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Kiss off, Kate
Give me a ralphing Pilgrim, a dolphin porn movie and sex-shy turtles over some reheated Broadway operetta any day.

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Amy Reiter

Flowergate!
MSNBC pundit Norah O'Donnell plucks up! Plus: Porn stars do it for democracy. And: Jennifer Lopez's dress voted most popular. Butt refuses to comment.

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By Amy Reiter

March 2, 2000 | Sheesh! And I thought I'd squeezed all there was to squeeze out of my invite to the Hoover Institution's fancy dinner-do Tuesday night!

I ogled Alan Greenspan along with the rest of the conservative think tank's invitees. (He looked mighty tired, and so, oddly enough, did the Secret Service men who followed him like fuzzy gosling.) I scarfed down the Peking duck, tossed back the red wine, chatted amiably with my fellow media members, exchanged a few cards.

I even elbowed my way through the throngs crowding the lamb-chop table, where a friendly fellow in a bow tie taught me the true meaning of compassionate conservatism by gallantly allowing me to cut in line.



Amy Reiter

Amy Reiter's column appears daily on the People site, Monday through Friday.

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But alas, I was outdone by MSNBC pundit Norah O'Donnell, who stuck around for two hours after the party's official end -- and then startled her hosts by plucking herself a festive bouquet of exotic flowers from the centerpiece as her fiance looked on.

O'Donnell's audacity was the talk of conservative circles on Wednesday. "If I were her fiance, I'd have been mortified," snarked one attendee. "I'd have sold a kidney before I let her do something like that. The payments on that huge engagement ring of hers must be pretty high."

Me, I'm just ticked I didn't think of it myself.

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Someone's channeling Phoebe again

"I think it bodes well for world peace that 'Friends' is a success everywhere in the world."

-- Lisa Kudrow in Britain's Heat magazine: All she is saying is give "Friends" a chance?

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Partying porn-free

You know things are getting bad when even John Wayne Bobbitt skips out on your party for moral reasons.

The APA news agency reports that porn stars including Bobbitt, Chi Chi La Rue and the lesbian duo Janine and Julia Ann are refusing to attend Thursday's annual Vienna Opera Ball to protest the power of the far right in Austria. The party boycott follows that of mainstream stars like Catherine Deneuve, Claudia Cardinale and Jacqueline Bisset.

"I've given away my ticket," one sex magazine publisher told the news agency. "I'm not going."

Ah, the seamy underside of party politics ...

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Toking up for Chas

"Boy, he'd burn a spliff to this. A big, big spliff."

-- Bob Marley's widow, Rita, on how her late husband would have honored Prince Charles during his visit to Trenchtown in Kingston, Jamaica.

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Juicy bits

As if pro wrestling weren't racy enough. When wrestling fans gathered at 17 theaters across Canada to watch a pay-per-view World Wrestling Federation event Sunday night, they saw a little more action than they'd bargained for. A technician at a Toronto company mistakenly switched the satellite feed over to a hardcore porn channel. Joanne Fraser, an exec at the Viacom division hosting the event, told the Hollywood Reporter, "We were all completely shocked by this." So much for family entertainment.

It's official. The pasted-on scarf Jennifer Lopez wore to the Grammys has captured the imagination of the Web-using public. According to Lycos' weekly rankings, "Jennifer Lopez's dress" was the 13th most searched for term on its site last week, while Lopez herself was the fourth most popular search term. Carlos "Nine Grammys" Santana, meanwhile, limped in at No. 54. Maybe he should show a little more cleavage.

Oh, Ma! Melissa Gilbert, of "Little House on the Prairie" fame, is fixing to raise TV tykes of her own. According to the Hollywood Reporter, the erstwhile Laura Ingalls will star as a nurse who adopts a brood of multiracial kiddies in Spelling TV's "Finally Home." Wait till Nellie Olsen hears about this.

Can you feel the love tonight? The performers of Elton John's Broadway version of "Aida" apparently felt no such thing this Sunday. The New York Post reports that John stormed out of a preview just 15 minutes into it. He reportedly felt the techno-style in two of the songs was "already dated" -- and huffily headed for the door. Will the show be just another candle in the wind?
salon.com | March 2, 2000

 

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About the writer
Amy Reiter is a staff writer for Salon People. For more columns by Amy Reiter, visit her column archive.

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