The Fix

James Cameron finds Jesus. How Barbara Walters weathered Rosie vs. Trump. Plus: The naked man in Etheridge's bedroom.

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First Word

Tinseltown madam spills beans? Hollywood madam Jody “Babydol” Gibson was convicted in 2000 of running an international prostitution ring in Los Angeles. In 2002, she was released from prison. Now, completing the cycle, she’s publishing a tell-all book, “Secrets of a Hollywood SuperMadam,” which names a number of her former clients. Among those she claims used her services: Bruce Willis, Sex Pistols guitarist Steve Jones and erstwhile baseball manager Tom Lasorda. From the Willis and Lasorda camps, the requisite denial. (Jones, for his part, thinks he may have “crossed paths” with Gibson.) But Willis’ lawyer says, “The story is a complete fabrication,” adding that his client has “never even spoken to” Gibson. (Los Angeles Times)

Cameron’s search for Jesus: During a press conference at the New York Public Library yesterday, James Cameron announced his already much ballyhooed documentary that purports to have uncovered the final resting place of Jesus, Mary Magdalene, and possibly their son, Judah. “The Lost Tomb of Jesus” may sound like the title for an adventure blockbuster, but Cameron is dead serious — he told the “Today” show that the DNA evidence he has collected on the bodies in the tombs was calculated by statisticians to be “in the range of a couple of million to one in favor of it being” the real Jesus and Mary Magdalene. Naturally, scholars and the clergy are a bit skeptical about the director’s claims. “They just want to get money for it,” says Amos Kloner, the first archaeologist to examine the site where Cameron says Jesus was buried. “It was an ordinary middle-class Jerusalem burial cave. The names on the caskets are the most common names found among Jews at the time.” (Reuters, Associated Press)

Final Oscar talk: With all the gossip reporters covering the Oscars ostensibly too hung over to file the goods early yesterday, here’s a summary of the rest of the juice from the night that we couldn’t bring you Monday: Brad Pitt raised eyebrows by not attending the awards show, despite the fact that he was a producer of best-film winner “The Departed”; Eddie Murphy stormed out of the ceremony after losing the prize for best supporting actor to Alan Arkin; British pop singer James Blunt ran over a fan’s (or possibly a paparazzo’s) foot as he drove away from a pre-Oscars party. And good news this morning for Ellen DeGeneres, whose job as host got mixed reviews — the TV broadcast was up by about a million viewers from last year’s, with an average audience of 39.9 million. (Page Six, Fox 411, Star, People, Reuters, Variety)

White noise … Bobby Brown was arrested in Massachusetts on Sunday for failing to pay the child support he owes for the two children he had with former girlfriend Kim Ward — on Monday, a judge ordered that Brown be held in jail until he pays the $19,150 in fees and fines he owes. (People) … It has been five days, but Britney Spears is still in rehab, and a source tells the London Sun she has decided to take over a whole wing at the Promises center in Malibu. (The Scoop) … Add “writer” to Mary-Kate Olsen’s résumé — she got a byline (right) in this weekend’s New York Times T Styles magazine, writing about her love for a Chanel bag. (N.Y. Times) … The day after the Oscars, Helen Mirren was reportedly invited to join Queen Elizabeth II for tea at Buckingham Palace — “We are looking at a number of options,” a palace spokesperson said Monday. (E Online) … British tabloid the Daily Express is reporting that Jennifer Aniston has found a new beau, a cameraman for Courteney Cox’s show, “Dirt,” identified only as Mike. (Ananova)

Talkers

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On Bawbwa: Erstwhile gossip columnist Lloyd Grove has a look at the real loser of the Rosie O’Donnell vs. Donald Trump fracas over Miss USA Tara Conner — Walters herself. Raising the question, “Can a celebrity warhorse survive the age of blabbermouth stardom?” Grove seems unwilling to come right out and answer directly. Trump, however, has no problem doing so: “Barbara’s had a long career, but she’s never had anything like this. She was always supposed to be above the fray. This affair has been traumatic for Barbara because it just looks like it has passed her by. I’ve seen great boxers become old in one night.” Key quote: “‘Barbara has the exterior of a debutante,’ her friend Dan Rather notes, ‘but the heart of an assassin.’” (“Barbara Falters,” New York)

Update

Critic hate: The latest on restaurateur Jeffrey Chodorow’s beef with New York Times critic Frank Bruni over a bad review of his steak restaurant, Kobe House: “Frank Bruni is banned from all my [29] restaurants,” he tells the New York Post. “I’m telling my staff that the first person to recognize Bruni at any of my restaurants will be given a free trip for two to the Caribbean,” and adds he’s posting Bruni’s picture on his new blog. (Page Six)

Buzz Index

Judgment

Oates on Acocella: In a long review of Joan Acocella’s collection of essays, “Twenty-eight Artists and Two Saints,” novelist Joyce Carol Oates sees evidence of “not only intelligence and taste but a more rare talent for self-effacement” in Acocella’s work. Drawn from her writings at the New Yorker and the New York Review of Books, the compilation covers artists and writers like Simone de Beauvoir, Primo Levi, Dorothy Parker, Saul Bellow and Susan Sontag — the saints refer to Mary Magdalene and Joan of Arc. Summarizing the various concerns of Acocella’s that the book illustrates, Oates writes that her “enthusiasm for certain of her subjects makes the reader want to seek out their work immediately, to read and to reread.” (“Brilliance, Silence, Courage,” the New York Review of Books)

“This is the only naked man that will ever be in my bedroom.”

Melissa Etheridge, referring to her Oscar for best song. (People)

Numbers

5,800: The total number of voting members of the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences.
Fewer than 300: The number of those who asked for the special ballot allowing them to vote in the best-documentary category, which Al Gore’s “An Inconvenient Truth” won. (Gatecrasher)

Turn On

On Tuesday it’s the last episode of “Veronica Mars” (the CW, 9 p.m. EST) before the show goes on hiatus, and Jeff Foxworthy hosts a new game show with an all-too-explanatory title, “Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader?” (Fox, 9:30 EST). Elsewhere, PBS presents the third part of its series “News War: What’s Happening to the News” (check local listings) and ABC airs a special report, “To Iraq and Back: Bob Woodruff Reports” (10 p.m. EST).

Talk

SHOW GUESTS
Regis and Kelly (ABC, 9 a.m. EST) Courteney Cox, David Boreanaz, Five for Fighting
The View (ABC, 11 a.m. EST) Jane Seymour, Von Smith, guest co-host Kimberly McCullough
Ellen (Syndicated, check local listings) Unforgettable moments from past seasons
Oprah (Syndicated, check local listings) Bob Woodruff
Larry King (CNN, 9 p.m. EST) Nancy Pelosi
Jon Stewart (Comedy Central, 11 p.m. EST) John Amaechi
Stephen Colbert (Comedy Central, 11:30 p.m. EST) Dr. Craig Venter
David Letterman (CBS, 11:30 p.m. EST) Evangeline Lilly, Jeff MacGregor, bubble blowing guy Tom Noddy
Jay Leno (NBC, 11:35 p.m. EST) John Travolta, Katt Williams, Everclear
Jimmy Kimmel (ABC, 12:05 a.m. EST) Jewel, Steven Wright
Conan O’Brien (NBC, 12:35 a.m. EST) Jake Gyllenhaal, Bayside
Craig Ferguson (CBS, 12:35 a.m. EST) Jill Hennessy, Oliver Hudson, Jim McDonald

 

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Fix contributors: Heather Havrilesky, Scott Lamb, Kerry Lauerman, David Marchese, Laura Miller, Andrew O’Hehir, Amy Reiter, Stephanie Zacharek

Fix logo by Rhonda Rubinstein

Scott Lamb is a senior editor at BuzzFeed.com.

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