Not so doggone nice

Daryl Hannah makes newspaper pay for its woofy allegations; White House pizza boy spills the beans on Bush and Clinton. Plus: Bono bears a thug, and Sin

Topics: George W. Bush, Bill Clinton, Celebrity, Bono,

Message to the world: You can’t go around accusing Daryl Hannah of being extra nice to her dog and get away with it.

Hannah has accepted undisclosed libel damages and a heartfelt apology from the London Mirror, after the paper acknowledged running a “false and very embarrassing” article about her.

Last October, in an article headlined “Jittery Daryl Goes Walkies,” the paper alleged that Hannah skipped out on final rehearsals of the West End production of “The Seven-Year Itch” so she could fly home to Los Angeles to celebrate her pet pooch’s birthday. In truth, Hannah was promoting another project, and her absence had been prearranged.

“Through me the defendant offers its sincere apologies to the claimant for the distress and embarrassment caused by this article,” the tabloid’s lawyer Anna Coppola told the London High Court judge presiding over the case. “It entirely accepts that the allegations are false.”

Fine, but has anyone apologized to the dog?

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Crop tops for Deborah?

“I think if you add both their ages together, I’m still older.”

– “Inside Edition” anchor Deborah Norville on whether Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera should be threatened by her decision to release a song and music video.

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Your pie, Mr. President

At least one person is pleased that President Bush is in the White House and Bill Clinton has cleared out: Waheed Awsim, the general manager at the Domino’s Pizza nearest the presidential residence and pizza maker to the political movers and shakers.

Awsim, who says he’s the first person presidents call in moments of crisis, tells Wireless Flash News that Bush tips way better on his green-pepper-laden ‘zas than Clinton ever did on his all-meat pies.

Of course, if Awsim had only thought to flash Clinton a little thong, he might have snagged a really big tip.

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Juicy bits

Some proud papas see future doctors and lawyers when they look at their progeny. What does Bono see when he looks at his newborn son? “He looks like a thug,” the U2 frontman tells the press. “The last one had a kind of poet’s head on him. This guy looks more like a bouncer … he’s a very cool customer.” Or would that be “coo”?

How many roads must a man walk down, before they can call him a Joad? In honor of Bob Dylan‘s 60th birthday on Thursday, a New York collectibles shop is putting Dylan memorabilia up for sale, including the folk hero’s handwritten high school essay on “The Grapes of Wrath” and a 1959 Hibbing (Minn.) High School yearbook signed by the student formerly known as Robert Zimmerman. According to the New York Post, the yearbook’ll set you back $8,000; the essay, $35,000. Sheesh — just imagine what they’d get for his old jockstrap.

Nothing compareth 2 a thtuck tongue. The Scottish Daily Record reports that Sinéad O’Connor has had her tongue pierced. Forget that Latin Tridentine Church “Mother Bernadette Mary” moniker. Now you can just call her Thinéad.

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Miss something? Read yesterday’s Nothing Personal.

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