Like little stars.
Legendary comic Jerry Seinfeld visited Jimmy Fallon on his second night hosting the “Tonight Show,” which Fallon brought back to their native state after 42 years in Los Angeles. The two comedians, who are both parents, lamented about the trials of modern-day parenting.
“We’re too into it,” Seinfeld told Fallon. “When we were kids, our parents didn’t give a damn about us.”
Seinfeld described the bedtime routine for his children as a “royal car nation jubilee centennial of rinsing and plaque and dental appliances and the stuffed animal semi-circle of emotional support.” “And I’ve got to read eight different moron books,” he added.
“You know what my bedtime story was when we were kids?” asked Seinfeld.
“Darkness!” he exclaimed.
The comedian also performed stand-up commenting on society’s ridiculous reliance upon cellphones, which are filled with not-so-important contacts whose names we scroll through “like a gay French king,” though we rarely use that “juiced-up hard rectangle” for phone calls anymore.
Prachi Gupta is an Assistant News Editor for Salon, focusing on pop culture. Follow her on Twitter at @prachigu or email her at firstname.lastname@example.org.More Prachi Gupta.
Like little stars.
World's best pie apple. Essential for Tarte Tatin. Has five prominent ribs.
So pretty. So early. So ephemeral. Tastes like strawberry candy (slightly).
My personal fave. Ultra-crisp. Graham cracker flavor. Should be famous. Isn't.
High flavored with notes of blood orange and allspice. Very rare.
Jefferson's favorite. The best all-purpose American apple.
New Hampshire's native son has a grizzled appearance and a strangely addictive curry flavor. Very, very rare.
Makes the best hard cider in America. Soon to be famous.
Freak seedling found in an Oregon field in the '60s has pink flesh and a fragrant strawberry snap. Makes a killer rose cider.
Ben Franklin's favorite. Queen Victoria's favorite. Only apple native to NYC.
Really does taste like pineapple.