My Twitter battle over vaccination
When I wrote about a medical mix-up, it became the shot heard round the Internet
By Mary Elizabeth WilliamsWhen you’ve been engaged in daily, often highly personal journalism for a few years, you can pretty much anticipate the critical responses to your pieces before you’ve even filed them. Thanks, readers, you’re there in my head all the time.
So I knew when I told my editor I wanted to write a piece about my daughter’s recent experience with getting the wrong vaccine at her annual checkup that I’d be in for flak. But I wrote it anyway, because I felt strongly about two key issues of the story. If you’re going in for any procedure, drug or vaccination, take a moment to double-check that the person administering it is giving you what you’re there for. Also, I believe my daughters should have final say in whether or not they receive the HPV vaccine. And flak, indeed, I got.
But even I was surprised this morning when writer Amanda Marcotte took some mighty big umbrage on Twitter, who began by calling piece an “overreaction” and then proceeded to engage in something that looks remarkably like overreacting.
“A single tear shed over this causes everyone else to wonder if you don’t have real problems,” she wrote. “I’m honestly not invested in freaking out on an innocent mistake that resulted in no real problems… I mean, I have real shit to deal with in my life… If that’s the most awful thing you’ve learned at 11, you live in a big time bubble…. I’m sure her mother’s reaction to it had nothing to do with the little girl thinking this was the worst thing ever.”
Author Katha Pollitt also jumped into the fray, calling the story “ridiculous.” Not the review I’d wish for, but all right. But I’d like to correct her assessment that “I just felt this woman was hyperfreakout helicopter parent, infecting her kids with anxiety.”
Let’s go to the story, shall we? Yes, I said I was “deeply unnerved” by an unexpected call in the presence of my children, and that I spoke “tersely” to the doctor. I’d imagine that when the first thing your doctor says, “We gave your child the wrong vaccine” you might react likewise, especially when you know she’s allergic to certain things, like penicillin. She’s already spent half a day in the emergency room this year from a bad antibiotic reaction. Did I yell, cry or browbeat anybody? No. Was I mad? Oh hell yeah. A medical error regarding one’s child is not so instantly shrugged off.
I also mentioned that I’d been mouthing reassurances to my kids during the whole phone call. I went on to describe having a conversation with my daughter about HPV and the vaccine, getting a trusted other doctor’s opinion about what had happened, and then my child’s ultimate decision to proceed with the course of vaccination. In the end, I called the whole thing “a relatively minor scare.”
I also said that my daughter cried. She did. She was mad about the mix-up, and concerned not just about what did happen, but the prospect of what could have gone wrong in such a situation. She didn’t think it was “worst thing that ever happened,” nor does she live in a “big time bubble.” Last year, at age 10, she had to watch her mother go through life-threatening cancer. This year, she lost her grandfather and an uncle. She dealt with it all while enduring the utterly appalling New York City public middle-school admissions process and bidding farewell to the school and friends she’s had since kindergarten. Frankly, she handled it all with more class and grace than most adults I know could muster. And as far as I’m concerned, the kid can cry whenever and wherever she wants, as much as she wants, and over anything she damn well feels like.
I said as much to Pollitt and Marcotte on my own Twitter feed, pointing out that my kids happened to be present to hear the whole conversation, with the doctor and adding “Don’t speculate about the ‘bubble’ we live in, when my concern was letting her make her own choices” because “I believe a girl should have a say in her own optional vaccinations.” I stand by that. I boss my kids around plenty, but in this regard, it’s their bodies and their boundaries. It’s a medical issue and a feminist one.
Despite the fact that my story ended with my daughter deciding to proceed with a vaccination that I clearly stated I endorsed, to prevent a virus I clearly stated has made me endure two medical procedures and ongoing monitoring, Marcotte also informed her followers that the piece “unfortunately lends itself to anti-vaccination hysteria.” She went on, “There is enough unwarranted hysteria over the ‘sex vaccine’… It should be mandatory. Hysteria about sex is why it’s not. Only 11% of girls are getting this life-saving shot… autonomy is just a red herring. The hysteria over the vaccine is about sex. this is a public health crisis & adding hysteria doesn’t help.” Wow, that’s a lot of hysteria. And pssst, Amanda — she who smelled it, dealt it. Also: Choosing vaccinations is not the same as refusing them.
Not all the feedback was negative. My former Salon colleague Kate Harding, however, made the point I’d hoped to express, and in well under 140 characters to boot. “Stunned at how many people in my timeline would have no problem at all w/child getting the wrong vaccine, as long as it’s a good one.” And Angus Johnston said, “I think it’s utterly reasonable for a parent to want to choose when and how she discusses the HPV vaccine with her daughter.”
I’ve admired both Marcotte and Pollitt’s writing in the past and will no doubt continue reading them. And if anybody wants to disagree with what I’ve written, have at it. I do the same to other writers all the time. Look, I’m doing it now! But do us a favor and don’t waste time criticizing what I didn’t say or even implied, or by using hyperbolic speculation. Because when you critique other females using inaccurate words like “hyperfreakout” and “hysteria,” you’re not exactly doing wonders for the case that women can engage in rational conversation about serious issues.
Mary Elizabeth Williams is a staff writer for Salon and the author of "Gimme Shelter: My Three Years Searching for the American Dream." Follow her on Twitter: @embeedub. More Mary Elizabeth Williams.
Related Stories
More Related Stories
-
1 killed in Oklahoma tornado
-
Thousands treated for sexual abuse-related injuries in military
-
Punk, dance music and drugs
-
My open relationship went awry
-
New York's most persecuted subway artist?
-
What's the Eiffel Tower doing in China?
-
Top 5 investigative videos of the week: Nailing a dictator
-
Will you marry me -- once you're done peeing?
-
My crushing student debt
-
Pollution as ancient Chinese art
-
Chimp's blurry pictures to fetch six figures at auction
-
Can playing Dots on your iPhone make you smarter?
-
Print your own gardening accessories
-
The week in 10 pics
-
Temple Grandin on DSM-5: "Sounds like diagnosis by committee"
-
Stop comparing everything to "Girls"!
-
Is killing a fetus murder?
-
New DSM, new debates over ADHD and autism
-
Berlusconi's parties featured women dressed as Obama
-
Should graduation ceremonies be multi-faith?
-
Federal government is letting us eat metal shards, pink slime
Featured Slide Shows
The week in 10 pics
close X- Share on Twitter
- Share on Facebook
- Thumbnails
- Fullscreen
- 1 of 11
- Previous
- Next
-
Lisa Montgomery embraces her nephew Thursday after a tornado tore apart her home in Cleburne, Texas. The twister killed six people and destroyed entire swaths of the North Texas town.
Credit: AP/LM Otero -
Jack McMahon, the defense attorney for abortion doctor Kermit Gosnell, speaks outside the Criminal Justice Center in Philadelphia Tuesday. His client was convicted of killing three babies in his clinic, and will serve multiple life sentences.
Credit: AP/Matt Rourke -
A photo taken Monday captures Vice President Joe Biden's response to a Milwaukee second-grader's innovative proposal to end America's epidemic of gun violence. This guy!
Credit: AP/Jenny Aicher -
Sen. Rand Paul, R-Ky., flanked by a grouper-eyed Michele Bachmann, addresses the IRS' admission that it targeted Tea Party groups in advance of the 2012 election. In an op-ed for CNN Thursday, the Kentucky senator slammed the president for his faux outrage.
Credit: AP/Molly Riley -
Ousted IRS chief Steven Miller is sworn in on Capitol Hill Friday. Miller testified before the House Ways and Means Committee on the extra scrutiny the agency gave conservative groups applying for tax-exempt status.
Credit: AP/J. Scott Applewhite -
Attorney General Eric Holder pauses as he testifies on Capitol Hill before the House Judiciary Committee Wednesday. Holder is under fire, among other things, for the Justice Department's gathering of phone records at the Associated Press.
Credit: AP/Carolyn Kaster -
O.J. Simpson sits during an evidentiary hearing at Clark County District Court in Las Vegas, Nev., Thursday. Simpson, who is currently serving a nine-to-33-year sentence in state prison for armed robbery and kidnapping, is using a writ of habeas corpus to seek a new trial.
Credit: AP/Las Vegas Review-Journal/Jeff Scheid -
Major Tom to ground control: On Sunday astronaut Chris Hadfield recorded the first music video from space, a cover of David Bowie's "Space Oddity."
Credit: AP/NASA/Chris Hadfield -
When it rains it pours. President Barack Obama speaks during a news conference Thursday with Turkish Prime Minister Recep Tayyip Erdogan, inexplicably inspiring an #umbrellagate Twitter meme.
Credit: AP/Jacquelyn Martin -
A smoke plume rises high above a road block at the intersection of County A and Ross Road east of Solon Springs, Wis., Tuesday. No injuries were reported, but the the wildfire caused evacuations across northwestern Wisconsin.
Credit: AP/The Duluth News-Tribune/Clint Austin -
Recent Slide Shows
-
The week in 10 pics
-
The week in 10 pics
-
Mobile Entertainment: 9 Amazing Drive-In Movie Theaters Still Standing
-
The week in 10 pics
-
- Share on Twitter
- Share on Facebook
- Thumbnails
- Fullscreen
- 1 of 11
- Previous
- Next
-
The week in 10 pics
-
Mobile Entertainment: 9 Amazing Drive-In Movie Theaters Still Standing
-
The week in 10 pics
-
The week in 10 pics
-
The week in 10 pics
-
The week in 10 pics
-
Netflix's April Fools' Day categories
-
The week in 10 pics
-
The week in 10 pics
-
The week in 10 pics
-
The week in 10 pics
-
The week in 10 pics
-
Slideshow: Nerd Obama
Related Videos
Most Read
-
Revenge, ego and the corruption of Wikipedia
Andrew Leonard
-
Obstruction will ruin GOP
Jonathan Bernstein
-
We're living in an Ayn Rand economy
Paul Buchheit, AlterNet
-
Jaron Lanier: The Internet destroyed the middle class
Scott Timberg
-
"Jodorowsky's Dune": The sci-fi classic that never was
Andrew O'Hehir
-
Will you marry me -- once you're done peeing?
Tracy Clark-Flory
-
Temple Grandin on DSM-5: "Sounds like diagnosis by committee"
Temple Grandin
-
My open relationship went awry
David Farley
-
The man behind Abercrombie & Fitch
Benoit Denizet-Lewis
-
Stop comparing everything to "Girls"!
Daniel D'Addario
Popular on Reddit
links from salon.com

289 points290 points291 points | 250 comments
From Around the Web
Presented by Scribol
-
Diane Gilman: Baby Boomers: A New Life-Construct -- From "Invisible to Invincible!" -
Susan Gregory Thomas: Why Divorced Boomer Moms Don't Deserve The Bad Rap -
British Nanny Offered An Annual Salary Of $200,000 -
Arianna Huffington: What I Did (and Didn't Do) On My Summer Vacation -
Vivian Diller, Ph.D.: Maybe Happiness Begins At 50




30 Places You'd Rather Be Sitting Right Now
Comments
50 Comments