Football
ESPN just shows the game
The new, football-focused "Monday Night Football" delivers a delightfully sideline-reporter-free evening. And the hideous Raiders.
ESPN made a lot of noise just before the season about how it was going back to basics with “Monday Night Football.” That meant kicking the celebrities out of the booth and focusing on the actual game, with a larger role for Ron Jaworski’s terrific strategic analysis and a much smaller one for the sideline reporters.
Network poobahs told reporters that focus groups in several cities had told ESPN what they wanted to see on ESPN’s football broadcasts. You’d better sit down because this might shock you. It evidently shocked ESPN. Viewers wanted to see the game.
This is one of those good news stories. The season debut of “Monday Night Football,” the Green Bay Packers’ 24-19 home win over the Minnesota Vikings, was a delight. A sideline-reporter-free delight.
“Monday Night Football” had been employing not just one but two sideline reporters, Suzy Kolber and Michelle Tafoya, in its first two years on ESPN. That’s an awful lot of “I talked to So-and-So’s mom this week” reports and two sideline reporters too many, though both Tafoya and Kolber are excellent when they have worthwhile work to do.
I didn’t even realize Tafoya was on hand in Green Bay Monday until she interviewed winning quarterback Aaron Rodgers of the Packers after the game.
One holdover from the old days of trying to dress up the game to appeal to the casual fan is Tony Kornheiser, who on Monday just would not let up on the story line of Rodgers replacing Brett Favre. He identified Rodgers’ every move as Favre-like and attributed every hand-clap in Lambeau Field to Packers fans seeing Favre when they looked at Rodgers.
He’d already been hitting that theme pretty hard when Rodgers threw a nice bomb early in the second quarter, Greg Jennings making a beautiful catch down the middle at the Minnesota 6-yard line for a 56-yard gain.
“That is exactly the kind of pass that Brett Favre would have thrown,” Kornheiser gushed, “and look at the way the crowd responds right now! It’s Aaron Rodgers, and he’s waking the echoes of No. 4 with a play like that.”
Waking the echoes? I don’t know. I’ve been to a lot of football games, some of them before Brett Favre even got to Southern Miss, never mind Green Bay, and I’m pretty sure the home crowd always responds in a favorable manner to a 56-yard pass by the home team to the 6-yard line. Even if the pass wasn’t particularly Favre-like in any way.
To be fair, though, this one really was “exactly the kind of pass that Brett Favre would have thrown.” That is, forward.
A ridiculous number of bad offensive plays and defensive penalties later, Rodgers did make a Favre-like play, avoiding the rush and making an off-balance touchdown throw to Korey Hall. There was a pregnant pause.
“OK, let me state the obvious,” Kornheiser finally said. Somewhere, focus-group members were pounding on their TV screens and shouting, “No!”
“You saw Rodgers on that play almost get hit, make one move, basically falling down, make that kind of play.”
“I know what you’re going to say,” Jaworski offered.
“Well does it? Does it remind you of him at all?” Kornheiser said.
“Yeah,” Jaworski said, “it was Favre-like. Are you happy now?”
“Are all the people in here ecstatic?” Kornheiser continued rhetorically.
“Yeah,” Jaworski said. “The Packers scored. You’ve got to let it go, Tony.”
“And the game is joined at this point,” Kornheiser intoned. “The game is joined. That’s a Favre-like play.”
The game is joined? What? Meanwhile, the guys in the truck, gamely following the new mandate, were offering up replay after replay of the touchdown. Jaworski finally noticed and said, “All right, I’ll go into the football,” and began describing the actual play.
Kornheiser can be an entertaining guy. Love him on “Pardon the Interruption” and on the radio. But ESPN should have swept him off of the “MNF” set along with the sideline reports and the obtrusive graphics. Kornheiser is not “the basics.”
The opening broadcast was actually a double-header, the nightcap a dog of a game featuring a dog of a team, the Oakland Raiders, who got smoked by the Denver Broncos at home, 41-14, a score that didn’t come close to representing how bad the Raiders are, how badly they played and how badly I just insulted the canine species.
Whoever thought the Raiders belonged on national television is in dire need of a long talk with a focus group followed by a career change.
The stink bomb of a game did give announcers Mike Golic and Mike Ditka space to banter a bit. Mike Greenberg had just read a promo for Saturday’s USC-Ohio State game when Golic said, “Think that one’s going to shape the landscape a little bit in college football?”
Ditka: “That could be a Mini Cooper running into a locomotive.”
Golic told a funny story about meeting Ditka, then coaching the Chicago Bears, after Golic’s senior season at Notre Dame but before the 1986 NFL draft. They talked for a while and when they parted, “I kid you not,” Golic said, “his quote to me was, ‘Hey, Mike, good luck in whatever you do.’ I immediately thought, ‘Well, I’m not getting drafted by the Bears.’” He got drafted by the Houston Oilers in the 10th round.
Ditka also noted at one point that fans in Oakland wear more NFL paraphernalia than fans anywhere else. “These have got to be the greatest fans in the world,” he said, “putting up with this.”
Golic did a good job of describing what “this” meant and summing up the home team in one sentence. “Boy,” he said after a particularly egregious 15-yard loss, “they don’t just have two- or three-yard losses, do they?”
King Kaufman is a senior writer for Salon. You can e-mail him at king at salon dot com. Facebook / Twitter / Tumblr More King Kaufman.
Can Tebow find salvation?
Updated: After losing his job in Denver, evangelicals' favorite jock faces an uncertain future in New York.
Tim Tebow (Credit: Reuters/Rick WIlking) [UPDATED BELOW]
You don’t need to be an evangelical Christian to care about the future of Tim Tebow. I’m a lapsed atheist myself. But with the resurrection of quarterback Peyton Manning in Denver, I wonder most about the future of the spiritual scrambler, who led the Broncos to the playoffs last year.
The Broncos signing Manning to replace Tebow is a no-brainer. He may be diminished by age and injury, but he is also the best quarterback of our time, not because he is a brilliant coach’s puppet (Tom Brady) or an on-field, off-field brute (Ben Roethlisberger) but by virtue of a fierce work ethic and a concentrated intelligence that is contagious and inspirational. Whatever is left at age 35 of him will make the Broncos better.
Continue Reading CloseRobert Lipsyte is a former New York Times sports columnist. His new memoir, "An Accidental Sportswriter," has just been published. More Robert Lipsyte.
The Super Bowl is not a job creator
Despite what civic boosters say, hosting the big game provides few long-term benefits
(Credit: AP/Michael Conroy) Roger Goodell, the commissioner of the National Football League, argued on “60 Minutes” last Sunday that the NFL is one professional organization designed to appeal to the economic interests of the little guy: Its revenue-sharing model, he said, gives a fighting chance to squads from Green Bay and Buffalo as well as to those from large media markets like New York, Los Angeles and Boston.
On the eve of the Super Bowl, Goodell was touting the familiar idea that the sport’s biggest game is a boon to economic development. But with the cost of a ticket now averaging $3,982 and 30-second television spots selling for $3.5 million, the Super Bowl can appear to be more an occasion for ostentatious excess than an engine of development.
Continue Reading CloseAlexander Heffner is a freelance journalist whose writing has appeared in the New York Times, Washington Post, and Boston Globe. More Alexander Heffner.
Political lessons from this year’s Super Bowl
From jobs to health care, football's big game illustrates the factors that will dominate the 2012 election
New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady (Credit: AP Photo/Elise Amendola) Most Americans won’t need a justification to watch Sunday’s game, but if you’re a Salon reader you might think, even in passing, that celebrating the holiest day of violence, consumerism and class warfare on your couch is a betrayal of your values or a waste of your time. You might even imagine that it would be better to take a hike, read a book or meditate.
Not this Sunday, buster. It’s an election season. You need to watch this game to fully understand how jobs, religion, leadership and healthcare dominate every American contest.
Continue Reading CloseRobert Lipsyte is a former New York Times sports columnist. His new memoir, "An Accidental Sportswriter," has just been published. More Robert Lipsyte.
Enjoy the game? For the true fan, it’s all about agony
The New York Giants are in the Super Bowl. But for one obsessive, the question is what time to take the Ativan
Ohio State football fans (Credit: AP) “The truth is,” Nick Hornby wrote in “Fever Pitch,” his book about his obsession with Arsenal and British football, “for alarmingly large chunks of an average day, I am a moron.”
That’s a wonderful sentence by one of my favorite writers, but if Hornby is only a moron for only large chunks of the average day, he is doing a lot better than I am. I can honestly report that for the last few months I have been an absolute idiot for all but very small portions of the day.
Continue Reading CloseTed Heller's latest novel, "Pocket Kings," will be published in March. He is also the author of the novels "Slab Rat" and "Funnymen." More Ted Heller.
Small blunders kill Super Bowl dreams
For fans of the 49ers and Ravens, the road to the big game is paved with pain
Kyle Williams loses it Just when it looked like the NFC and AFC championship games were going to last until the Super Bowl, two fatal blunders brought them to an abrupt close. The stunning conclusions to two of the most tense, evenly matched conference championship games in recent memory were a painful reminder that although football is a team game, one miscue by a single player can wipe out thousands of hours of collective blood, sweat and tears.
It will be a sad and lonely night for Baltimore Ravens’ kicker Billy Cundiff, whose shanked chip-shot 32-yarder gave the AFC championship to the New England Patriots. Kickers must have strong mental constitutions: in a sport where bonds between teammates are cemented in blood and pain, they are not always regarded as full-fledged comrades to begin with, and so when they screw up, it’s even harder for them to deal with. The mantra “short memory,” which defensive backs are constantly shouting at each other, applies in spades to kickers. Cundiff could use a tall glass of Milk of Amnesia.
Continue Reading CloseGary Kamiya is a Salon contributing writer. More Gary Kamiya.
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