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2008 Elections

Tuesday, Nov 27, 2007 9:35 AM UTC2007-11-27T09:35:00Zl, M j, Y g:i A T

You, too, can be a campaign reporter!

Up to speed on Dennis Kucinich's UFO encounters? Know which candidate is Dick Cheney's cousin? Test your '08 savvy here.

You, too, can be a campaign reporter!

We, the campaign press corps, need help. We can’t do it alone. The campaign season is just too long, too exhausting. It has already been a year of diner food and Iowa sunsets, motel room breakfasts and three-hour bus rides at dawn. Our children don’t recognize us. Our husbands and wives won’t look us in the eye. Our boyfriends and girlfriends have moved on.

So you must take this test, the second installment of the ACTAT — Advanced Campaign Trail Aptitude Test. You must score well. Our very democracy depends upon it. If you get a perfect score, you can quit your job and join the circus. We will give up our seats on the bus.* We will join a yoga class, read poetry and talk about our feelings more.

As before, the test is hard. Number a piece of paper 1 to 30. The answers are available on Page 3. If you get every question right, you can have my job.*

*Just kidding.

1. When prompted by a young voter in Exeter, N.H., Rudy Giuliani promised to keep America safe from what obscure threat?

  • A. Unsteady liposuction doctors
  • B. Evil space aliens
  • C. British television remakes
  • D. Fluoridated water
  • E. The Ebola virus
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Michael Scherer is Salon's Washington correspondent. Read his other articles hereMore Michael Scherer

Monday, Dec 19, 2011 10:10 PM UTC2011-12-19T22:10:00Zl, M j, Y g:i A T

Baseless Condi Rice speculation making a comeback

Updated: To celebrate its return, a brief history of this variety of pundit fantasy writing

Condoleezza Rice

Condoleezza Rice  (Credit: Reuters)

[UPDATED BELOW] Joseph Curl, former White House correspondent for the Washington Times, is bringing me back to the good old days of 2006 in his latest opinion column for the conservative paper. It’s a breathless report that Condoleezza Rice will seek the vice presidency, and it’s a classic of the genre.

Any amateur can speculate that Chris Christie will enter the presidential race, or posit a Mike Bloomberg third-party run, or imagine Hillary Clinton launching a primary challenge against Barack Obama. After all, those three have actually won elections and expressed political ambitions. It takes a real pro to decide to build buzz around someone who not only hasn’t ever run for anything, but who’s never expressed a desire to run for anything.

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Alex Pareene

Alex Pareene writes about politics for Salon. Email him at apareene@salon.com and follow him on Twitter @pareene  More Alex Pareene

Monday, Oct 3, 2011 7:25 PM UTC2011-10-03T19:25:00Zl, M j, Y g:i A T

Breitbart shock: Obama was in same place at same time as New Black Panthers

Right-wingers once again try to connect the president to a fringe group of laughable conservative boogeymen

Members of the New Black Panther Party, including, Divine Allah, left, arrive for funeral services for 13-year-old shooting victim, Tamrah Leonard, at the Friendship Baptist Church in Trenton, N.J., Saturday, June 13, 2009.

Members of the New Black Panther Party, including, Divine Allah, left, arrive for funeral services for 13-year-old shooting victim, Tamrah Leonard, at the Friendship Baptist Church in Trenton, N.J., Saturday, June 13, 2009.  (Credit: AP/Mike Derer)

Andrew Breitbart’s loud, dumb BigGovernment site has a loud, dumb story about how Barack Obama “appeared and marched with the New Black Panther Party in 2007.” The occasion was the 42nd anniversary of the march from Selma, Alabama, and in addition to Barack Obama, Hillary Clinton and Al Sharpton were also there, along with dozens of civil rights era luminaries and thousands of other people because it was a massive annual celebration and not actually an Obama campaign event.

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Alex Pareene

Alex Pareene writes about politics for Salon. Email him at apareene@salon.com and follow him on Twitter @pareene  More Alex Pareene

Thursday, Sep 15, 2011 7:55 PM UTC2011-09-15T19:55:00Zl, M j, Y g:i A T

Palins give free publicity to book bashing Palins

Joe McGinniss' "The Rogue" gets a big marketing boost from its subject's classic (and predictable) overreaction

Sarah Palin

Sarah Palin

Here, according to the National Enquirer, are the shocking revelations in Joe McGinniss’ new book about Sarah Palin, “The Rogue”:

  • She has done drugs.
  • She had sex with a basketball player before she married Todd.
  • She is mean and petty.
  • She is a bad mother.
  • She had an affair after she married Todd.

There is also, obviously, some stuff about Trig’s birth, but I have not yet read the book, so I couldn’t tell you how far down the rabbit hole that goes.

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Alex Pareene

Alex Pareene writes about politics for Salon. Email him at apareene@salon.com and follow him on Twitter @pareene  More Alex Pareene

Thursday, Aug 25, 2011 8:15 PM UTC2011-08-25T20:15:00Zl, M j, Y g:i A T

Will “Joe the Plumber” run for Congress?

And if so, how many minutes will it take for him to say something embarrassing to a reporter? Ten?

Will

“Joe the Plumber,” a man named Sam who is not a plumber, may run for Congress. Joe, a briefly famous desperate attempt by the John McCain campaign to paint Barack Obama as an enemy of the working man, is mulling a run against Rep. Marcy Kaptur, D-Ohio, who’s been in the House since 1983. Joe told Yahoo’s “The Ticket” his thoughts on the potential campaign:

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Alex Pareene

Alex Pareene writes about politics for Salon. Email him at apareene@salon.com and follow him on Twitter @pareene  More Alex Pareene

Friday, Aug 19, 2011 9:15 PM UTC2011-08-19T21:15:00Zl, M j, Y g:i A T

Sheriff Joe: Birther?

Arizona's "toughest" lawman tells some kooks that he'll investigate the president's birth certificate

Joe Arpaio

Joe Arpaio

Sheriff Joe Arpaio might be a birther, now. A quasi-birther, at least. WorldNetDaily “broke” the “news” that Arizona’s most civil rights-disregarding lawman “has agreed to examine evidence challenging the validity of Barack Obama’s purported long-form birth certificate in a determination of the president’s eligibility for the 2012 election ballot.” Which certainly sounds like a very good use of the resources of the Maricopa County Sheriff’s Office, right? There is even a picture of Arpaio with Jerome Corsi, author of “Where’s the Birth Certificate,” a book whose title question was answered twice before publication:

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Alex Pareene

Alex Pareene writes about politics for Salon. Email him at apareene@salon.com and follow him on Twitter @pareene  More Alex Pareene

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