May 13, 1999 | One way to get your point across: Insert it on not one, not two, but three U.S. government Web sites. And then, just for extra snicks, mess with the minds behind the White House's official Web site, too.

That's what a ballsy band of computer hackers protesting NATO's bumble-headed bombing of the Chinese Embassy in Belgrade did earlier this week. The anti-NATO messages caused the Energy Department, the Interior Department and the National Park Service to pull their Web sites offline Monday to rid them of the unwanted bitter bits, one of which partially read (in suspiciously Quayle-esque prose) as follows:

Amy Reiter Amy Reiter's column appears daily on the People site, Monday through Friday. + Biography + Archives Got a hot tip? Tell Amy!

"Protest U.S.A.'s Nazi action! Protest NATO's brutal action! We are Chinese hackers who take no cares about politics. But we can not stand by watching our Chinese reporters been killed which you might have know. Whatever the purpose is, NATO led by U.S.A. must take absolute responsibility ..."

And while no one knows precisely whom to hold responsible for the pesky postings on these sites or a simultaneous hacking attempt that caused officials to shut down the White House's Web site on Monday night (it's now back up and looking as stately and impenetrable as ever), the Washington Post reports that at least one of the hacks has been traced back to China and the case is now in the trusty hands of the FBI.

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Democratic style: It's a good thing

"Martha Stewart is backing Al Gore. She always liked elaborate, motionless centerpieces."

-- Los Angeles newsletter editor George Mair on marvelous Martha's tastefully discreet presidential campaign contribution.

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The sweet spell of success

Looks like Mr. Potatoehead is up to his old tricks again. The Sierra Club recently sent all presidential hopefuls invitations to a forum on the environment, scheduled for November 1999. According to an Oakland, Calif., newsletter, event organizers were surprised to receive the following response from spelling-bee champ Dan Quayle: "I am considering attending your forum on the enviroment in November ..." Mr. Quayle, sir, are you sure you didn't mean environmente?

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Who's the mystery man who gave Willey the willies?

Alleged Clinton gropee Kathleen Willey's moment basking in the dubious afterglow of the White House sex scandal is not over. In fact, she's turning one section of her oft-heard story into a bit of a whodunnit. Appearing Tuesday night on CNBC's "Hardball," wily Willey told host Chris Matthews that she knows the identity of the frightening fellow who approached her two days before she testified about her blush-inducing brush with Bill in the Oval Office.

At the time, the spooky stranger spoke of Willey's missing cat and slashed car tires -- and then referred to her impending testimony. "It was meant to scare me," she said.

But, like certain other presidential gal-pals we could name, Willey may be even more intimidated by Ken Starr's office. She refuses to publicly reveal the man's identity, saying only that Starr's henchmen are looking into the matter.

Gotta admit, despite Kathleen's crafty attempt to extend her 15 minutes even further, the suspense ain't exactly killin' me ...

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And you thought the Cold War was over ...

Nyet, it simply couldn't be. And yet the idea is strangely compelling ...

A source tells Nothing Personal that a man has been strolling the streets of Chicago sporting half a sandwich board sign (if he couldn't get a whole one, it's the damn commies' fault) that reads as follows: "Al Gore has been assassinated and replaced by a Russian spy." Could that explain the veep's uncanny resemblance to dynamic, formaldehyde-enhanced Hero of the People Vladimir Lenin?

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The return of Robert Bork?

"As president ... I would have a litmus test for the Supreme Court. My nominees would be pro-life, pro-Constitution. I might even bring back Bork."

-- Presidential candidate, New Hampshire senator and self-described "country music Republican" Bob Smith, outlining his platform.

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No animals have been harmed in the making of this coat -- NOT!

From all the fur flying in Beverly Hills in recent weeks, visitors to the star-packed city might have thought they had landed in the courtroom with Jeffrey Katzenberg and Michael Eisner. But the town's well-meaning wealthies have spoken, and they want freedom from labels that might have seriously bummed their fashion highs.

A proposal backed by high-profile animal rights activists including Jack Lemmon, Larry King, Doris Day, Jean-Claude Van Damme and Angie Dickinson to require fur coats to carry credit card-size labels listing eight intensely repulsive ways the animals "may have been killed" was overwhelmingly rejected on Tuesday by the town's ritzy residents.

"This product is made with fur from animals that may have been killed by electrocution, gassing, neck breaking, poisoning, clubbing, stomping or drowning, and may have been trapped in steel-jaw, leg-hold traps," chirped the cheery labels, which would have been required unless the seller could verify that the animal was killed in a humane fashion. (Such as what, petted to death?)

And while folks like Wayne Pacelle, a spokesman for the Humane Society, one of the many animal rights groups that supported the measure, have been left out in the cold, yelping that wearing fur in torrid and sunny Beverly Hills is "gaudiness and cruelty at its absolute worst," some townies are simply bemoaning the $60,000 it cost to bring the measure to a vote. Let's see now, how many label-free mink stoles would that buy you?
salon.com | May 13, 1999

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