2014's fast food atrocities
Burger King's black cheeseburger: Made with squid ink and bamboo charcoal, arguably a symbol of meat's destructive effect on the planet. Only available in Japan.
After launching a truly radical program to turn his state into a conservative utopia, Gov. Sam Brownback now finds himself in an unusual position: He’s a Republican politician in blood-red Kansas, and he very well could lose reelection.
Following a relatively poor showing in his party’s primary election (in which nearly a third of voters cast a protest vote against him), Brownback attempted to explain his growing unpopularity by relying on a tried and true method for embattled Republicans everywhere — he blamed Obama.
“I think a big part of it is Barack Obama,” Brownback said, referring to his only securing two-thirds of the primary vote. “[A] lot of people are so irritated at what the president is doing, they want somebody to throw a brick.”
Brownback continued: “I think it’s a lot of deep irritation with the way the president has taken the country, so much so that people are so angry about it they’re just trying to express it somehow.”
Why Kansas voters would be so irrational as to punish Brownback, who in many ways represents everything Obama does not, for the president’s sins, the governor did not say.
Domino's Specialty Chicken: It's like regular pizza, except instead of a crust, there's fried chicken. The company's marketing officer calls it "one of the most creative, innovative menu items we have ever had” -- brain power put to good use.
KFC'S ZINGER DOUBLE DOWN KING: A sandwich made by adding a burger patty to the infamous chicken-instead-of-buns creation can only be described using all caps. NO BUN ALL MEAT. Only available in South Korea.
Taco Bell's Waffle Taco: It took two years for Taco Bell to develop this waffle folded in the shape of a taco, the stand-out star of its new breakfast menu.
Krispy Kreme Triple Cheeseburger: Only attendees at the San Diego County Fair were given the opportunity to taste the official version of this donut-hamburger-heart attack combo. The rest of America has reasonable odds of not dropping dead tomorrow.
Taco Bell's Quesarito: A burrito wrapped in a quesadilla inside an enigma. Quarantined to one store in Oklahoma City.