Last week, the show bleated that it would offer one of the residents $10,000 to leave, trying to make it seem as if the offer was an exciting new development as opposed to a frank admission of surrender in the face of unmitigated, six-days-a-week boredom. As the week went on, it sidled up to $20,000, and becomes $50,000 on the actual show.

Guess who took it?

At the start of the hour-long show -- hosted by Julie Chen, Intrepid Newswoman -- we see a video montage of Beth, an alternate from the original casting session who didn't make the final cut. Having found Jordan, CBS obviously figured that it needed only one hot, catty chick with something resembling a brain who would steal boyfriends and make the other women jealous.

We learn a bit about Beth from the video. Beth is determined. Beth hates to lose. "I'm opinionated," she says. "And that's sometimes misconstrued as being a bitch."

She's Jordan all right.

She's also got a boyfriend. The two of them ride go-karts, play air-hockey and dance.

"She can be a bit melodramatic," says her sister. "She can be a drama queen."

(Just what "Big Brother" has been missing: drama.)

Most importantly, we see in an unnecessarily long beach-cavorting sequence that Beth has healthy teeth and she can really fill out a bikini. She's going to look great tormenting Josh, Eddie and Curtis by the side of the pool.

In the studio, Beth tells Julie frankly that she's in it for the money, and that she already has her rifle scope set on Jamie (good) and figures that she could be buds with Eddie (bad).

After nominations, we'll find out if Beth will join the Staid Six inside the passive panopticon.

Inside the house all of the hamsters wear sunglasses and camouflage fatigues for the live show. They're telling the producers that they're under fire. That zany George hides under a hat fashioned from a wilted plant. He's pasted four stars across his sleeveless shirt.

"This is not war," wanly protests Julie Chen, who is still standing in that funny way.

On to nominations. Curtis serves up Eddie and George, maintaining his pattern of voting against the men in the house while insisting that he votes without reason.

Josh marks Curtis and Cassandra because they have good jobs in the real world.

Cassandra nominates Eddie and Jamie, explaining that she's voting to toss the two people who do the fewest chores. She's "physically tired" of taking care of the others, she says.

Eddie, wearing a fashionable Abe Lincoln beard, nominates Curtis and Cassandra. He still maintains that he doesn't know why, but he explains that he won't vote for the other three: George needs the money; Josh is his buddy; Jamie is "too sweet and nice." He didn't feel that way last week.

Meanwhile, Miss Too-Sweet-and-Nice's face looks like a round of floured pizza dough when she gets to the Red Room. She's moved beyond her method of voting by dice because "she has reasons this time." Cassandra and Eddie -- they're not playing in the house reindeer games, while the others are "trying to make this experience the best it can be for each other."

Jamie still thinks she's at acting camp.

George, talking in a creepy third person, has developed into some sort of feminist. He's casting votes for Josh and Curtis. "The house has to have women in it," he says, simultaneously cultivating and repelling votes from all those XYs out there on the other end of the 1-900 jury.

Julie Chen, newswoman, reads the votes back to the houseguests: Curtis, Cassandra and Eddie are all up for banishment.

Not 10 minutes into the show, we already have what the producers usually stretch out for an hour. It's not clear if this is supposed to make us feel cheated or impressed. Whatever. Julie's already moving on, because what's coming next is so, so, so exciting.

That's right, it's the live Beth challenge and there is money involved. If one of the shut-ins decides to walk away with a pile of green, he or she can leave tonight. Julie isn't telling them, but the audience knows that in addition, Beth will take the place of the walking guest. The nominations from tonight will also be invalid.

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