Scooter riders must DIE!

One of the more appalling trends of the new millennium has to be the fold-away scooter, which has eerily spread across city streets everywhere like a monster from a bad 1950s sci-fi flick. Yes, yes, we know they are faster than walking and environmentally sound. But we're sooooo tired of getting run over by dorks who believe that because they are perched on wheels the sidewalks belong to them; and besides, they look really, really stupid.

Thankfully, someone shares our loathing for these idiotic machines, and has come up with a suitable revenge: Scooter Death, one of the more deliciously nasty Flash games we've ever played. The rules are simple: Just throw carefully aimed bricks at the scooter-riding punks who ride by (being careful to avoid hitting senior citizens or genuine skateboarders). If you decapitate your target, you get 10 points.

As the creators of the game, a British Flash design company called Kerb, explain: "The world has become overrun with dickheads on fold-away scooters. Some are losers desperate for attention, others are simply normal people desperate for attention. Mincing around on these two-wheeled abominations is just a cry for help; unfortunately it is too little too late and now they must die for their crime against humanity."

We couldn't agree more. -- Janelle Brown [10:50 a.m. PST, Dec. 12, 2000]

- - - - - - - - - - - -

A new pretender to the Napster throne?

Is CenterSpan destined to be the new Napster? Consider it a sign of just how scorchingly hot the P2P file-swapping buzz has become: CenterSpan, a company formerly called ThrustMaster Corp. and best known for making gaming joysticks, today paid $9 million for the remains of the bankrupt file-swapping software service Scour. Left on the sidelines were would-be Scour purchasers Listen.com and LiquidAudio.

According to its Web site, CenterSpan will immediately shut down the Scour Exchange and relaunch it in 2001 as a "secure and legal" way to distribute all kinds of media. It's all part of CenterSpan's plan to reinvent itself as a "developer and marketer of Internet software applications for communication and collaborative information sharing." But what does the $9 million really buy? One could argue that a P2P file-swapping program isn't that hard to build: A good team of engineers could probably put one together for considerably less than $9 million. (Heck, Napster creator Shawn Fanning did it for nothing.)

But an instantly gained high profile in the online music business isn't necessarily cheap. Suddenly, CenterSpan wants to be an RIAA-approved Napster -- just like every other digital music company (MP3.com, eMusic, LiquidAudio, Listen.com, BMG, EMI and so on) hungrily eyeing Napster's 30 million-plus users. Welcome to the club, CenterSpan! Viewed from that perspective, $9 million may be a small price to pay for membership. -- Janelle Brown [5:45 p.m. PST, Dec. 12, 2000]

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Union yes?

Make note in your PDAs, dot-communists. Jan. 12, 2001, will be a date to remember in the very short history of dot-com labor politics. Customer service workers at Etown in San Francisco will vote on union representation. If the union is voted in, it would make Etown one of the first unionized dot-coms, and the customer service reps would become represented by the Northern California Media Workers Guild/Typographical Union, Local 39521.

The news of the vote came on the same day that Microsoft announced a proposed settlement of its long-standing labor dispute with temp workers, for the sum of $97 million -- about $10,000 a worker. Hmm ... maybe this is what all that talk about the "empowerment" of workers in the new economy really means. -- Katharine Mieszkowski [5:45 p.m. PST, Dec. 12, 2000]

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Motley Fool says less is more

The Motley Fool's Hot Topics newsletter typically includes a multicourse meal of financial advice with contributions from both Motley editors and regular site users. Buy Intel, why Amazon will never die, 15 reasons to purchase Starbucks shares ... But the stock market's doldrums seem to have turned at least one member away from stock accumulation and toward a Walden-esque call for simplicity, simplicity, simplicity.

Today's issue included a mysterious, uncharacteristic gem. Buried beneath the tale of one man who had paid off $10,000 worth of credit card debt since becoming a member of the site -- and just above a "an investment clubber's view of Yahoo" -- the post called for Americans to give up their "more is better" obsession. "Homes, vehicles, TV's, and, yes, waistlines and credit card balances are getting bigger," writes spl241. "Unfortunately, what's shrinking is our time and energy to enjoy our lives."

Amen, brother, preach it! Who -- besides the layoff crowd -- doesn't feel like they're spending too much time at the office these days? But spl241, let's be honest: Your profile at the Motley Fool says that your favorite stocks are Microsoft, Intel and Cisco. Aren't you just trying to soothe your own investment wounds? -- Damien Cave [4 p.m. PST, Dec. 12, 2000]

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Pregnant chads are a girl's best friend

Did you miss out on that eBay auction selling off an authentic Palm Beach butterfly ballot? Are you struggling to find some good election memorabilia? You're in luck! Online jewelry store Enjewel.com has conjured up a line of some of the most wearable kitsch that we've seen in a while: sterling silver chad jewelry.

Yes, for just $125 you too can own your very own "Butterfly Ballot With Hanging Chad" necklace -- an odd-looking sterling silver pendant, shaped more like a bow-tie than a butterfly (in this reporter's humble opinion), with a little square chad popped out and hanging by a tiny silver chain. Or perhaps you would prefer a set of "Pregnant Chad" cuff links or "Dimpled Chad" earrings as the perfect stocking stuffer for the political junkie in your life.

Enthuses Enjewel.com: "Thomas Kurilla fashioned these brushed silver pregnant chad cufflinks as a lifetime reminder of an election none of us will ever forget." Unfortunately, Enjewel.com can't promise that buying the cuff links will bring a swifter conclusion to the election debacle. -- Janelle Brown [3:30 p.m. PST, Dec. 12, 2000]

- - - - - - - - - - - -

Got a tip for the In Box? E-mail us