Curiously, this would put the Lebanese government under the umbrella of “not having a clue” about what constitutes anti-Catholicism, according to Catholic League President Bill Donahue. The chapter refused to condemn Gaga’s “Judas” –most likely in an attempt to not bring any more publicity to the song than it had to – by saying it was a “mess” but, “if anyone thinks the Catholic League is going to go ballistic over Lady Gaga’s latest contribution, they haven’t a clue about what really constitutes anti-Catholicism.”

Seeing as how 39 percent of Lebanon identifies itself as Catholic and only 23 percent of Americans do, the American Catholic League might not get the final say on this one. We’re still waiting to hear back from the Vatican on its official response to Gaga.

“She may be doing fine at the moment, but I’m worried about her future. She’s very young, and she’s very talented, but she doesn’t seem to have any female friends. Or any straight guy friends for that matter. Instead, she surrounds herself with this coterie of gay stylists and advisors who’ve turned her into this weird, sexless Barbie doll. I was raised by gay guys myself, and I turned out all right in the end. But you know, you can only pull off this meat-dress act for so long. If she doesn’t watch out she’ll turn into a lonely drag queen. Straight guys just aren’t in to that kind of thing. “

It’s true that Gaga’s main difference from Madonna is her desexualization; she does resemble a drag queen onstage more than a female pop star. And that’s a large part of her appeal among her young gay fan base, who look to her as a sign that anyone can be “born this way” and still loved for who they are.

But anyone who knows Gaga’s history also knows she’s admitted to being bisexual and was, up until recently, dating a bartender/diet book author named Luc Carl. She’s admitted to working out her issues with her relationship through song, and there is a rejection of our culturally accepted ideas of femininity in that. But she’s in no way “sexless,” and as was evidenced in last week’s “Saturday Night Live” short “3-Way,” Gaga has no problem taking off the makeup and being a girl.

I doubt she’ll end up a “lonely drag queen” just because she’s a gay male icon. What do you think?

It didn’t take long for the frenzy over the long-awaited album, combined with the irresistible allure of getting something for next to nothing, to take hold. The puny strength of Amazon’s digital service was soon no match for the demand of Gaga’s army. Frustrated fans experienced delays and flat-out failures to download. By lunchtime, Amazon was understatedly tweeting, “We’re currently experiencing very high volume. If you order today, you will get the full @ladygaga album for $.99. Thanks for your patience.” Patience? On the Internet? You’re joking, right?

In direct proportion to the slowness of Amazon’s servers was the speed of the discontent. Angry fans were soon barraging Amazon with complaints about the “Monster FAIL” “drama” and “the entire ‘gravity’ of the situation … for some people it’s been hours.” And they didn’t limit them to the Amazon feedback area either; they were doling out one-star reviews for the album itself, saying they’d been “ripped-off,” “screwed,” and that “This experience is horrible” and a “waste of 99 cents.”

As a Gaga fan ever in search of exhausting new BPMs to push me through my morning run, I too eagerly forked over my buck on Monday. And yes, it was a hassle. The experience was also tainted by Amazon’s repeated entreaties for me to try their new cloud drive — for future reference, no means no, Amazon. Getting the songs took hours. Three of them, including “You and I,” a song I fell in love with a freaking year ago, refused to download at all. I had to restart my computer and download them one at time, over the course of several hours, to finally get the whole album. Dear God, the agony. I haven’t been this furious since the New York Times decided to make us pay for content – after those first free five stories a day.

The bottom line is that if you’re going to offer something, you absolutely should be prepared to deliver on it. But maybe it’s because I’m old enough to remember the time when I had to leave my house to purchase music and an album might be an investment of 16 bucks, I’m not ready to voice disapproval of an album because I had a bad experience obtaining it. There’s a distinction between service and content. And the expectation that everything should be free or nearly free, and immediately accessible, just simply isn’t always realistic. Sometimes the server will be slow. Sometimes an album will set you back the price of a whole can of Coke. And if outrage were currency, I wouldn’t want to blow my whole budget on something that’s only worth a buck anyway. Hate the cloud, not the Gaga.

Amazon, meanwhile, demonstrating either a great attempt at customer reparations or spectacular foolhardiness, is taking another whack at it today, repeating its 99-cent offer. Predictably, users are already noting problems again, and trouble getting the download button to appear. And as one user agonized Thursday morning, this whole nightmare just “doesn’t seem fair.”