Somewhere on the hell-in-a-handbasket spectrum between "Hot Tween Nurses" and the nearly 100 percent-vendor-sponsored Brooklyn wedding lies the Web site BuyJake.com, on which North Carolina mother Traci Hogg offers advertising space on ... her son. When the price is right, she'll dress Jake in hats and shirts bearing company logos. She's logged one bid so far -- $350 for a month -- from a company that transfers home movies to DVD. She's holding out for more. All proceeds will go into a savings account for Jake, a percentage of which is presumably earmarked for therapy.

"If this seems a little like 'Gypsy,' or perhaps a cautionary tale about child labor laws, Hogg swears it's all in good fun," reports the Associated Press. "When I'm taking him places, everyone seems to notice him and notice what he's wearing," Hogg said. "They always say he wears the cutest outfits, and I thought, someone should be paying me to put their logo on him."

A couple of other mothers (no one really talks about the dads) have participated in similar schemes, notes the AP, including a Connecticut woman who "sold the right to name her baby for $15,500 to online casino GoldenPalace.com -- a site that also paid for ad space on a woman's cleavage and on the stomachs of a pregnant woman and a 400-pound man." The child's name is Golden Palace Benedetto, which, thanks to the mom's foresight, should prepare her for a solid future as a hot tween nurse.

Child psychiatrist Michael Brody, chairman of the television and media committee of the American Academy of Child Psychiatry, is not a BuyJake.com fan. "Who knows what kind of pedophile is trolling Web sites looking for young people," he asked, adding, "There's so much pressure now. Kids can't just take the SATs, they have to have tutors. They can't just play outside, they have to be on a competitive sports team ... Can't we just let kids be kids for a while before we force them into work?" Also, NPR just did a piece about how television commercials are turning children into junk food zombies (duh). Can you imagine restricting TV at home, only to have your kid come in from day care and say, "I want the Sponge Bob Mac & Cheese I saw on Jake's head!"?

And speaking of therapy, what -- as the AP points out -- of Jake's 5-year-old big bro David, who could get the message that he's cute, but not that cute?

Still, for all my crankiness, I just don't know. More than anything else, BuyJake.com just makes me want to roll my eyes, shrug my shoulders and say, "Ya know, people are cuckoo." But maybe that's because when the heat index is 187 degrees, shaking a fist is too much to ask. Your thoughts?