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George W. Bush

Vote for the one who won't beat you up

Trouble deciding which candidate is for you? Cary Tennis makes some suggestions in this election rant.

Cary Tennis has some harrowing words for you swing voters. Your best choice may be the guy who wouldn't trip you in the hallway on your way to class in high school. If you were already having trouble deciding who to vote for, this rant should make the decision just about as clear as mud.

Cary Tennis is Salon's copy chief. He is working on a novel.

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