I Like to Watch

Origin of the feces
At least now we know that the crack trade is booming during these tough economic times. Just a spoonful of crack certainly makes FX's "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" (10 p.m. Thursdays) go down in the most delightful way -- or at least, it makes the show's writers whistle while they work. How else do you explain a recent episode titled "Who Pooped the Bed?" in which Frank (Danny DeVito) and Charlie (Charlie Day) argue over who's to blame for the excrement found at the center of their shared bed for two mornings in a row?

Yes, Frank and Charlie sleep together on a foldout couch, just the sort of detail that seems perfectly normal to die-hard fans of the show (now in its fourth season) -- and believe me, they're out there. If you were receiving an education at one of the finer universities in this great nation of ours (aka sitting on the couch smoking bong hits all day long), a sitcom about five aggressive, scheming losers who are primarily concerned with making quick cash and/or screwing each other over would be just what the doctor ordered -- along with two extra-large Hawaiian pizzas.

And even though Dennis (Glenn Howerton), Mac (Rob McElhenney), Dee (Kaitlin Olson), Charlie and Frank team up to hunt and kill a homeless man or steal a crack baby or fake their own deaths or pander for the camera just for a taste of YouTube fame, they do it all with so much manic energy, style and flair that the most asinine of plots becomes unpredictable somewhere along the way. After all, these miscreants spend most of their time sitting around in the dive bar they own, swilling beer. I think they've considered killing each other several times now. Really, anything could happen. Will Dee succeed in having a "Sex and the City"-like night out on the town with the girls, even when one of them has a drinking problem and the other opens conversations with hot men by announcing that she's bleached her asshole? Will Mac and Charlie manage to fake their deaths before Mac's meth dealer father can kill them? Even the bed-pooping incident or a simple rivalry between Mac and Dennis over which of them is Charlie's best friend is laden with unpredictable parodies and plot twists galore until the game becomes trying to figure out how it will all be resolved.

But then, maybe it's the ludicrous dialogue that keeps this weird little ship afloat. Take this exchange among Dennis, Dee and Frank when they discover a glory hole in the bathroom at the bar:

Dee: Why would you want to have sex with someone you can't see?"

Dennis: Well, Dee, I think the real question is, why wouldn't you want to have sex with someone you can't see? It's very European. You see, Europe leads the way with sexual exploration. Quite frankly, I think it's time we caught up.

Frank: This sounds hot! I'm gonna go get some duct tape.

Dennis: Oh, now, hold on a second, Frank. Before you go sticking anything through that hole, you might want to consider that on the other side of this wall, more often than not, there's a dude.

Frank: But you can't see through the wall, so how do you know it's not a girl? You know, I could just picture a girl and then ... it's good!

Dennis: Right, well some might find that method effective. But it's a dangerous game you're playing, Frank.

Frank: Suppose the other guy is picturing a girl also!

Dee: How's he gonna do that with a dick in his mouth?

Frank: I don't know. That's his problem.

Now, see, dialogue like that either makes you cringe or makes you chuckle softly in spite of yourself. Yes, there are always genitals and rectums in the mix, and there's always a whiff of homophobia in the air. This is dude humor, after all. And while I may not appreciate a pilot about giving birth to a giant fart, that doesn't mean I can turn my back on earnest enthusiasm surrounding a glory hole. I'm only human.

None of the screechy goings-on of "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" really matter, of course. Do we care if the waitress Charlie's had a crush on for years ever gives him the time of day? Do we care if Dennis tricks Mac or Mac tricks Charlie or Charlie has been tricking both of them all along? Somehow, this ridiculous show manages to entertain us without any semblance of character development or the remotest whiff of a familiar, relatable scenario. This farce wins out through sheer courage of conviction. The show's actors (McElhenney created the show, Howerton and Day write for it, and they're obviously a tightknit group: Day and the actress who plays "the waitress," Mary Elizabeth Ellis, got married two years ago, and McElhenney and Olson got married last month) are seriously committed to their characters and to these unhinged stories. Through determination, they sell this show week after week. They sell it to stoners, crack smokers, losers, college students, teenagers and abnormally juvenile middle-aged people alike.

Is it a truly great show? I wouldn't go that far, but it's funny and unexpected and original, and that's much, much more than you can say for 95 percent of the comedies currently on the air.

Maybe that's a loserly way of thinking about it. What can I say? There's a scarcity of funny shows on TV right now. Besides, maybe this is a good lesson for us, as a recession breathes down our necks like an angry, belligerent drunk: Beggars can't be choosers, but they can be losers.