- - - - - - - - - -

T A B L E_T A L K

Stepparents discuss the benefits and costs of shaping new families in the Mothers area of Table Talk

___________________

Search barnesandnoble.com for books about parenting and the family.
___________________

R E C E N T L Y

The last waltz
By Anne Lamott
A dying woman calls her community together to thank it, to say goodbye -- and to dance
(12/23/98)

Forever young
By Joan Walsh
In defense of My Twinn: Why the doll that horrifies parents appeals to children
(12/22/98)

Star quality
By Debra Ollivier
A "Little Prince" among men
(12/22/98)

Forever young
By Joan Walsh
In defense of My Twinn: Why the doll that horrifies parents appeals to children
(12/21/98)

Airstrikes of mercy
By Geraldine Brooks
A former Middle East correspondent explains how Saddam Hussein turned her from a pacifist into a hawk
(12/21/98)

BROWSE THE MOTHERS WHO THINK FEATURE ARCHIVES

- - - - - - - - - -

Mamafesto
By Camille Peri
Why it's time
for Mothers Who Think

- - - - - - - - - -

THE LEGISLATORS WHO ARE PIOUSLY "VOTING THEIR CONSCIENCE" HAVE BEEN CONSISTENTLY SCREWING THE FUTURE FOR OUR CHILDREN.

For the past few months, I've been getting calls almost daily from reporters assigned to develop stories around the concept "What the family will look like in the coming millennium." A typical example of the angle many editors are taking on the issue is a November Newsweek cover story headlined "Tomorrow's Child." The report, a puffy lifestyle forecast ("The child born in the year 2000 may face epidemics of previously unknown tropical diseases, but he also may be able to eat broccoli Jell-O instead of broccoli"), did include one expert's estimate that economic polarization among children will increase. But much more space was devoted to enthusiastic musings by "futurists" and trend-spotters about the educational and health technologies that will become available. Marketing consultant Faith Popcorn, the woman who added "cocooning" to our vocabulary, offered a scenario about as reassuring as her name: While mothers will continue to work outside the home, Popcorn predicted, toy manufacturers will turn out "mommy dolls" to keep the lonely latchkey children company. Other articles have speculated about cars that will warn commuting parents of traffic jams down the road and houses with Hal-like computers and interactive appliances that will match socks and make out shopping lists.

As a family historian, I've spent a lot of time and energy trying to convince people to abandon misplaced nostalgia about childhood and parenting, but inane optimism about the future is not exactly a useful alternative. Unfortunately, questions such as "What will the family of the future look like?" can only generate superficial answers.

There are two big problems with discussing what will happen to the family in the next millennium. The first is that it presumes there is such a thing as a typical family. American families are already extraordinarily diverse in their structure, racial-ethnic affiliation, economic security, age composition and gender roles. This diversity will surely increase in the next century. The second is that the question ignores the political and social choices that will affect the answer. We're not tracking long-range weather patterns here. What families will look like in the new millennium depends on decisions we make -- or fail to make -- right now.

N E X T_ P A G E: Will we figure out a way to help all parental figures do a better job of raising their children?