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Scandal: Fox cancels Joan Rivers for Palin insult!

Wed, 19 Jan 2011 19:20:00 +0000

Was Joan Rivers uninvited from Fox News for insulting Sarah Palin? Yes. Probably. PAGING ANDREW SULLIVAN.

Rivers was booked on Fox -- presumably "Fox & Friends" -- to promote an upcoming reality program. Then, over the weekend, she called Sarah Palin "stupid," into a video camera, because TMZ asked Joan Rivers what she thought about Sarah Palin, and that was the inevitable response. Before calling her "stupid," Rivers issued the following blood libel: "I think Sarah Palin is an amazing woman. I think she represents everything strong a woman can be, and I think she should go someplace -- to another planet, to show them, and get out of our face." So much for civility!

Then, Rivers writes on Twitter, she got the call: "As a result, our appearance on the Fox News Channel tomorrow morning has been cancelled. Outcome: DON'T PISS OFF SARAH PALIN. She’s apparently 'very powerful,' and is obviously still smarting from the end of her reality show."

Joan Rivers gets her (scary) close-up

Thu, 10 Jun 2010 00:20:00 +0000

Crushed by the hostile London reviews of what at first looked like a hit show -- her autobiographical play, "Joan Rivers: A Work in Progress by a Life in Progress" -- the veteran comedian takes a moment to explain something to the documentary filmmakers who've been following her around. Say what you like about her comedy, she says; she doesn't care. (This is Rivers-rhetoric and as such completely not true, but never mind.) But if you say she's no good as an actress, you have wounded her. "My whole career is an actress' career," she says in that distinctive Brooklyn-Jewish growl. "I'm an actress who plays a comedian."

It's a revealing remark and staged as such, but like so much in Ricki Stern and Annie Sundberg's riveting documentary, "Joan Rivers: A Piece of Work," it raises more questions than it answers. Because Rivers the actress -- born 77 years ago this week as Joan Alexandra Molinsky, the daughter of Russian immigrants -- isn't just playing any comedian. She's playing Joan Rivers, an undigested, gristly lump of misanthropy and female self-hatred who has built a career out of shamelessness, uncensored bad taste and a strange combination of starfucking and utter contempt. (Also, just to be clear, out of her exquisite comic timing and her mental agility.) If this is just a role, it's the performance of a lifetime, and more convincing than Olivier playing Hamlet.

Tribeca: 20 films to catch at N.Y.’s spring showcase

Thu, 22 Apr 2010 01:01:00 +0000

When the Tribeca Film Festival was launched in 2002, co-founders Robert De Niro, Jane Rosenthal and Craig Hatkoff talked a good game about rebuilding downtown Manhattan in the wake of the 9/11 attacks. As has been documented here and elsewhere, they clearly had a business objective in mind as well. Their initial goal -- to build a New York spring film festival on a global par with Cannes, Sundance, Berlin and Venice -- has clearly not been reached. On balance, I don't think that's a bad thing.

Now in its ninth year, Tribeca has something it lacked for many of its first eight: an identity. Granted, it's a miscellaneous identity, and Tribeca isn't the world's greatest festival in any of its categories (except perhaps its ESPN tie-in sports film festival, an ingenious and successful enterprise). But TFF has become a major spring cultural event for New Yorkers and tourists precisely through its variety. Once again this year, head programmer David Kwok offers a couple of big-ticket premieres ("Shrek Forever After," the opening gala, and the anthology documentary "Freakonomics" as the festival-closer), a smattering of American independent films that either did or didn't play Sundance, a strong documentary lineup, and a cherry-picked list of intriguing foreign films that even Manhattanites may never get another chance to see.

Should Orly Taitz replace Paula Abdul?

Wed, 05 Aug 2009 16:06:00 +0000

No one can replace Paula Abdul entirely. And let's be honest: Would anyone want to? The famously incoherent "American Idol" judge became a national punch line for her train-wreck tangents and sputtering, new age nonsense: "You stood in your truth" won't be the catchphrase of any summer.

But Paula brought many things to the show -- a nurturing side, an ability to laugh at herself, a tendency to go terribly off-script, a tabloid sideshow, and a history as a performer, if one who peaked before the reign of Autotune. Now that she's leaving the ratings juggernaut, who will late-night comedians have to push around?

Orly Taitz

At its heart, "American Idol" is nothing more than a classic tale of reinvention. Each season, contestants walk into an audition room as students, wannabes or the best singer in their tiny little town -- and a few months (and several million text messages later), they're sitting at the top of the Billboard charts.

TV’s queen bitch

Wed, 22 Jan 2003 21:00:00 +0000

Last night it occurred to me that if anyone deserves their own reality show, it's Melissa and Joan Rivers. This stroke of genius hit me while I was watching a live edition of E!'s "Fashion Police" the day after the Golden Globe Awards. Joan and Melissa possess a certain quality that has until now been missing from reality sitcoms: seething familial resentment, clear evidence of childhood trauma and utterly mismatched opponents.

That's what would set my show, "The Rivers," apart. (I know it's not grammatical, but who's going to produce a show called "The Riverses"?) You'd have none of the palpable affection of "The Osbournes," none of the zonked-out detachment of "The Anna Nicole Show," none of the cheerful self-deprecation of "Star Dates." Instead, you'd get the unadulterated pleasure of watching Melissa gamely try to keep things clean, vapid and obsequious as her mother lets fly increasingly revolting and mortifying remarks just so she can watch her daughter's face twist into a mask of pure hatred. The cattiness was kept to a disappointing minimum during the E! fashion wrap-up, except when it came to each other. Then Joan and Melissa proved that they really are a Jean-Paul Sartre play waiting to happen.

The week in dirt

Thu, 28 Mar 2002 21:22:00 +0000

Amy Reiter, who writes Salon's Nothing Personal column, dishes highlights from the column every week on Salon Audio.

This week it's all about red carpet nastiness at the Oscars. Is Peter Fonda bucking to be the next Joan Rivers? Plus: Why Will and Jada Smith should get a Parenting Award, why stick figure Kate Moss suddenly eats for two, and more.

No swimsuit? No lawsuit

Tue, 25 Sep 2001 22:02:00 +0000

Celebrity responses to the attacks on the U.S. are getting a little stranger.

Celine Dion and her husband Rene Angelil, for instance, are showing their respect for the victims by dropping their $5 million lawsuit against the Quebec tabloid magazine that claimed that the couple was big into nudity.

Angelil has told the Canadian press that he and his wife (who emerged from retirement to sing "God Bless America" on Friday's telethon) have reexamined their priorities in light of the terrorist attacks. And after much thought, the couple apparently has decided going to court to refute Allo-Vedette's report that they have a proclivity for nude sunbathing and skinny-dipping -- allegations they strenuously deny -- is not high on their list.

Then again, if they'd won the suit, they could have donated the money to the victims of the attack and their families ...

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Still dealing with her own stuff

"In light of recent personal events I feel that, for the sake of myself and my family, a short time out of the spotlight would be beneficial."

The week in dirt

Tue, 24 Apr 2001 21:01:00 +0000

Amy Reiter, who writes Salon's Nothing Personal column, dishes highlights from the column every week on Salon Audio.

This week: Smells like ... Joan Rivers! Plus: Why Tommy Lee and Pamela Anderson didn't pan out, and how Sharon Stone's beaver ended up on PETA's Worst Dressed list.

Darling, you scent me

Mon, 23 Apr 2001 16:56:00 +0000

If you're like most people, you've often stopped in the middle of your workday and asked yourself, "Gee, I wonder what Joan Rivers smells like?"

Oh, sure, we all know she herself has a particularly acute sniffer, leading her to gripe about the personal hygiene habits of stars like Russell Crowe. But what kind of waft does the fashion-focused lady give off herself?

Now Rivers has answered this age-old question by introducing her new perfume: Now & Forever.

At an intimate kickoff held last week in Rivers' own deeee-luxe New York apartment (gilding, dog sculptures, skinny-legged silk settees ...), I took a spritz on the wrist for the sake of us all.

And? Not at all the grandmotherly Emeraude-ish scent I expected. Lighter. Very floral. A slightly more sophisticated version of the Lily of the Valley perfume my sister favored in high school.

According to the press materials, "It had to be totally modern, yet truly timeless, so that it would capture Joan's sense of optimism ... for now and forever."

Britney vs. Christina: Sticky star war?

Thu, 29 Mar 2001 20:16:00 +0000

Apparently what a girl wants is to get Coked up and take on her rival.

Not content to let Britney Spears recast the Pepsi generation in her own image and dance away with all the spoils, Christina Aguilera has reportedly signed on to hawk Coca-Cola in the United States and South America. Although a Coke spokesman told the BBC that "the details are still being worked out," the British tabloids are reporting that Aguilera stands to make big bucks on the deal, although not quite as big as Spears has on her whopping Pepsi payday.

"The gloves have come off. It's a fizzical battle no one will want to miss," one "ad insider" quipped to the U.K. Daily Star on Wednesday. (I guess that's how ad insiders talk.)

But while Aguilera is clearly going after Britney's claim to the "princess of pop" tiara, whether or not she's looking to win over Spears' Pepsi costar Bob Dole is another matter altogether.

Pop an extra Viagra, Mr. Dole? Easy, boy.

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Julia pooh-poohs politics

"Political about what? Mad-cow disease?"

Blue Glow

Fri, 25 Aug 2000 18:03:00 +0000

Series

New guy Dan accompanies O-Town to Germany on Making the Band (9:30 p.m. Fri., ABC). La Femme Nikita (8 p.m. Sun., USA) ceases production with the final two parts of its series finale. In part two (8 p.m.), Madeline is in hot water when the escaped Nikita can't be found. In part three (10 p.m.), the Section's methods over the past four years are reviewed. The X-Files (9 p.m. Sun., Fox) repeats the two-parter where Mulder finally discovers what really happened to his sister. True Hollywood Story (9 p.m. Sun., E!) goes behind the scenes on "All in the Family"; those were the days and some of 'em weren't pretty. Charlotte discovers Trey's flaw on the eve of their wedding on Sex and the City (9 p.m. Sun. HBO).

Specials

Blue Glow

Fri, 24 Mar 2000 17:00:00 +0000

Series

Backstreet Boys wannabes from around the country audition to become the next boy band thing in Making the Band (9 p.m. Fri., ABC), a new series from the creators of "The Real World" that could turn into the (extremely) guilty pleasure of the season. Chris Carter's sci-fi series Harsh Realm (9 p.m. Fri., FX), which aired for only a couple of weeks on Fox, moves to FX, which will run the remaining never-aired episodes. Scott Bairstow stars as a soldier caught in a virtual reality war game. Academy Award nominee Michael Caine is interviewed on Dateline NBC (9 p.m. Fri., NBC). In case you missed it last week, the first episode of The Beat (9 p.m. Sun., UPN), a cop show from Tom Fontana and Barry Levinson of "Homicide" fame, has another showing. It's no "Homicide," but the two leads (Mark Ruffalo and Derek Cecil) grow on you. On The Sopranos (9 p.m. Sun., HBO), Uncle Junior has a new girlfriend (uh-oh) and Tony goes legit until the heat dies down. Bill Maher hosts a post-Oscars Politically Incorrect After Party (check local listings, Sun., ABC), with guests Chris Isaak, Arsenio Hall and Mr. Movie Fone, among others.

Specials

Will success spoil Janeane Garofalo?

Wed, 26 Jan 2000 17:00:00 +0000

I'm worried about Janeane Garofalo.

No, I'm not a crazed stalker with pictures of her taped to the insides of my cabinets who is freaked out because she changed her hair or something. Heck, judging by the fact that I can hardly remember half of the movies she's been in, I'm not even a legitimate die-hard fan.

But I do like Janeane, as an actress and as a person -- well, as a persona, anyway -- and that's why I'm worried about her recently announced deal with HBO to star in her own sitcom. Although I'm excited at the prospect of ingesting regular televised doses of Garofalo -- her new show will likely push me to finally subscribe to HBO -- it's difficult to imagine her carrying her own series. She's unquestionably capable. (Hell, if Norm Macdonald can have a prime-time network presence, Garofalo certainly can.) It's just that she's always been more Elaine than Jerry, cracking us up from the sidelines and leaving us begging for more.

It's her seemingly infinite number of roles as the sardonic second fiddle that gives me that impression: She's played everyone's tough yet sympathetic best friend. Garofalo is the perennial outsider. Her humor is based on her being just left of the center of attention. This is a woman who named her production company I Hate Myself Productions. We can identify with her.

And now a word from our readers

Fri, 24 Dec 1999 17:00:00 +0000

A few weeks ago, here in this very column, I put before you a tasty array of questions. And faster than Jason Priestley can say, "I swear I wasn't drunk, Your Honor," the answers started rolling in.

My suspicions are confirmed: You guys are a bunch of sick twists. And so, without further ado, I bring you the 1999 Nothing Personal Readers' Choice Awards.

1) The celebrity you deem most likely to have named a body part:

The winner is ... Celeb: Mike Myers. Part: Schlong. Moniker: "Mini Me."

Honorable mentions: Sylvester "Rocky" Stallone's cojones: "Pebbles," Marilyn Manson's breasts: "Publicity" and "Stunt," Ricky Martin's booty: "Dinero," Monica Lewinsky's privates: "Humidor," Mick Jagger's lips: "IMAX."

2) The celebrity you'd most like to have make your dreams come true:

The winner (at least the weirdest) is ... The Rev. Jerry Falwell: "My recurring dream is that Jerry Falwell has undergone male to female transexual surgery. The new Falwell changes his, I mean her, name to the Divine Reverend Ms. J and holds a press conference to tell the world that during a previous life she was the Ms. J. who wrote the Bible."