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Recently in Salon Mothers Who Think

Column
Y'all take care now
30,000 feet above Jackson, Miss., I came to believe it was time to start a novel.
By Anne Lamott
[07/22/99]

Gen X's change of head
To the women who came of age in the '60s, oral sex was an act of great intimacy. To their daughters, it's about as intimate as shaking hands.
By Shari Thurer
[07/21/99]

The modesty debate
Wendy Shalit: Stop pressuring young women to have sex!
Leora Tanenbaum: Every girl is a potential "slut."
By Lori Leibovich
[07/21/99]

Formula for disaster
Why do many doctors take a neutral or even pro-formula stance with their patients--despite evidence of the serious potential hazards of bottle-feeding?
By Katie Allison Granju
[07/20/99]

Son of hope
In a video aimed at turning young thugs into Christians, serial killer David Berkowitz confesses, "I was a real jerk."
By Cintra Wilson
[07/16/99]

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Colin: Please, I know. Maybe because I married you I'm not shocked by the idea that the wife has a vivid imagination. But maybe because you married me , you shouldn't be surprised by my indifference to Harford. These densely urban, marital transgressions and sexual wanderings are what I try to write about. What does he risk, really? He chats up a friendly prostitute and goes to a mansion and sees a lot of people having sex in funny costumes. He never approaches anything like intimacy with any of these people. He's not forced into a dangerous choice where either action involves loss. He never puts many chips on the table. It's a freak show, or as you would have it, a dream.

Kathryn: Can you really be that reductive about the orgy scene? Just funny costumes? Just because you're more sophisticated than Harford, does that make his journey unaffecting? Our children lose their baby teeth and that's a transformation, one we feel, even though we're years beyond it. As for loss -- what about the masked participant who dies as a result of his trespass?

Colin: I thought about that. You could take the Sidney Pollack character's word for it, that her death is unconnected to the events in the mansion, that she locked herself in her hotel room and shot up and died and no one else is responsible -- that she's just a junkie, but not only is he an untrustworthy source, but that explanation doesn't imagine her sorrow or remorse or agony over what might have happened in the mansion. And if you think about that, then Harford is accountable, does have blood on his hands --

Kathryn: Which do you believe?

Colin: I knew you'd ask me that. I think -- in a horrible way -- that I agree with the host, the Sidney Pollack character. It was coming to her. She was on that track toward self-destruction, no matter whether she met Harford or not.

Kathryn: What's at stake in this film is the progress of Harford's soul; it doesn't matter if the amoral Pollack character is right, it doesn't matter if the prostitute was self destructive; the only thing that matters is that Harford believes that he is culpable. Actually, this is a film with a strong moral agenda. The only sexual experience that doesn't invite death is vanilla, hetero, marital sex.

Colin: Wait, there's a difference between what's done and who's doing it.

Kathryn: Is there? Even when Harford imagines his wife with her demon lover it's straight up missionary sex, her always on the bottom.

Colin: Well, you know what I think about that.

Kathryn: I'm sure I do. Is this a movie about passion ignited by jealousy?

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