"I found out how much less I was being paid than the lucky people with d*cks": Jennifer Lawrence pens blistering essay on wage gap

Lawrence opened up about being paid less than her male costars in a new essay for Lena Dunham's "Lenny" newsletter

Published October 13, 2015 1:43PM (EDT)

 (AP/Jordan Strauss)
(AP/Jordan Strauss)

World, meet your newest addition to the feminist blogosphere: Jennifer Lawrence.

"When it comes to the subject of feminism, I’ve remained ever-so-slightly quiet. I don’t like joining conversations that feel like they’re ‘trending,’” confessed the actress in a funny, pointed new essay for Lena Dunham's "Lenny Letter." But, she acknowledges, "with a lot of talk comes change, so I want to be honest and open and, fingers crossed, not piss anyone off."

In the essay, Lawrence opened up about her experiences with the gender wage gap, which came to the fore when emails from the Sony leak revealed that the actress was receiving less money than her male “American Hustle” costars. But when she found out about the disparity, Lawrence wasn’t mad at Sony — she was mad at herself.

"When the Sony hack happened and I found out how much less I was being paid than the lucky people with dicks, I didn’t get mad at Sony,” she writes. "I got mad at myself. I failed as a negotiator because I gave up early. I didn’t want to keep fighting over millions of dollars that, frankly, due to two franchises, I don’t need. (I told you it wasn’t relatable, don’t hate me)."

“I would be lying if I didn’t say there was an element of wanting to be liked that influenced my decision to close the deal without a real fight,” Lawrence continued. “I didn’t want to seem ‘difficult’ or ‘spoiled.’ At the time, that seemed like a fine idea, until I saw the payroll on the Internet and realized every man I was working with definitely didn’t worry about being ‘difficult’ or ‘spoiled.’”

Admitting that much of her decision to close the deal stems from wanting to be “liked,” Lawrence wonders whether women have been conditioned to be less assertive in the workplace. “Are we socially conditioned to behave this way?” she asks. "We’ve only been able to vote for what, 90 years? I’m seriously asking – my phone is on the counter and I’m on the couch, so a calculator is obviously out of the question. Could there still be a lingering habit of trying to express our opinions in a certain way that doesn’t ‘offend’ or ‘scare’ men?”

Alas, Lawrence — perhaps taking some cues from her new BFF Amy Schumer — says she is done keeping her voice down to appease men.

“I’m over trying to find the ‘adorable’ way to state my opinion and still be likable! F– that,” she concluded. “I don’t think I’ve ever worked for a man in charge who spent time contemplating what angle he should use to have his voice heard. It’s just heard.”

J.Law, as ever, we salute you.

via GIPHY

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