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Wednesday, May 11, 2011 12:01 PM UTC

David Lynch phones it in with dismembered Barbie head commercial

In his new coffee commercial, the "Eraserhead" director can't even be bothered to be vaguely unsettling

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Topics: David Lynch, Advertising, Viral Video, Television,

David Lynch phones it in with dismembered Barbie head commercialDavid Lynch and a special friend want to talk to you about overpriced coffee.

As much as it pains me to say this, David Lynch has been totally phoning it in for the last couple years. Ever since his last feature, “Inland Empire,” David’s just been coasting: doing his lecture circuit about Transcendental Meditation, an occasional art show or music concert, and then updates to his web page. Which is fine! You are no longer a young Eraserhead, David, if you want to go retire to the red room or hang out on a deserted beach while Robert Blake paints his face white and laughs manically behind you, no one is going to say you didn’t earn it. Plus, we have “The Killing” now, so we can finally dust off our ole Laura Palmer Lil’ Autopsy Kits (TM) and give it another go.

All that being said, its completely unacceptable for you to doing such a half-hearted job with these coffee commercials, Mr. Lynch:

Talking in a baby voice to a Barbie head? Is that you’re trying to pass off as deeply disturbing imagery these days? The only person that this upsets is your little sister, and if you do that again mom is going to catch you and you’ll be grounded from going to Dennis Hopper nitrous-huffing birthday party this weekend. (Parents just don’t understand.)

You want to see what kind of commercials David Lynch used to make? How about that Marion Cotillard video for Dior? Or this overseas cigarette commercial?

Now that’s a damn fine commercial. Go back to your room and think about what you’ve done, Mr. Lynch. Don’t make me regret getting those “Twin Peaks” and “Eraserhead” tattoos from college that I would otherwise be very proud of. If it wasn’t for these stupid commercials, I’d be able to look in the mirror every morning and say “I’ve made some really great life choices.”

So fix this. Now. Call up Rebekah Del Rio, a glittery hobo and some chick in red lipstick smoking a long cigarette and have them come down to make this right.

Drew Grant is a staff writer for Salon. Follow her on Twitter at @videodrew. More Drew Grant.

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