Your daily Tiger Woods

A call to Child Protective Services and a wife without a ring

Topics: Tiger Woods, Sex, Love and Sex,

Your daily Tiger WoodsTiger Woods of the U.S. reacts after taking a shot on the 14th hole during the 2009 HSBC Champions golf tournament in Shanghai November 5, 2009. REUTERS/Nir Elias (CHINA SPORT GOLF) (Credit: Reuters)

The Tiger Woods drama can’t be bottomless — or can it? Eventually we’re bound to hit bedrock, but fear not, because that day is surely not this one. By the time you finish reading this sentence, another eight women will have come forward to say they tapped that PGA ass, and a lurid video or voice mail will have been released and reached 8 million hits on YouTube.

Let’s bring it up to speed. We’ve got endorsement dropping! A possible VIP coochie-procuring ring! The inevitable busty cougar angle! The suddenly ironic last interview! And three words: Crazy. Ambien. Sex. 

Truly, it’s like striking tabloid oil. It’s pretty tough to strike oil, however, without getting coated in a slick layer of suffocating goo. And even in this largest of larger-than-life dramas, there are still fragile, mistake-prone human beings. Which is how we got in this whole pickle in the first place.

Yesterday Radar Online reported that Child Protective Services investigated the Woods family regarding possible domestic violence involving a weapon. The site posted an “incident history” from the Florida Department of Children and Families dated Dec. 11. The document lists “units at gate” of the now infamous Windemere address for a “domestic in front of children” situation that ends in “negative contact” (presumably meaning they didn’t get in to talk with the embattled sports star).

You Might Also Like

Fueled by the image of a raging, club-wielding Elin Nordegren, the blogosphere promptly erupted in new speculation that Nordegren “attacked” Woods. But as CBS reported Monday, the state is obliged to investigate any complaints that come in, which means any guesses regarding the welfare of Woods’ 2-year-old-daughter, Sam, and 10-month-old son, Charlie, are highly premature. It is, however, a sobering reminder that in the midst of this ongoing train wreck, there are very young children whose parents are going to have work very, very hard to keep them clean from the taint of their strained relations, two high-profile people whose worlds changed forever on Thanksgiving night. But where do they go from here?

Radar Online says Nordegren’s talking to a divorce lawyer. The Daily News says she’ll stick it out for the kids. Nordegren herself, meanwhile, has been spotted pumping her own gas in Florida without her wedding ring

That’s surely not some random left-it-by-the-soap-dish-while-puttering-in-the-yard thing. If you’ve ever taken off a wedding ring, you know — that symbol your beloved slipped on in front of all your friends and family and the whole world on the alleged happiest day of your life is not so lightly sloughed off. I don’t know anyone who’s ever done it painlessly, and I don’t know anyone who wasn’t making an unmistakable statement when they did so. (Elizabeth Edwards, who’s still married to her famously philandering mate John, made a splash last year when she started making the rounds similarly bare-fingered.)

So while Tiger and manymanymany,  many of his conquests have issued their own statements, Nordegren seems content, for now, to let her finger do the talking. And it speaks volumes.

Mary Elizabeth Williams

Mary Elizabeth Williams is a staff writer for Salon and the author of "Gimme Shelter: My Three Years Searching for the American Dream." Follow her on Twitter: @embeedub.

More Related Stories

Featured Slide Shows

  • Share on Twitter
  • Share on Facebook
  • 1 of 11
  • Close
  • Fullscreen
  • Thumbnails
    Martyna Blaszczyk/National Geographic Traveler Photo Contest

    National Geographic Traveler Photo Contest Entries

    Slide 1

    Pond de l'Archeveche - hundreds thousands of padlocks locked to a bridge by random couples, as a symbol of their eternal love. After another iconic Pont des Arts bridge was cleared of the padlocks in 2010 (as a safety measure), people started to place their love symbols on this one. Today both of the bridges are full of love locks again.

    Anders Andersson/National Geographic Traveler Photo Contest

    National Geographic Traveler Photo Contest Entries

    Slide 2

    A bird's view of tulip fields near Voorhout in the Netherlands, photographed with a drone in April 2015.

    Aashit Desai/National Geographic Traveler Photo Contest

    National Geographic Traveler Photo Contest Entries

    Slide 3

    Angalamman Festival is celebrated every year in a small town called Kaveripattinam in Tamil Nadu. Devotees, numbering in tens of thousands, converge in this town the day after Maha Shivratri to worship the deity Angalamman, meaning 'The Guardian God'. During the festival some of the worshippers paint their faces that personifies Goddess Kali. Other indulge in the ritual of piercing iron rods throughout their cheeks.

    Allan Gichigi/National Geographic Traveler Photo Contest

    National Geographic Traveler Photo Contest Entries

    Slide 4

    Kit Mikai is a natural rock formation about 40m high found in Western Kenya. She goes up the rocks regularly to meditate. Kit Mikai, Kenya

    Chris Ludlow/National Geographic Traveler Photo Contest

    National Geographic Traveler Photo Contest Entries

    Slide 5

    On a weekend trip to buffalo from Toronto we made a pit stop at Niagara Falls on the Canadian side. I took this shot with my nexus 5 smartphone. I was randomly shooting the falls themselves from different viewpoints when I happened to get a pretty lucky and interesting shot of this lone seagull on patrol over the falls. I didn't even realize I had captured it in the shot until I went back through the photos a few days later

    Jassen T./National Geographic Traveler Photo Contest

    National Geographic Traveler Photo Contest Entries

    Slide 6

    Incredibly beautiful and extremely remote. Koehn Lake, Mojave Desert, California. Aerial Image.

    Howard Singleton/National Geographic Traveler Photo Contest

    National Geographic Traveler Photo Contest Entries

    Slide 7

    Lucky timing! The oxpecker was originally sitting on hippo's head. I could see the hippo was going into a huge yawn (threat display?) and the oxpecker had to vacate it's perch. When I snapped the pic, the oxpecker appeared on the verge of being inhaled and was perfectly positioned between the massive gaping jaws of the hippo. The oxpecker also appears to be screeching in terror and back-pedaling to avoid being a snack!

    Abrar Mohsin/National Geographic Traveler Photo Contest

    National Geographic Traveler Photo Contest Entries

    Slide 8

    The Yetis of Nepal - The Aghoris as they are called are marked by colorful body paint and clothes

    Madeline Crowley/National Geographic Traveler Photo Contest

    National Geographic Traveler Photo Contest Entries

    Slide 9

    Taken from a zodiac raft on a painfully cold, rainy day

    Ian Bird/National Geographic Traveler Photo Contest

    National Geographic Traveler Photo Contest Entries

    Slide 10

    This wave is situated right near the CBD of Sydney. Some describe it as the most dangerous wave in Australia, due to it breaking on barnacle covered rocks only a few feet deep and only ten metres from the cliff face. If you fall off you could find yourself in a life and death situation. This photo was taken 300 feet directly above the wave from a helicopter, just as the surfer is pulling into the lip of the barrel.

  • Recent Slide Shows

Comments

0 Comments

Comment Preview

Your name will appear as username ( settings | log out )

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href=""> <b> <em> <strong> <i> <blockquote>