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President evil!
In contrast to "The Sopranos," "24" (9 p.m. Mondays on Fox) has wisely swerved off the expected path into new territory during the second half of its fifth season. But even though CTU is no longer concerned with an imminent terrorist catastrophe, the mood is more apocalyptic than ever, as Jack and his renegade agents focus on exposing President Logan for the creepy evildoer we always suspected he was. This recent shift from disaster to deceit has given "24" a nice late-season shot in the arm. After all, we've already squeaked through more looming nightmares than we care to remember, from a nuclear bomb falling on Los Angeles to the spread of an Ebola-like virus that caused victims to bleed from their orifices. And that's not to mention the now-unforgettable release of nerve gas at CTU headquarters, which left Edgar and Lynn dead and the rest of the staff reeling in its wake. As satisfying as it was to see such deliciously horrifying scenarios unfold before our voyeur eyes, we're so conditioned to expect the annihilation of big, anonymous segments of the Los Angeles population after five seasons of "24" that we can't really get that worked up over it. When the Russian terrorist guy said something about 200,000 potential casualties a few weeks ago, I thought, "Is that all? Come on, guy! You can do better than that. Stop underachieving and set your sights a little higher already."

But a coverup! That's another story. We've seen thousands of real American lives lost in the past year, what we haven't seen is a violent bitch-slapping of the Oval Office. Leave it to the geniuses at "24" to find something even more satisfying than hysterical strangers, foaming at the mouth or bleeding out!

I mean, the notion that President Logan might actually have to answer for his sneaky plans and nefarious, covert actions! Sure, it's a pretty unbelievable scenario, a real fantasy sequence. The writers must've been huffing on the funny pipe when they dreamt this one up. Ha! A president, having to face up to his lies and deceit! Who thought of this wacky story line? Give that nutty guy a raise!

Even that scene where the first lady (Jean Smart) told the president (Greg Itzin) that he disgusted her was a little far-fetched. She looked right into his eyes and said she hated him and while she would keep her mouth shut, she would never, ever see him the same way again! Most of us at home were like, "Hey, lady! Go easy on the guy. He's the president. Don't you get it? It's his constitutional right to lie with impunity. Haven't you listened to anything Scott McClellan has been telling us for the past year?"

And isn't it widely recognized and accepted that our president is allowed to kill anyone he wants to? But hey, if Jack's got his panties in a bunch over "corruption that leads all the way to the top," and "egregious abuses of power," well then, we do, too! Whatever you say, Jack!

I also love how Chloe is stepping up and playing the hero through it all. Edgar's death really seems to have changed her, don't you think? She went from whimpering and staring at her hands to blackmailing that nasty lunatic girl on the fly in order to sneak out of CTU and then seeking out Bill Buchanan (who was conveniently hanging out at home when she arrived, perhaps flipping through his CTU scrapbook and sniffling softly). Now she's going to great lengths to continue to break the law from Buchanan's pad, and she even refused to turn off the computers and hide when Buchanan got the word from the head of Homeland that a CTU task force was on its way over to arrest her. She knows how important it is to help Jack track down that tape that implicates Logan, that's why! She recognizes the importance of "egregious abuses of power," even if we don't!

My, my, where do they find these heroes? I mean, Wayne, Jack, Audrey, Chloe, Bill -- so many fine patriots out there, risking their necks in order to get to the truth. How many of us would put our asses on the line just to put an end to corruption that leads to the very top of the food chain? How many of us are even willing to consider what corruption is, or even vaguely grasp the structure of our government, the checks and balances in place in order to keep one of the branches of government from seizing too much power and leading our great nation to the brink of destruction and worldwide war?

But let's not worry our pretty little heads about any of that. Nah, let's just crawl into bed and pull the covers up to our chins, while that old mangy dog whines and claws at the door outside. Do you hear that? It's starting to rain. It's so cozy to stay in bed on a rainy day, especially when wars are waging far, far away and the whining of that sad old dog reminds you of just how warm and dry and safe you are, by comparison.

Luckily, we can tell the same old happy-go-lucky bedtime stories about American heroism and ingenuity, stories that make us feel OK about ourselves, that make us feel that everything is going to be all right. Instead of looking too hard at the facts, we can daydream about American flags waving and fathers giving their sons cute little puppy dogs. We can turn the TV up really loud, because we know that in the end, President Logan will get caught, and he'll pull off his mask and reveal that he's actually old Mr. McGregor from the mill! Gasp! And he would've gotten away with it, too, if it weren't for those meddling kids over at CTU!

So here's to the meddling kids of the world. Let's hope that the next generation of meddling kids is a little more informed and courageous and idealistic than we were.

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