove that her breasts were real, contrary to her popular belief.

And Mel C. wasn’t the only one to oblige. Even Baby Spice was moved to declare, “Mel’s got humongous tits!”

What’s a little mamarius approbitis between friends?

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Tim Meadows: Our hero

“Gawd, no. I really don’t want to inflict him on people every week.”

Tim Meadows on whether he has any plans to spin “The Ladies Man” into a TV series.

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Juicy bits

Cover your ears, Janet Reno. When asked to give the name of the woman he’d most like to be for a day, Richard Gere picked … Madeleine Albright. “The first image that came was the secretary of state,” Gere told Diane Sawyer Tuesday on “Good Morning America.” Why? “I think she’s in the middle of doing really important things right now, and maybe the difficulties she faces being a woman doing those things in essentially an old boy’s club.” Albright’s response: “And I’d like to be him.” An officer and a gentleman … and a cabinet member?

Hang on to your hats, cowboys — Garth Brooks and his wife are looking to graze in separate pastures. True, it’s been only a year since Brooks announced he was ditching his country music career in order to spend more time with his family. But now, he tells Billboard magazine he’s thinking of recording a new album and that “Sandy and I both agree that we need to get divorced.” Just so long as she isn’t leaving him for Chris Gaines

You may think Barry White’s voice is perfect for romance … but White himself doesn’t think so. “I don’t make love to nobody’s music, not least my own,” White told Oxford University students Monday night. “When I hear music in my ears, it attracts me away from what I’m doing.” Oh, baby.

“The devil is an abusive tool used to discipline children,” contends Winona Ryder, who plays a woman possessed by demons in her next film, “Lost Souls.” “Adults find it convenient to blame the devil for things they do.” But although the actress doubts the existence of Satan, she’s now provided definitive proof that there is a God: She’s cutting back on the movies. “From now on, I want to do maybe one movie a year, if even that,” she says. “I feel there is a tendency toward overexposure. I know there are some people I don’t want to see for a while, and I don’t want to become one of those actors myself.” Bless her.

Does Michael Eisner know about this? Geena Davis apparently has no intention of letting her new sitcom or the “Stuart Little” sequel get in the way of her budding career in archery. “I’ll have to see if the Disney lot has any empty soundstages I could run over to and shoot some arrows on,” she tells the Calgary Sun. “I’m sure they’ll be thrilled to accommodate my desire to shoot a weapon on the lot. Maybe just right behind the sets — you know, with the kids.” Thwap. Bullseye!

It’s show time, folks … but not that kind of show time. Jack Nicholson’s reportedly turned down an offer to appear on Bette Midler’s TV show, “Bette.” Midler tells Time magazine she got Nicholson on the phone and said, “C’mon, it’s no big deal. You’ll get in your car, you’ll come down here … It’ll be hilarious.” But — whaddayaknow! — Jack turned her down cold, as did Candice Bergen and Lily Tomlin. And that’s the truth.

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