Ashton Kutcher loves big flippers

And cute little shrimpies, too! J.R. Ewing mocks the fellow Texan in the White House; Kurt and Goldie, still flower children. Plus: Lyle Lovett willing to forgive, forget.

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Ashton Kutcher, foot fetishist?

The “Just Married” star says there’s nothing sexier than a great set of tootsies.

“My girlfriend Brittany Murphy’s feet are perfect,” he boasts to Teen People magazine. “She’s got little feet.”

Not that teensy toes are the only way to go, he’ll have you know.

“That’s not to say that big feet can’t be sexy,” Kutcher contends. “Big feet can be sexy as long as they’re good feet.”

Pedicure, anyone?

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Who shot J.R.’s mouth off?

“J.R. was so smart he always found a way to win without violence … he ruined his enemies financially or socially.”

Larry Hagman on how his oil baron character on “Dallas,” J.R. Ewing, was smarter than President Bush, whom he calls a “sad figure” who is “leading the country towards fascism … [though] he wouldn’t understand the word ‘fascism’ anyway,” in an interview with Germany’s Tagesspiegel newspaper.

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No china for them

Those recent rumors that Goldie Hawn and “Dark Blue” star Kurt Russell may finally be looking to make it official after two decades of unhitched companionship?

“Not true,” Russell tells the Chicago Sun-Times.

“Goldie and I have a relationship that’s remarkable in every single way. We’ve never been tempted to get married, but in essence I’m married,” he says. “I don’t believe in marriage. I don’t need marriage. I guess we’ve just removed ourselves from society in that regard.”

As Russell sees it, “You have to believe more in divorce these days … People don’t get married anymore. They get divorced.”

Not that Hawn’s daughter, Kate Hudson, who’s married to Black Crowe Chris Robinson, has heeded her stepdad’s warnings.

“Of course, we’ve tried to pass the knowledge that you shouldn’t get married on to our children, but failed,” Russell shares. “Honestly, we tell the kids, ‘If marriage is important to you that’s all that matters. Just make sure it means something.’”



And if that doesn’t work, just make sure your divorce means something, I guess.

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Or maybe she’s a bongo fan

“She’s a cool ghost. Maybe me being nude all the time is why we get along.”

Matthew McConaughey on the friendly female specter who haunts his house, on TeenHollywood.com.

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Lyle Lovett and his large heart

Who knows if he’s forgiven Julia Roberts for abruptly ditching out of their marriage lo those many years ago? But Lyle Lovett is ready to bury the hatchet with the bull who charged him and shattered his leg last year.

“I’m really so grateful because it all could have been much, much worse than it was,” Lovett tells the New York Post of the unfortunate farm incident, from which he is still recovering.

Cotton, the bull, meant no harm, the tufty-haired singer insists. “I want to say [the bull] is not a bad character, although I don’t hang out with him. The old guy wasn’t being mean; he was just being territorial.”

And that’s no B.S.

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Miss something? Read Friday’s Nothing Personal.

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