Like little stars.
The Colorado Republican party failed in their effort to get gubernatorial candidate Dan Maes to withdraw from the race. Even in a cycle in which extreme views, conspiracy theories, Bircher tendencies, and general stupidity are all fast becoming normalized by a radical crop of depressingly viable insurgent Republican candidates, Maes is just too inescapably awful for Colorado voters. Plus, the true believers can just vote for immigrant-hater Tom Tancredo, currently mounting a third-party campaign. But how bad is it for Maes?
Maes is polling below 10% in two recent polls. Tancredo is at around 40%, and Democrat John Hickenlooper has a modest lead. Dick Cheney, the most hated Vice President in modern history, never polled below 19%. For any major-party politician to fall below 20% takes, like, extreme sexual deviancy. Or murder. (And oftentimes those won’t even do it.)
As the AP reported last week, if Maes actually does worse than 10% on election day, the GOP will lose its majority party status in Colorado for four years. Which would be funny, but that would also mean that the GOP would be replaced, in Colorado, by the American Constitution Party, which is, honestly, a step in an even crazier direction. (Especially if that monster Tancredo actually pulls out a victory.)
Alex Pareene writes about politics for Salon and is the author of "The Rude Guide to Mitt." Email him at firstname.lastname@example.org and follow him on Twitter @pareeneMore Alex Pareene.
Like little stars.
World's best pie apple. Essential for Tarte Tatin. Has five prominent ribs.
So pretty. So early. So ephemeral. Tastes like strawberry candy (slightly).
My personal fave. Ultra-crisp. Graham cracker flavor. Should be famous. Isn't.
High flavored with notes of blood orange and allspice. Very rare.
Jefferson's favorite. The best all-purpose American apple.
New Hampshire's native son has a grizzled appearance and a strangely addictive curry flavor. Very, very rare.
Makes the best hard cider in America. Soon to be famous.
Freak seedling found in an Oregon field in the '60s has pink flesh and a fragrant strawberry snap. Makes a killer rose cider.
Ben Franklin's favorite. Queen Victoria's favorite. Only apple native to NYC.
Really does taste like pineapple.