Like little stars.
There is no problem that “30 Rock” boss Jack Donaghy cannot
solve totally dominate. During last night’s series finale, he presented his team with the Six Sigma Wheel of Domination. “It’s a motivational tool I used back at GE,” he said. “And it will be replacing Kabletown’s kitten in spaghetti.”
Donaghy’s plan to dominate includes:
Innovation: Upwards Revenue Stream Dynamics
Synergism: Golf (A), Recapitalized Integration (C), Synergized Mindshare XXXs (D)
Vertical Integration: Leveraged Disintermediation Paradigms (A), Synergized Backward Overflow (B)
Horizontal Integration: Handshakefulness (A), Bladarian Frankles (B)
Diagonal Integration: Correlations
Brand Penetration: Brutality (A), Insight (B)
Diversification: Correlation of Overseas Earning Report (A), Teamwork
Eficationication: Finular Analysis
He later realized he could dominate happiness, too:
Prachi Gupta is an Assistant News Editor for Salon, focusing on pop culture. Follow her on Twitter at @prachigu or email her at firstname.lastname@example.org.More Prachi Gupta.
Like little stars.
World's best pie apple. Essential for Tarte Tatin. Has five prominent ribs.
So pretty. So early. So ephemeral. Tastes like strawberry candy (slightly).
My personal fave. Ultra-crisp. Graham cracker flavor. Should be famous. Isn't.
High flavored with notes of blood orange and allspice. Very rare.
Jefferson's favorite. The best all-purpose American apple.
New Hampshire's native son has a grizzled appearance and a strangely addictive curry flavor. Very, very rare.
Makes the best hard cider in America. Soon to be famous.
Freak seedling found in an Oregon field in the '60s has pink flesh and a fragrant strawberry snap. Makes a killer rose cider.
Ben Franklin's favorite. Queen Victoria's favorite. Only apple native to NYC.
Really does taste like pineapple.