SALON

Saturday, Apr 16, 2011 3:01 PM UTC

The weird world of straight-to-DVD Christian film

Distributors are increasingly targeting religious viewers. We look at some of the stranger recent releases

By

Topics: Straight to DVD, Film Salon, Movies,

The weird world of straight-to-DVD Christian filmA still from "KJB: the Book that Changed the World"

The straight-to-DVD marketplace isn’t made up of just zero-budget horror flicks and an endless supply of thrillers starring the ever-tightening face of Val Kilmer. Every month, more and more screeners aimed at the Christian market get left on my doorstep as Lionsgate looks to cater to a potential audience that makes up at least one-third of the U.S. population. Since the beginning of 2011, I’ve received “The Miracle Maker,” an amazing-looking claymation retelling of the story of Christ, complete with a stop-motion crucifixion, as well as a “Veggie Tales” Blu-ray with box art that sent me into a deep state of despair. As it turns out, there’s nothing more depressing than “Veggie Tales” box art.

There are also the Christian documentaries such as “The Case for Christ: The Film” where “atheist-turned-Christian” and former Chicago Tribune reporter Lee Strobel walks around in a trench coat like a pudgy noir gumshoe as he braces “expert witnesses” and uncovers “an avalanche of evidence pointing towards the truth of Christianity.” Since I watched only the trailer for this thing, his investigation into the mysteries of the Bible appears to take him no farther than the faculty clubs of several North American divinity schools. The trailer for Strobel’s follow-up, “The Case for Faith: the Film,” builds false tension through a militaristic score that sounds like it was also used in some later era Van Damme movies. This time, Strobel interrogates megachurch pastor Rick Warren, who likens Our Savior to a love-struck 14-year-old by saying, “When Jesus stretches his hands out on the cross, he was saying I love you this much; I love you so much it hurts.”

When I tore open the bubble mailer containing “KJB: the Book that Changed the World,” I first thought it was a dated espionage thriller set in the Cold War with John Rhys-Davies as an aging master spy. Under closer examination however, I realized that KJB wasn’t the initials of some Soviet intelligence agency, but those of the go-to book for English-speaking Protestants — the King James Bible. This release appeared to be a “Masterpiece Theatre”-like costume-drama for those mainline Protestants who crave the sight of ruffled collars but don’t approve of the wall-to-wall boffing and bloodletting that comes with such Showtime spectacles as “The Tudors” or “The Borgias.” Evidently, the faith-based DVD market of 2011 has evolved beyond “Left Behind” potboilers with Kirk Cameron.

Unfortunately, Rhys-Davies never dons a ruffled collar or pantaloons himself. Instead the thespian who played Gimli the dwarf and Indiana Jones’ Arabic pal wanders through sword fights and historic locations in the role of the all-knowing presenter, as “KJB” is really a documentary with longer than usual reenactments. Making things more modern, Rhys-Davies explains the events surrounding King James I’s 1604 commissioning of the version of the Bible that would bear his name with lots of sports metaphors. An earlier attempt to produce an English translation of the Bible is “kicked into the long grass”; First Earl of Salisbury Robert Cecil has “a ringside seat” for a religious conference; and James’ schooling of the bishops is called a “first round technical knockout.” For his part, Andrew Rothney as the adult King James uses rather salty language as he rails against “papist puke” and tells a Puritan delegate that a lengthy list of demands was “a litany of dullness and stupidity blown out of your buttocks.”

“KJB” also details the last days of Queen Elizabeth (Paola Dionisotti) as well as Guy Fawkes’ (Duncan Rennie) plot to blow up King James and the entire parliament, which should pique the interest of those creepy guys who go around wearing “V for Vendetta” masks. The film is at its best when Rhys-Davies steps into the pulpit and reads, “In the beginning was the word, and the word was with God, and the word was God” (John 1:1). Through his rich baritone, the man who has endured more “Anaconda” sequels than anyone should have to makes the case for the King James Bible as work of English literature on equal footing with Shakespeare. In the end, “KJB” is a solid if low-budgeted docudrama that makes a person miss those more enlightened times back when the History Channel promoted these kinds of productions, before its programming schedule was crowded with ice road truckers, pawn stars and swamp people.

Bob Calhoun is a regular Open Salon blogger and the author of the punk-wrestling memoir, “Beer, Blood and Cornmeal: Seven Years of Incredibly Strange Wrestling.” You can follow him on Twitter.

Bob Calhoun is a California freelance writer who specializes in rock 'n' roll, martial arts and Hollywood stuntmen. More Bob Calhoun.

Next Article

Related Stories

More Related Stories

Featured Slide Shows

The week in 10 pics

close X
  • Share on Twitter
  • Share on Facebook
  • Thumbnails
  • Fullscreen
  • 1 of 11
  • Lisa Montgomery embraces her nephew Thursday after a tornado tore apart her home in Cleburne, Texas. The twister killed six people and destroyed entire swaths of the North Texas town.
    Credit: AP/LM Otero

  • Jack McMahon, the defense attorney for abortion doctor Kermit Gosnell, speaks outside the Criminal Justice Center in Philadelphia Tuesday. His client was convicted of killing three babies in his clinic, and will serve multiple life sentences.
    Credit: AP/Matt Rourke

  • A photo taken Monday captures Vice President Joe Biden's response to a Milwaukee second-grader's innovative proposal to end America's epidemic of gun violence. This guy!
    Credit: AP/Jenny Aicher

  • Sen. Rand Paul, R-Ky., flanked by a grouper-eyed Michele Bachmann, addresses the IRS' admission that it targeted Tea Party groups in advance of the 2012 election. In an op-ed for CNN Thursday, the Kentucky senator slammed the president for his faux outrage.
    Credit: AP/Molly Riley

  • Ousted IRS chief Steven Miller is sworn in on Capitol Hill Friday. Miller testified before the House Ways and Means Committee on the extra scrutiny the agency gave conservative groups applying for tax-exempt status.
    Credit: AP/J. Scott Applewhite

  • Attorney General Eric Holder pauses as he testifies on Capitol Hill before the House Judiciary Committee Wednesday. Holder is under fire, among other things, for the Justice Department's gathering of phone records at the Associated Press.
    Credit: AP/Carolyn Kaster

  • O.J. Simpson sits during an evidentiary hearing at Clark County District Court in Las Vegas, Nev., Thursday. Simpson, who is currently serving a nine-to-33-year sentence in state prison for armed robbery and kidnapping, is using a writ of habeas corpus to seek a new trial.
    Credit: AP/Las Vegas Review-Journal/Jeff Scheid

  • Major Tom to ground control: On Sunday astronaut Chris Hadfield recorded the first music video from space, a cover of David Bowie's "Space Oddity."
    Credit: AP/NASA/Chris Hadfield

  • When it rains it pours. President Barack Obama speaks during a news conference Thursday with Turkish Prime Minister Recep Tayyip Erdogan, inexplicably inspiring an #umbrellagate Twitter meme.
    Credit: AP/Jacquelyn Martin

  • A smoke plume rises high above a road block at the intersection of County A and Ross Road east of Solon Springs, Wis., Tuesday. No injuries were reported, but the the wildfire caused evacuations across northwestern Wisconsin.
    Credit: AP/The Duluth News-Tribune/Clint Austin

  • Recent Slide Shows

  • Share on Twitter
  • Share on Facebook
  • Thumbnails
  • Fullscreen
  • 1 of 11

Related Videos

Comments

 94 Comments

Comment Preview

Your name will appear as username

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href=""> <b> <em> <strong> <i> <blockquote>

follow salon

Most Read

Popular on Reddit

links from salon.com

vote
Journalists file suit against Manning's trial secrecy: Plaintiffs including Glenn Greenwald and Julian Assange demand press, public access to trial and documents
135 points136 points | comment
vote
Report: Nearly a quarter of Americans struggle to afford food
121 points122 points | 12 comments
vote
Kaitlyn Hunt refuses plea offer, will go to court over high school relationship - The 18-year-old rejected a deal that would have labeled her a sex offender and placed her under house arrest
97 points98 points | 82 comments
vote
Kaitlyn Hunt refuses plea offer, will go to court over high school relationship - The 18-year-old rejected a deal that would have labeled her a sex offender and placed her under house arrest
98 points99 points | 23 comments
vote
Ted Cruz against the world - How the Junior Senator is igniting the GOP civil war
71 points72 points | 19 comments

From Around the Web

Presented by Scribol
listener_new_rect The Listener: Chekhov's story mirrors Russia's own

Recommendations