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Leaving the stage
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July 7, 1999 |
I take a chance one day and venture to the center of the stage, escaping
the confinement of the corner. But the lectern -- the place where I think
I am supposed to be -- draws me back. I am safer behind it. A month goes by. I'm still suffering the dread that begins an hour before class. Today it seems especially acute -- as if my body will rebel and finally realize my greatest fear: to enter class but not to be able to speak at all. By the time I open the door to Alumni 410, my throat is shut and I'm convinced my mouth will follow. I'm wrong; words do come out. But they're not the ones I have planned. "I can't stand it up here. I'm getting off the stage," I say. I move away from
the lectern, walk down the two steps. The class applauds. The course gets better after that. I walk in front of the first row of
chairs and I move up and down the aisle. Students in the back row no
longer read the Daily Tar Heel. Their applause has given me courage. Over the remaining 10 weeks I begin to experiment. Sometimes I stop lecturing altogether. I have the students do some 15-minute exercises in small groups. Occasionally I ask questions any of them can answer, questions about their lives. The interaction warms my joints and I find myself doing a bit of improv, making them laugh. The pre-class dreads have almost dissolved. I ask students to apply concepts to their experiences as students,
friends, daughters and sons, girlfriends and boyfriends, moviegoers,
sports enthusiasts and whatever else they'll share. I ask them
to think about this "education" they're participating in and the model of
teaching that fits most of their classes. One assignment calls for them to write detailed field notes based on five
hours of observation in a social setting. When it's time to show them that
even the physical arrangement of a setting can yield important
information, I use our classroom as an example. I ask them: What does this room tell us about higher education? Silence. | ||
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