2014's fast food atrocities
Burger King's black cheeseburger: Made with squid ink and bamboo charcoal, arguably a symbol of meat's destructive effect on the planet. Only available in Japan.
In a video posted early this morning laying out a baroque narrative we can’t make heads or tails of, conspiracy broadcaster Alex Jones came dangerously close to espousing a Jewish conspiracy theory, speculating that the two suspects in the Boston Marathon bombing might be Israelis.
Claiming that he had identified the suspect who remains at large, Jones boasted, “the media doesn’t even have this yet. The FBI will probably give it to them in a day.” In fact, the AP and cable news networks identified the two suspects just two or three hours later as Chechen brothers Tamerlan and Dzhokhar Tsarnaev.
But despite supposedly knowing the ID of the suspect, Jones wasn’t above speculating about their nationality. “These guys kind of look like Israelis. I’m not saying Israel is involved in it, we don’t have any evidence of that. It’s just that they kind of look Israeli,” he said while pointing to an image of the suspects on a computer screen. He added that they could be “North African” or “Spanish-Muslims.” He did not speculate they were Chechens.
He also called MIT, where the suspects reportedly killed a police officer, “mind control central.”
Alex Seitz-Wald is Salon's political reporter. Email him at firstname.lastname@example.org, and follow him on Twitter @aseitzwald.More Alex Seitz-Wald.
Domino's Specialty Chicken: It's like regular pizza, except instead of a crust, there's fried chicken. The company's marketing officer calls it "one of the most creative, innovative menu items we have ever had” -- brain power put to good use.
KFC'S ZINGER DOUBLE DOWN KING: A sandwich made by adding a burger patty to the infamous chicken-instead-of-buns creation can only be described using all caps. NO BUN ALL MEAT. Only available in South Korea.
Taco Bell's Waffle Taco: It took two years for Taco Bell to develop this waffle folded in the shape of a taco, the stand-out star of its new breakfast menu.
Krispy Kreme Triple Cheeseburger: Only attendees at the San Diego County Fair were given the opportunity to taste the official version of this donut-hamburger-heart attack combo. The rest of America has reasonable odds of not dropping dead tomorrow.
Taco Bell's Quesarito: A burrito wrapped in a quesadilla inside an enigma. Quarantined to one store in Oklahoma City.