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Recently in Salon Health & Body

Urge
Big issues
I handle an oversized john without letting him in on the secret.
By Tracy Quan
[11/08/99]

Books
"The Red Devil"
A woman with cancer rediscovers her body through a passionate love affair.
By Katherine Russell Rich
[11/08/99]

Urge: Naked World
Gay refugees seek asylum in friendly South Africa
Once a place for hate, the new and improved nation now boasts one of the most accepting constitutions in the world.
By Hank Hyena
[11/08/99]

Urge
The Date Doctor is in!
A new romance service offers professional daters who will chat, flirt and tear you apart for a fee.
By Denise Dowling
[11/06/99]

Column
The power of prunes
Plum growers hope stronger bones and moister meat loaf can replace regularity as the fruit's selling points.
By Mary Roach
[11/05/99]

Complete archives for Health & Body

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Despite Brown's efforts, the catcher remained blind to her desires. She interpreted Brown's meaningful looks from the pitcher's mound as confusion about the ball count. And she mistook Brown's bouts of lovesick melancholy as depression over the team's lousy record.

Summer was drawing to a close, and Brown had all but given up hope of winning the catcher's heart. But, then, a miracle occurred. During a playoff game, a runner barreled into home, smashing the catcher's lovely head into the plate. Brown sprinted from the mound, pushing aside other players in her rush to reach her beloved. She gathered the fallen catcher in her arms (at last!) and carried her off the field.

"She was bleeding all over," said Brown, still giddy from the memory. "I removed my shirt and used it to clean her wound. I took her to the hospital for stitches. And then we started dating."

Some people think that the only thing lesbians have going for them is their ability to talk for hours about their cats. But what really sets us apart -- aside from our interesting hairdos -- is our knack for recognizing that a concussion is merely a dating opportunity dressed up in a bloody bandage.

Lesbians spend most of their lives running around like idiots on softball and rugby fields. So it's not surprising that many relationships begin in an emergency room -- especially given the fact that for all their athletic bravado, lesbians are notoriously bashful in more genteel pursuits. Many lesbians would rather cruise the softball diamonds, waiting for a cute girl to stumble and fall, than simply invite her over for dinner.

"It's really hard to ask someone for her phone number. She might say 'no.' But if someone you're attracted to breaks her leg, she's not going to stop you from helping her limp off the field," explained Sue Ryan, a 29-year-old who plays football and softball, and who recently completed the Chicago Marathon. "You can put your arms around her waist, and it's a perfectly acceptable way to start touching her."

Sports injuries and their associated scar tissue have a magnetic effect on lesbian hands. Walk into any lesbian bar and you're sure to find a woman with one pant leg rolled up, getting her damaged flesh petted by bewitched patrons. "You see a wicked knee scar and you say 'ooooh,' and you want to touch it," explained Vicky Vasconcellos, a member of the Chicago softball team that placed fourth in the 1998 Gay Games in Amsterdam.

"Scars are an icebreaker," said Ryan. "They give you something to talk about when you're standing at the bar. Once a bunch of women start talking about their injuries, well, it can go on all night. It's gross, but it's a good way to get to know someone."

In addition to its social cachet, a sports injury may provide your first clue in this increasingly ambiguous world that a woman is a lesbian. In fact, to some, if you don't sport a shiny, jagged line on your body, your sexuality just may be open for debate.

"If I see someone who doesn't have knee scars, I think she may not be a real lesbian," said Vasconcellos. About 10 years ago, Vasconcellos injured her knee in a skiing accident. "At the time I was injured I was beginning to realize I was gay. As my knee healed, I became more lesbian."

"Maybe my knee injury turned me into a lesbian," she added, thoughtfully.

Next page | Vast acres of scarred lesbian flesh