2014's fast food atrocities
Burger King's black cheeseburger: Made with squid ink and bamboo charcoal, arguably a symbol of meat's destructive effect on the planet. Only available in Japan.
According to a report in Politico, Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell all but promised a group of high-end GOP donors that the Republican Party would not repeat the brinksmanship that recently caused a government shutdown and threatened a default on the national debt.
Moreover, the report indicates that McConnell is planning to wage a counter-offensive against the grass-roots conservative organizations that spurred on the shutdown and are now targeting McConnell as a RINO (Republican in name only) deserving of replacement.
“He’s in fighting mode,” one attendee told Politico. “He didn’t get into specifics about what they are doing and how they are going to do it, but McConnell and [Texas Senator John] Cornyn were particularly forceful.” The attendee went on to tell Politico that McConnell had “said everything that needed to be said” when it came to assuaging donors’ fears.
McConnell’s presentation was part of a National Republican Senatorial Campaign Committee fundraiser that more than a dozen Senate Republican lawmakers attended. His comments were seen as an attempt to assuage the worry among many veteran Republicans over the party’s political strategy and how it could impact the 2014 election, according to several present.
McConnell also told attendees that Republicans are ready to challenge the tactics of the party’s anti-establisment wing, unlike the passive approach of the past two election cycles, and said they will fight back against people “who believe words like negotiate and compromise” are a bad thing.
McConnell and Cornyn were very specific about directing their fire at groups like the Senate Conservatives Fund, whom they believe have actively misled donors about what is legislatively achievable in order to raise money off of their frustrations, according to another attendee.
Domino's Specialty Chicken: It's like regular pizza, except instead of a crust, there's fried chicken. The company's marketing officer calls it "one of the most creative, innovative menu items we have ever had” -- brain power put to good use.
KFC'S ZINGER DOUBLE DOWN KING: A sandwich made by adding a burger patty to the infamous chicken-instead-of-buns creation can only be described using all caps. NO BUN ALL MEAT. Only available in South Korea.
Taco Bell's Waffle Taco: It took two years for Taco Bell to develop this waffle folded in the shape of a taco, the stand-out star of its new breakfast menu.
Krispy Kreme Triple Cheeseburger: Only attendees at the San Diego County Fair were given the opportunity to taste the official version of this donut-hamburger-heart attack combo. The rest of America has reasonable odds of not dropping dead tomorrow.
Taco Bell's Quesarito: A burrito wrapped in a quesadilla inside an enigma. Quarantined to one store in Oklahoma City.