It's a man's world

But what's the sugar-coated message you want them to take away?

The No. 1 thing is my resentment of trends and this group-think mentality. A lot of people feel the same way I do when I see someone in a brand-new $200 pair of jeans with holes in it, or premature fades. The people who wear these jeans are people who are trying to buy this genuine aged look that only comes from years of hard work and not being able to afford new jeans. Trying to artificially buy this look upsets a lot of people. So it's a rejection of pop culture and trends. But I guess I have to be aware that the larger my site becomes, the more I'm becoming a trend myself.

What are your politics?

In terms of the two major parties, I'm politically neutral. When Clinton was in office, I wasn't happy and I wrote articles bashing him, and people called me on the right. Now that Bush is in office, I'm not happy and people say I'm on the left. So I think I'm doing something right. The very first year I could vote, I voted for Perot. I think Ross "The Boss" Perot was the man.

How did you move from your anti-trend Web site to a book about manliness?

Well, I was reading this book about lesbians, and it had pictures in it. It was almost like a graphic novel. And I was thinking, "Why hasn't someone done this kind of book, except for guys?" The way I've written the book is as a parody of a children's book and a reference book. And I always wanted to write children's books, except I hate kids.

Is that true?

Oh yeah. My favorite kids book is "Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs." It's so creative, and that's the book that sparked my imagination as a child and here I am, bitter and balding, and I never got to write that book. But I did write this book, which is kind of a parody of a children's book. I didn't write a book about food that falls from the sky, but I did write a book about boners.

Right. Masculinity.

The new masculinity.

What is the new masculinity?

The new masculinity is a muted version of the old masculinity. When I talk about old masculinity I'm talking about guys like my dad. My dad is a really tough guy. He fought in Korea, and if you took a look at this guy's hands you would see [that they] are big and callused and gnarled and there's stuff just oozing from them, and I think he has oil stains that are there permanently. And my hands in comparison are not like that. Sometimes he grabs my hands, and he calls me a pussy, and he walks away. To give you an idea what kind of guy he is, we went fishing once and he didn't have anything to gut and clean the fish, so he bit into its stomach and bit its guts out and spit them on the ground. True story. I was 13 or 14.

Were you horrified?

Yeah. I pretty much was. When I was a kid I was scared of June bugs, and he would take them and eat them, I guess to scare me more or something ... I've never seen my dad listen to music in my life. Radio in his car is probably the least-used piece of equipment. I've never seen him intentionally watch TV. The only thing that guy likes to do is work, and usually with tools.

Is your dad's model of masculinity what men today should be aspiring to?

It's hard to say because the world is changing. Obviously we're working with computers, you and I, and my dad and his generation didn't. But the reason books like mine and books like Harvey Mansfield's are coming out is that it's a callback to this feeling of the manly man, like this nostalgic feeling. It's a good feeling to know that there are guys out there like that.

You don't think men are going to start acting like that again?

No. You have, I hate to use the word, but the "metrosexual" revolution: guys who know what conditioner is. My girlfriend's been trying to convince me that it's useful for years. Guys today know cosmetics. Guys know these things that are traditionally feminine and books like mine are a callback to the old-school masculinity.

But Mansfield's book is a call to arms, hoping to get men to behave like that again. Yours seems to be making light of that kind of man.

My book is a much more lighthearted approach to the subject. Mansfield is a Harvard professor. His book has a thesis, and he's talking about wars, and the things that shaped man, and the people who read his book are much more the NPR crowd, people who are actually really interested in the subject. Whereas in my book, I don't have a thesis. I'd be surprised if there was a single fact in my book that people could take away. There's satire in my book about modern life. It's a much more cynical approach to manliness that will eventually have a larger impact because people like comedy.

OK, but the things that have altered the role of men -- computers, as you said, and different kinds of wars and the feminist movement -- would you say they were bad things?

No, I would not. It's just that the world has changed. It's gone too far forward to go so far back. I can't even foresee a world in which that [kind of man] could happen again unless there was a nuclear holocaust and we lost most of our electrical infrastructure. Then you would see manly men like my dad. I wouldn't necessarily say that how things have changed is all for the better, but most of the changes were necessary.

Next page: "Forty to 45 percent of all my readers are female"