2014's fast food atrocities
Burger King's black cheeseburger: Made with squid ink and bamboo charcoal, arguably a symbol of meat's destructive effect on the planet. Only available in Japan.
I’m a fan of quirk. I get a good laugh out of the absurdity of this great world. I’ve been known to buy cowboy booties for my friends’ tots, so I get the whole ironic baby shtick. And yet a new product has elicited a hearty “ugh” from me. Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you … high heels for babies.
“Now baby girls can really kick up their heels — in stilettos fashioned for the crib set,” reads a story in Saturday’s New York Post. These collapsible heels are “selling like wildfire in 22 states and overseas,” according to the piece, and are about to make their New York debut. Nice way to sexualize these girls before they even climb out of their cribs. High-fives, everyone! Let’s hope I can find a magenta bustier onesie and a thong diaper to match!
Sarah Hepola is an editor at Salon.More Sarah Hepola.
Domino's Specialty Chicken: It's like regular pizza, except instead of a crust, there's fried chicken. The company's marketing officer calls it "one of the most creative, innovative menu items we have ever had” -- brain power put to good use.
KFC'S ZINGER DOUBLE DOWN KING: A sandwich made by adding a burger patty to the infamous chicken-instead-of-buns creation can only be described using all caps. NO BUN ALL MEAT. Only available in South Korea.
Taco Bell's Waffle Taco: It took two years for Taco Bell to develop this waffle folded in the shape of a taco, the stand-out star of its new breakfast menu.
Krispy Kreme Triple Cheeseburger: Only attendees at the San Diego County Fair were given the opportunity to taste the official version of this donut-hamburger-heart attack combo. The rest of America has reasonable odds of not dropping dead tomorrow.
Taco Bell's Quesarito: A burrito wrapped in a quesadilla inside an enigma. Quarantined to one store in Oklahoma City.