Salon Drama Queen for a Day | Wherefore art thou, weirdo?

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Last contest:

Winner
+ Cathy Wilkinson
+ Acceptance speech

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A L S O++T O D A Y

Raging hormones
By Celeste Fremon
When I gave birth at nearly 40, I never considered the fact that 12 years later my son and I would both be having hot flashes

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T A B L E++T A L K
Are your children learning about judicial process through "Ally McBeal"? Talk about the influence of TV on kids in the Mothers area of Table Talk
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BROWSE THE DRAMA QUEEN ARCHIVE
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Mamafesto
By Camille Peri
Why it's time
for Mothers Who Think

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Illustration by Katherine Streeter

D R A M A_Q U E E N_ +
Wherefore art thou weirdo?
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Send us your tales of the strangest declarations of love. Reminisce about your oddest moment of heartfelt, mortifying affection and win a $100 gift certificate from barnesandnoble.com.

Everyone dreams of being someone else's fantasy. An expression of love from someone you'd never noticed before, a secret admirer note slipped inside a coat pocket, a bouquet of irises with an indecipherable note attached -- any of these can make us see the whole world through rose-colored glasses. Even if the admiration isn't reciprocated, finding that you're an object of earnest affection is rare flattery.

But what if you discover that a cashier at the discount furniture store where you bought a cheap table copied your address off your check? And then started sending anonymous bouquets of roses, followed by having his friends call you -- drunk, at midnight -- with his whiny declarations of love? Sounds like Cyrano, but not really, because the only way to get rid of the gnome is to get him fired and change your phone number.

We want to know: What's the strangest declaration of love you have ever encountered?

Was it a crass joke, meant to be a romantic overture? A midnight serenade more humiliating than flattering? Or maybe a singing telegram at work, sending the gooey message to your boss and all of your co-workers as well? Or maybe just enigmatic -- like the three teenage boys who threw handfuls of pansies into a convertible as it idled at a stoplight, and then took off on their skateboards, calling, "You're so pretty!" to the startled driver.

Send in the story of the strangest declaration of love you've ever received to dramaqueen@salonmagazine.com by Feb. 5, 1999 -- and meanwhile, find out which of our Drama Queen candidates has been crowned the Queen of terrible toys.
SALON | Jan. 25, 1999

Drama Queen for a Day + Cathy Wilkinson + Fran Liscio + Chil Truth

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