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Granted, Ms. Love has never been the traditional SUV-driving, cookie-baking kind of mom who posts incredibly detailed stuff about her baby's poops.  But her recent slew of attention-getting Twitter insanity -- and her 19-year-old daughter Frances Bean's mortified response – suggests we are entering a new era of fail, one in which a parent's awkward behavior isn't of the adorable "What's this button do?" variety. Instead, it may be more like "S#&% My Dad Said At Burning Man."

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just like to come here, my checks are on a wierd sahcedule so bear with, per paypal plus my paypal account has had wierd stuff happen eg salaries and theft, so im very persnickity about it, but if i really like it youll get paid , my cpa hates the word"etsy: " but theres vendors on here i adore nd i al;ways discover new inspiring stuff.

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The one thing that struck me about the interview, in all its provocative glory, is what Courtney said about Lady Gaga, one of the few pop stars who is open about her drug use and (more important) hasn't had a narcotics-induced public meltdown yet.

"She may be doing fine at the moment, but I’m worried about her future. She’s very young, and she’s very talented, but she doesn’t seem to have any female friends. Or any straight guy friends for that matter. Instead, she surrounds herself with this coterie of gay stylists and advisors who’ve turned her into this weird, sexless Barbie doll. I was raised by gay guys myself, and I turned out all right in the end. But you know, you can only pull off this meat-dress act for so long. If she doesn’t watch out she’ll turn into a lonely drag queen. Straight guys just aren't in to that kind of thing. "

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See, celebrities have a difficult time with Twitter. On the one hand, it gives them direct access to their fans in a way that was previously impossible, allowing them to promote the very best version of themselves while giving the illusion that they are letting people into their private thoughts and lives. On the other hand, sometimes famous people -- like the rest of us -- forget that there is a difference between thinking something and tweeting it, and end up oversharing some thought or private picture.

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The name change is certainly a bombshell, and given that Love/Michelle broke the news less than a week before the release of Hole's new album, "Nobody's Daughter," it's easy to paint it as nothing more than a publicity move. But it also speaks loudly to what has always fascinated me about Love -- what has, in fact, made it totally impossible for me to join the swelling ranks of those who would vilify or ridicule her.

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Surely our bottomless appetite for the spectacle of attractive, well-compensated people messing up helped create a perfect storm of giving the people what they want. Had any episodes of disoriented staggering around lately, Amy Winehouse? No? How about now? OK, we'll just stand outside rummaging through your garbage until you do.

And so, as we sat at our laptops this year, aggressively hitting the refresh button on TMZ, we waited and watched for our icons to go off their meds, to lose their shit and to generally behave in a manner confounding, larger than life and just plain nuts. They did not disappoint.

Christian Bale

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But Paula brought many things to the show -- a nurturing side, an ability to laugh at herself, a tendency to go terribly off-script, a tabloid sideshow, and a history as a performer, if one who peaked before the reign of Autotune. Now that she's leaving the ratings juggernaut, who will late-night comedians have to push around?

Orly Taitz

At its heart, "American Idol" is nothing more than a classic tale of reinvention. Each season, contestants walk into an audition room as students, wannabes or the best singer in their tiny little town -- and a few months (and several million text messages later), they're sitting at the top of the Billboard charts.

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Apparently, the widow Cobain has been Twittering away about her former fashion designer, Dawn Simorangkir, who claims that the former Hole frontwoman has publicly accused her -- succinctly, in messages of under 140 characters each! -- of being a "nasty, lying, hosebag thief," dealing cocaine, losing custody of her child, and being guilty of assault and burglary. She allegedly also threatened Simorangkir that she would be "hunted til your dead."

A brief search of what is purportedly Love's Twitter feed (though remember for both legal and moral reasons that it's really impossible to determine who writes these things), a longer version of the hosebag comment turns up, and it goes, "stay away well well away, and etsy cant wait tos e the backof her, so goodbye asswipe nasty lying hosebag thief, now for pleasant things."

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The release of "Dirty Blonde" is an occasion to assess, after an absence -- she's not coy about where she's been; it's rehab, no Mariah-style "exhaustion" euphemisms for her -- where Love belongs on the topography of celebrity now. This is not to list her on the silly A-through-D high-school popularity scale that the proliferation of magazines and television shows devoted to the worship of fame have made the lingua franca, but to consider why Love provokes such a strong reaction.

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But no matter. This lunch is like getting to play backgammon with the Buddha, patty-cake with the pope. I'm sitting across from the Man, Rabbi Yehuda Berg, son of Rav and Karen Berg, brother of Michael Berg, who collectively are the ruling family of the Kabbalah Centre -- the world's largest Kabbalah educational center and by extension the direct metaphysical descendants of everything top-secret and superholy in Jewish mysticism. Yehuda Berg is one of the people who busted the gates of secret magic wide open and, in the process, weaned Madonna off the yoga teat and sold her on bottled Kabbalah water and that nifty Hebrew tattoo she sported in her last video.

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"I believe that [the Bush] administration has taken the events of 9/11 and has manipulated the grief of the country and I think that's reprehensible," he told his fellow luminaries in the audience. "I don't think, like many of us, that the reasons we have been given for going to war are the honest reasons.

"If they are saying it's about the fact [that Iraq has] biological weapons and might have nuclear weapons and that gives us the liberty to preempt and strike because we think they might hit us, then what prevents Pakistan from attacking India, what prevents India from attacking Pakistan, what prevents us from going into North Korea?

"I believe -- though I may be wrong because I am no expert -- that this war is about what most wars are about: hegemony, money, power and oil."

What's more, Hoffman said, he suspects most politicians of lying to save their booties most of the time.

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"I never felt the need to name my penis," the newly minted late-night talk-show host tells Maxim magazine.

Then again, he says, "My penis has a name for me. It calls me Jim."

Very imaginative on his penis' part.

But Kimmel gets a little more creative when there's ... um ... action involved. He admits to having come up with a rather unusual expression for pleasuring himself: "rubbing Rob Reiner."

"I made that up, but he doesn't know about it," Kimmel tells the magazine. "So don't tell him."

Wouldn't dream of it, though I'm sure there's a Meathead joke in there somewhere ...

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From the mouths of babes

"I cussed at a lady ... My daughter always said I had a potty mouth."

-- Courtney Love, explaining her recent air-rage arrest at London's Heathrow Airport to the press, upon her release by the police.

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Pool tool

Speaking of rubbing Rob Reiner ...

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Simple and plain, Kurt Cobain was a fuckin' genius.

In its Oct. 28 issue, now on newsstands, Newsweek has published excerpts from "Journals," an upcoming collection of diaries by Cobain, who was simultaneously the messiah, martyr and Pontius Pilate of '90s pop. To say that Cobain expanded the definition of a rock star goes without saying. As Axl Rose was in the process of transforming himself from a menacing thug -- a racist, homophobic one, at that -- into a misunderstood, tender, yet bombastic man whose muse was Elton John, so Cobain made depression and introspection vogue in a way that no singer-songwriter had previously done. A crushing sound with an interesting pop sensibility created the perfect backdrop for Cobain's lyrics, the portrait of a thoughtful, confused and compelling young man with acute difficulty dealing with the pain -- physical, emotional and mental -- in his life.

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They still manage to have a few laughs from time to time. Or so Grohl says.

"As much as Courtney and I dislike each other, the few times that we've bumped into each other in person, we've kind of laughed at how ridiculous it all is," Grohl tells the upcoming issue of Spin magazine.

"The last time we saw each other was at the Reading Festival a couple of years ago, from the side of the stage," Grohl recalls. "We glared at each other, and I just laughed. I thought, 'This is so stupid.'"

In other words, he's not foo' enough to fight her.

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Mother knows best?

"Calista [Flockhart] will make my son a great wife."

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Amber Valentine and Edgar Livergood, aka Jucifer, hail from the vaunted indie-rock breeding ground of Athens, Ga. Much like current industry darlings the White Stripes, Jucifer is a two-person outfit trying to reinvigorate the stale world of rock music with lots of noise while staying as far away from technological gimmicks as possible. The liner notes to "I Name You Destroyer" specify that the album was "recorded without pro tools, loops, samples, studio musicians, big shots or lackeys" and the music bears out their claim: "I Name You Destroyer" is vivid, rough and ready rock 'n' roll.

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Despite the fact that the Smoking Gun published the actual paperwork from Lopez's people insisting that the star be given dee-luxe (all-white) accommodations for her very brief appearance on the "What's Going On" video benefiting the Sept. 11 Fund, Lopez herself says it don't mean a thing.

"First of all, being involved in something like that is a total thing where you do it out of the goodness of your heart," Lopez sniffed to TV Guide Online. "So I think people enjoy a little bit the idea of me misbehaving, but I'm a professional. [That's] not my style. If you really want to check it out ... don't ask Internet gossip pages or whatever. Get the information from the right people and you'll get a different picture -- the truth!"

Smoking Gun mastermind Bill Bastone finds Lopez's vehement denial somewhat mystifying.

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