"What has happened to the Democrats since the November election?" Barbra Streisand inquired in a stinging, three-page memo she sent to a handful of top Democrats in Washington last week. "Some of you seem paralyzed, demoralized and depressed."

In the memo, entitled "Nice Guys Finish Last or Where Do We Go From Here: A Case for the Democrats" and published on RollCall.com, the Funny Lady makes clear that she is not amused by the infighting within her party that she believes has distracted them from slamming away at the Republicans.

"I hope you're through arguing among yourselves and distancing yourselves from President [Bill] Clinton. Let's not let them divert attention from the success of his administration over the past eight years," she implored. "Let's not allow the Republicans to take away the gains we've made."

After urging the Democrats to "win back the House, the Senate and Presidency," Babs took a few shots at President Bush, calling him arrogant and untrustworthy, while marveling at his popularity. "Look at his ratings -- how could such a destructive man be so popular with the American people?"

But lest you think Streisand herself is looking to hop into the political arena and challenge the president herself, the singer's publicist, Dick Guttman, insists that she has no such intentions.

"She said people confuse political passion with political ambition," Guttman told Reuters.

Too bad, because if she did run for office, she might just win it by a nose.

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Family man

"I want 100 more children. If Vanessa is willing, I'll certainly try."

-- Vanessa Paradis partner Johnny Depp, sharing his wishes for a really, really big family.

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Razzie, what Razzie?

If you were worried about how John Travolta took the news that his pet project "Battlefield Earth" virtually swept the Razzie Awards last month, relax. Travolta insists he had no idea his beloved flop had won the Golden Raspberry for the year's worst film and that he himself had taken home the metaphorical award for worst performance by an actor.

"I didn't even know there were such awards," Travolta tells the Calgary Sun. "I have people around me whose job it is to not tell me about such things. They're obviously doing their job.

"Not every film can be a critical and box-office success. It would have been awful only if 'Battlefield Earth' was neither," he says. "That's not the case. It is edging toward the $100-million mark which means it has found an audience even if it didn't impress critics."

Then again, audience connection or not, Travolta does seem to be rethinking all that sequel talk. "There's always a possibility but right now it's not a priority," he tells the paper. "I have quite a busy slate."

All together now: Phew!

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How J-Lo can you go?

"I am J-Lee, Jay Leno is J-No and David Copperfield's is D-Cup."

-- Jamie Lee Curtis on the J.Lo. phenomenon.

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Juicy bits

Speaking of David Copperfield, the magician's handlers insist he's A-OK after having been rushed to the hospital in New York on Friday. It was exhaustion, they say, that caused him to collapse while rehearsing a live televised stunt in which he stands in the middle of a "tornado of fire." "He has gone without sleep for 48 hours," his publicists told the press. "He has been rehearsing nonstop, and this has obviously taken its toll." Tempest in a D-Cup?

Just because Paul McCartney just bought Courtney Love's old house in the Hollywood Hills ($4 million, 4,700 square feet) doesn't mean he's ready to settle down. The ex-Beatle insists that, despite the claims of his girlfriend's estranged father, he and Heather Mills are not planning to get hitched anytime soon. "It's not true. We are not getting married," he told the U.K. press. Honestly, you'd think the world had had enough of silly marriage rumors.

Forget all that "size of the boat, motion of the ocean" stuff. Janet Jackson says size does matter. "I'm a size queen. Honestly. If I'm on a date and I see the guy is not packing, that's when I fake a backache," Jackson tells the U.K. Sun. "Suddenly, your back goes out. I learned that from my friends." If you didn't think she was a nasty girl before ...

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Miss something? Read yesterday's Nothing Personal.

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