Brandi Granville's made-for-Twitter wedding is the latest attack on the sanctity of marriage -- by straight people
Way to sell “traditional marriage,” straight people! First, Sinead O’Connor followed up her December wedding in Las Vegas to Barry Herridge with a split just 18 days later. Not to be outdone, just as “Real Housewives of Beverly Hills” star Brandi Glanville tweeted Monday that “I’m married again – suuuuuuck it!,” her new groom, mixed-martial artist Darin Harvey tweeted that he “had a crazy Vegas moment. Getting annulled tomorrow.” Marriage used to be considered a serious commitment. Now, nobody even wants to make it work for 72 days anymore.
The Glanville-Harvey nuptials were clearly never meant to be more than a lighthearted lark, some attention-getting fodder for the Twitter streams. In an interview on the Crooklyn’s Corner blog, Harvey explained that alcohol was “some sort of a factor.” “We were in Vegas, and we wanted to do the classic Vegas thing,” he said. “On the way to the chapel, I’m reading on my iPad, doing a quick Google search on annulments in Nevada.” Because if you can’t have a marriage that lasts as long as a Woot! deal, what’s the point of living in this country anyway?
Glanville, whose marriage to Eddie Cibrian ended in 2010 when he took up with LeAnn Rimes, surely knows the difference between a loving commitment and something you do because you couldn’t get tickets for Cirque du Soleil. And a woman who cheerfully – and constantly — refers to herself as a “hot mess” and ends every tweet with either an exclamation point or a smiley face isn’t someone who takes her own antics seriously. But is “just for fun” really an acceptable excuse for a wedding, especially in a state where same-sex couples still can’t do the same? When did getting married become the go-to stunt, not just for crazy teens or those desperate for a green card, but for 39-year-old moms?
In a Twitter stream that somehow manages to read like it’s slurred, Glanville insists that “Marriage mocks itself, I believe anyone and everyone should be able to get married! Y not me???” Her quasi-husband says much the same on Crooklyn’s Corner, explaining, “People think it sort of mocks marriage. I think marriage mocks marriage, because so much of it’s BS, and people are cheating on each other all the time.”
I can’t vouch for the vows that the Glarveys — as I hope their welcome mat now reads — made a few crazy nights ago in Vegas. I do know that the Graceland chapel includes the extraction of a pledge to be each other’s hunks-a-hunks of burnin’ love, so it’s not all Bible verses and truth pledging at the altar. But what is a hilarious Vegas spree for some — something to be celebrated with a “suuuuuuck it!” — is for others a basic right yet to be won.
It’s not Brandi Glanville’s job to change the world. My God, this is the woman whose explanation for her actions was, “I didnt mean to offend anyone! I beleive everyone shud be able to get married & maybe even embarass themselves in Vegas ;). This yr has been Great for me in many ways! Im gr8ful for all the ppl I met thru RHOBV. Bare w/ me, Im gonna make mistakes, but I always learn from them! Xob.” [sic] Forget the fight for same-sex marriage – what can we do to cure this lady’s spelling? At least she didn’t have the chutzpah to turn her sham into a “fairy tale” television event.
Yet there’s an unmistakable whiff of cynicism — along with the aroma of vodka — within this notion that a wedding is something fun to do that can then be undone. Glanville, “hot mess” though she desperately purports to be, seems to have grasped that even though she has good reason to be skeptical about marriage, not everyone shares her view. Yes, marriages frequently end up as a bad joke. But one person’s joke is still a whole lot of Americans’ dream.
More Related Stories
- Justin Timberlake: I'm a mediocre folk singer!
- Ray Manzarek, founding member of The Doors, dies at 74
- Beware of book blurbs
- Did a Salon excerpt ruin Penn Jillette's chance to win "Celebrity Apprentice"?
- Zach Galifianakis to take formerly homeless woman to "Hangover 3" premiere
- Seth MacFarlane will not host Oscars again
- "SNL's" uncomfortable Garner/Affleck moment
- "Celebrity Apprentice" finale ratings hit a new low
- Worst National Anthem fails
- The truth in Kanye's anti-prison rap
- Stephen Colbert to UVA: "You must always make the path for yourself"
- "Game of Thrones," season 3, episode 8: A salon
- Bieber booed, Miguel falls on fan at Billboard Awards
- "Mad Men" recap: Love, acid and whores. Lots of whores
- Taylor Swift leads Billboard winners
- “Game of Thrones” recap: “We must do our duty”
- "The Unwinding": What's gone wrong with America
- Michael J. Fox wins: The best and worst of the new fall shows
- First look: The Coens' marvelous folk-music odyssey
- New York's most persecuted subway artist?
- James Franco: "I really felt I was in conversation with Faulkner"
Featured Slide Shows
The week in 10 picsclose X
- 1 of 11
Lisa Montgomery embraces her nephew Thursday after a tornado tore apart her home in Cleburne, Texas. The twister killed six people and destroyed entire swaths of the North Texas town.
Credit: AP/LM Otero
Jack McMahon, the defense attorney for abortion doctor Kermit Gosnell, speaks outside the Criminal Justice Center in Philadelphia Tuesday. His client was convicted of killing three babies in his clinic, and will serve multiple life sentences.
Credit: AP/Matt Rourke
A photo taken Monday captures Vice President Joe Biden's response to a Milwaukee second-grader's innovative proposal to end America's epidemic of gun violence. This guy!
Credit: AP/Jenny Aicher
Sen. Rand Paul, R-Ky., flanked by a grouper-eyed Michele Bachmann, addresses the IRS' admission that it targeted Tea Party groups in advance of the 2012 election. In an op-ed for CNN Thursday, the Kentucky senator slammed the president for his faux outrage.
Credit: AP/Molly Riley
Ousted IRS chief Steven Miller is sworn in on Capitol Hill Friday. Miller testified before the House Ways and Means Committee on the extra scrutiny the agency gave conservative groups applying for tax-exempt status.
Credit: AP/J. Scott Applewhite
Attorney General Eric Holder pauses as he testifies on Capitol Hill before the House Judiciary Committee Wednesday. Holder is under fire, among other things, for the Justice Department's gathering of phone records at the Associated Press.
Credit: AP/Carolyn Kaster
O.J. Simpson sits during an evidentiary hearing at Clark County District Court in Las Vegas, Nev., Thursday. Simpson, who is currently serving a nine-to-33-year sentence in state prison for armed robbery and kidnapping, is using a writ of habeas corpus to seek a new trial.
Credit: AP/Las Vegas Review-Journal/Jeff Scheid
Major Tom to ground control: On Sunday astronaut Chris Hadfield recorded the first music video from space, a cover of David Bowie's "Space Oddity."
Credit: AP/NASA/Chris Hadfield
When it rains it pours. President Barack Obama speaks during a news conference Thursday with Turkish Prime Minister Recep Tayyip Erdogan, inexplicably inspiring an #umbrellagate Twitter meme.
Credit: AP/Jacquelyn Martin
A smoke plume rises high above a road block at the intersection of County A and Ross Road east of Solon Springs, Wis., Tuesday. No injuries were reported, but the the wildfire caused evacuations across northwestern Wisconsin.
Credit: AP/The Duluth News-Tribune/Clint Austin
Recent Slide Shows
- 1 of 11