Pint-sized Canadian Justin Bieber turned 21 yesterday, an event we're sure he celebrated responsibly, perhaps by taking his first sip of alcohol in accordance with U.S. federal law. We're kidding, of course: In his scant two-and-a-bit decades on earth, Bieber has lived harder than most men who lived to a hundred, from vandalism to brawls to DUIs to run-ins with the law on both sides of the 49th parallel. In honor of Bieber's ascent into adulthood, let us reflect on some of the misdemeanors of years past -- and believe us, we had plenty to choose from -- and hope that the next 21 years are a little more peaceful:
- Got spotted sneaking out of a brothel in Brazil while covered in bedsheets
- Had racist remarks he made as a teenager blasted across the internet
- Got arrested for DUI and drag racing in Miami
- Got himself a mugshot (and a cute one at that!)
- Peed in a mop bucket in a club before yelling ‘Fuck Bill Clinton”
- Got charged with vandalism after egging his neighbor’s house
- Starred in a racy photoshoot for Calvin Klein, igniting a fevered debate about the size of his bulge
- Spat off his balcony over a bunch of fans (although he claimed he wasn't spitting on them)
- Desecrated the Argentinian flag
- Found with drugs on his tourbus in Sweden
- Found with drugs on his tourbus in Canada
- Got a Canadian border guard fired for accepting a bribe
- Had a fist fight with Orlando Bloom in Ibiza
- Tried to rob a woman at a batting cage
- Got accused of threats and battery by his neighbor in Calabasas
- Crashed his ATV and then fought the other driver
- Wrote that he 'hoped Anne Frank would have been a Belieber' in the guestbook at the Anne Frank House (not illegal, but certainly tasteless and bizarre)
- Got into a brawl at a Dave & Buster's
- Vandalized a wall in Rio de Janeiro
- Charged with assaulting a Toronto limo driver, although the charges were later dropped
- Started an international incident when his pet monkey was seized at a German airport
Happy birthday, Biebs!
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