To print this page, select "Print" from the File menu of your browser salon.com > Health & Body Nov. 16, 1999 URL: http://www.salon.com/health/sex/urge/world/1999/11/16/orgasm Does Helena Bonham-Carter's fake orgasm rival Meg Ryan's? When it comes to canned moans, audiences love variety. - - - - - - - - - - - - By Hank Hyena Nov. 16, 1999 Do great orgasms last longer than Oscars? American actress Meg Ryan and British thespian Helena Bonham-Carter have never nabbed Academy Awards, but they'll both be immortally cherished for their caterwauling, cinematic climaxes. Ryan's charm and humor etched itself intimately into public memory when she launched loose with a wholesome, cheerful and (of course) perky orgasm in her hit film "When Harry Met Sally." Her buoyant-blond persona was exuberantly expressed in this sweet, artificial sexual surrender that's been touted ever since as the Ultimate On-screen O. Actresses since then have wailed but failed to top Meg's moaning masterpiece. Comparisons are unfair, though, when the challenger screams in a decidedly different tone. In "Fight Club," Helena Bonham-Carter delivers a Gothic, angst-ridden medley of grunts, gasps and shrieks that are wondrously uninhibited and thoroughly un-Ryanesque. Both stars are passionate, but Bonham-Carter produces decibels of pain and nihilism, rather than nice and (of course) perky. Different roles obviously demand distinct vocalizations. In "Fight Club" the normally cherubic Helena plays a "psychotic sex machine," notes the Toronto Sun, which praised her "purely physical, unfettered, animalistic encounters" with co-star Brad Pitt, "that put the primal scream back into orgasm." Filming skin-scenes with buff-Brad was not as steamy as the shrieks indicate. "Brad had white dots all over his body ... so the computer had data to reproduce [us]," Bonham-Carter informed the Mirror in an interview Sunday. "We assumed different positions ... surrounded by white lights and a still camera that took photos. On the count of three we had to, ah, orgasm," she shyly concludes. Loud lovers who think they climax as convincingly as Meg or Helena can exhibit their ecstasy publicly now, notes an article Sunday in the Independent (London). SuperClubs, the Caribbean resort populated by international swinging singles, offers a Hedonism II "Be Wicked for a Week" vacation with an abundance of sexy get-aquainted games, like the "Fake Orgasm Contest." An informal clapometer determines the best erotic communicator of the universal language of lust. salon.com | Nov. 16, 1999