Ask the pilot

The mile-high snooze: Should pilots be allowed to nap? Also, airline cuisine and class warfare.

By Patrick Smith

Jul 25, 2003 | The question a couple of weeks ago about the differences between onboard classes (first, business, economy -- where am I sitting and what's the difference?) ignited yet another flurry of e-mails about service standards on different airlines. Of particular interest to me were one reader's observations not about the classes themselves, but about the widening distinctions between them. It got me thinking.

While we grumble with increasing scorn over the discomforts of the typical economy seat, the trend upfront has been in the other direction. Not since well-heeled travelers relaxed in private berths in the 1940s have things been so luxurious. Doubtless I'll be reminded this is all part of our widening economic dichotomy and a sign of the impending class war. A joke, but there's probably a grain of truth in there somewhere.

From a BusinessFirst menu of Continental Airlines, summer 2003:

Mesclun salad mix with English cucumbers, red onion rings,
Roma tomatoes and a Kalamata olive,
topped with smoked salmon with cream cheese and caviar.

Only one olive?

The Chef's Selection
Sterling Silver grilled rib-eye steak seasoned with pepper,
Accented by red wine sauce with chanterelle mushrooms
Cheddar cheese mashed potatoes with chives
Grilled green asparagus spears

Chanterelle? I have all her albums. And here's the wine, which, by the way, "the Chef recommends." (I picture a guy in a white apron strapped into one of those bulkhead jump seats next to a flight attendant.)

Wolf Blass Presidents Selection Cabernet Sauvignon 1998
This southern Australian wine is deep and concentrated in color
With extraordinary depth of flavor, exhibiting a bouquet of ripe plum
And underlying chocolate aromas.

I thought those underlying aromas were from the guy sitting next to me. As a finishing touch you don't get coffee, you get:

Freshly brewed Timothy's Custom Roasted Milano Blend

And that's not even first class. The airline's BusinessFirst, despite the intentional obfuscation, is technically business class.

Continental's pomp notwithstanding -- which, OK, sounds like some indulgent fun -- much of this gets back to my ongoing analysis of U.S. vs. foreign airlines, a theme we ostensibly curtailed a month ago. Palled by the grating tedium of domestic travel, Americans are sometimes astounded by the levels of polish and pampering aboard the best European and Asian airlines, where even the aesthetics of a plane's cabin are carefully considered.

If you have trouble fathoming the idea of airline executives poring over suggestions for cabin sidewall colors, you've probably never patronized a long-haul route aboard British Airways, Virgin or even Air Canada. "Urban Sleek" isn't the name of a rap singer, it's what Air Canada has titled the theme of its newly refitted cabins, which, at least upfront, feature sculpted sleeper seats with a massage function.

A few years ago, British Airways poured a billion dollars into revamping its interior schemes. "Colours are very emotional," says Neal Stone, a B.A. design manager speaking in a recent article in Canada's National Post. "We want colors that soothe the passenger. Blues do that. Reds, on the other hand, tend to speed the metabolism." Somehow I cannot picture the powers at Southwest or United wondering how its wall panels or carpeting might affect a passenger's metabolism.

And never mind colors, B.A. now offers 180-degree sleepers even in business class, raising the bar on a wide range of routes, including many that run head-to-head with American, United and Delta. As you'd expect, it depends on the airline, but what I wouldn't give to sit upfront aboard B.A. or join the Upper Class on a Virgin Atlantic 747. Before going bust, Swissair showcased an Eames-inspired chair with a dining table. There was even a second seat so a passenger could be joined for dinner.

In the old days, a fat leather seat and a doting stewardess were the hallmarks of world-class service, but technology and competition have combined to inspire a new, even eccentric standard. DVD libraries, noise-reduction headsets from Bose, gooseneck swivel lamps and privacy curtains have become the benchmark perks. At Virgin, B.A.'s surfeit-trendy competitor, one finds double beds, stand-up bars and an "inflight beauty therapist." Airlines even compete to outdo one another with the contents of their giveaway amenity kits. On Virgin, a rubber duck is included with the usual creams, balms and eyeshades. (Delta's Business Elite cookie tin kits, now discontinued, made great take-home collectibles.)

Such novelties manifest with particular flair in the forward rows of longer intercontinental flights, where savvy frequent fliers are more demanding than a first-time tourist on a discount flight to San Diego. Granted, however, most people aren't riding around on expense accounts, and while this is all great news to those able to afford it, there are millions of people who'll never see a first- of business-class seat.

Enter the innovations of Virgin, Emirates, B.A., Singapore Airlines and others. If you think there's only so much comfort to be wrung from a nine-abreast economy section, take a ride on Swiss International Airlines (the newly reborn Swissair), which called on Recaro GmbH, a German manufacturer of automobile seats, to cast sleek new economy chairs that add two inches of legroom in every row.

A lot of good that does us over here.

Next Page: Catching 40 winks in the cockpit

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