Want to “improve blood circulation, promote lymphatic drainage and cellular renewal, increase metabolism, burn calories, [get] better sleep and detoxify the body?” It’ll just cost $50, 15 minutes — and a whole hunk of dignity.
It’s called the “Snuggie Sauna,” and frankly, the picture alone made our day here at Broadsheet. Offered so far exclusively at the offices of New York’s Dr. Svetlana Kogan, a healer who is proud to put “Founder of Doctors at Trump Place” on her curriculum vitae, the Snuggie Sauna certainly isn’t the first spa service in history to test the limits of basic human pride (bikini wax, anybody?). Nor does it, in fact, use a real Snuggie ™ to achieve its purported wondrous effects. It is, however, a breakthrough in the field of personal sweat lodge technology, a field that has seen almost no progress since the invention of Vaseline and Saran Wrap combo. So if you’re in the Big Apple and wondering what it’d be like to read a magazine while dressed up like a sandwich, do as the Upper West Siders of Trump Place do. We don’t know if you’ll look good, but you’ll definitely look hot.