It was not only Buster's first baseball game in San Francisco, it was also the first time I'd bought a ticket and watched Bonds from the stands since the steroid revelations broke after the 2003 season. I had wondered whether I'd join in the cheering, whether I'd feel funny about it if I did, whether my enjoyment of a day at the ballpark would be affected by the whole psychodrama and semiotics of Barry Bonds, my team's guy and blight on the national pastime.
Nope. I sat with my boy and our friends and, in one of the few moments during which I was able to look at the game -- did I mention Buster is 4? -- Bonds lined a single in his first at-bat, a rare bright spot in a desultory but delightfully sunny 5-0 loss by the locals to the Pittsburgh Pirates.
As a typist, a media guy, I churn and worry over Barry Bonds, what he means, the true value of his accomplishments, his place in history, the damage he's done to the game, whether he's a scapegoat. I care a lot about that part of Barry Bonds that's not just a baseball player hitting home runs.
As a fan, I just want to see a baseball game, and that's what I did, brow unfurrowed by concern, except about the bathroom thing. I wouldn't have minded a bit if Bonds had hit a home run, even if it had just turned 5-0 into 5-1.
I think this division in my head is pretty similar to one in the rest of the world. We media types care a lot about the scourge of drugs and other serious issues causing all sorts of moral dilemmas and deep thinking. We wrestle with corruption in college sports and public financing of stadiums. We debate race and ethics and commercialization.
We fans just want to watch a ballgame.
Here's an issue we fans can sink our teeth into: $5.50 for a little bag of nasty cotton candy. Now that's a blight on the national pastime.
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About the writer
King Kaufman is a senior writer for Salon. Visit his column archive. You can e-mail him at king at salon dot com or visit his MySpace page.
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