Blame Obamacare and abortion. We heard, early out of the gate, from Mike Huckabee, who didn’t wait for the funerals to start blaming the liberal banishment of God from schools and government, including “tax-funded abortion pills,” by which the Personhood proponent meant birth control. “We dismiss the notion of natural law and the notion that there are moral absolutes and seemed amazed when some kids make it their own morality to kill innocent children. We diminish and even hold in contempt the natural family of a father and mother creating and then responsibly raising the next generation and then express dismay that kids feel no real connection to their families or even the concept of a family.”

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In response to those remarks, Perkins went on Mike Huckabee's radio show and said that "we are pursuing everything possible to deal with him because he is out of control."

Perkins continued:

"And the truth of the matter is, let's just be very, very truthful, and that's what we deal in is the truth, that even if society embraced homosexuality, there would never be that sense of self-fulfillment because it's outside the way God created man and woman. And that's the bottom line. They cannot erase that, even if they get every law on the books changed, it will never change that."

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"It was a planned, coordinated, orchestrated attack led by terrorists, terrorists, Bill," Huckabee said. "And this White House has to explain why it hasn’t owned up to that. Why it can’t say it ... Let's go back. Richard Nixon was forced out of office because he lied. And because he covered some stuff up. I'm going to be blunt and tell you this. Nobody died in Watergate. We have people who are dead because of this. There are questions to be answered and Americans ought to demand to get answers."

Via ThinkProgress.

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He was there to give the evangelical seal of approval, a couple of years after he engaged in some casual Mormon-baiting. "Of the four people on the two tickets, the only self-professed evangelical is Barack Obama," a bizarre statement, since so far as I can see Obama never called himself that, "and he supports changing the definition of marriage, believes that human life is disposable and expendable at any time in the womb or even beyond the womb, and tells people of faith that they must bow their knees to the god of government and violate their faith and conscience in order to comply with what he calls health care." (The "even beyond the womb" refers to the antiabortion obsession with accusing Obama of voting for infanticide as a state senator, a claim Politifact rated "pants on fire.")

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"Tampa has been such a wonderful and hospitable city to us," Huckabee said. "The only hitch in an otherwise perfect week was the awful noise coming from the hotel room next door to mine. Turns out it was just Debbie Wasserman Schultz practicing her speech for the DNC in Charlotte next week. Bless her heart."

In a statement, Wasserman Schultz's national press secretary, Melanie Roussell, replied to the former Arkansas governor and Fox News host's insult:

 Perhaps Mr. Huckabee should pay more attention to the company he keeps, such as Todd Akin, instead of taking potshots at the Chairwoman for applause lines. While Huckabee continues to promote the extreme Akin plank, the Chair will defend women's rights to reproductive health free from dictation by men who don't know fundamental biology.

 

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Suffice to say, it's been a strange week. How did we all get in this side dish of pickles anyway? It started last month, after Chick-fil-A president Dan Cathy came out of the closet as officially "guilty as charged" on the matter of his beliefs about "biblical marriage" (unsurprising from a guy whose WinShape organization has thrown millions at anti-gay groups). After that got out, the company quickly found itself the unlikely center of a storm over either basic human rights or decent American values, depending on how people spin it. Next, cleverly capitalizing on the brouhaha, former presidential contender, Fox News host and carrot-raisin salad aficionado Mike Huckabee decreed via Facebook that August 1 should be a national day of honoring our values and the people who best represent them. A Martin Luther King Jr. Day with nuggets, if you will. And so, Chick-fil-A Appreciation Day was born. On Wednesday, crowds hungry for coleslaw and good old-fashioned heterosexuality lined up in droves to show their support for the chain. Morals were affirmed; tiny packets of fat-free honey mustard dressing were opened. Indoctrination was avoided.

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The Family Leader, whose leader Bob Vander Plaats spoke at the event, already had its own "social issues" forum a few weeks ago. And before that, there was plenty of anti-choice red meat at Sen. Jim DeMint's, R-S.C., forum. But none of that abundant genuflecting to values voters sufficed -- it wasn't enough to erase the massive sense of grievance the candidates were clearly trying to mobilize.

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“Gov. Romney wants to fix Social Security. He doesn’t want to abolish it or end it,” Pawlenty said. “Gov. Perry has said in the past that he thought it was ‘failed.’”

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Over the course of the past few months and even years, God has sent signs and direct messages to each of these candidates encouraging them to run, presumably without telling them that he supports other candidates as well.

God may have further hedged his bets too. According to BuzzFlash, "Tim Pawlenty's 28-year-old wunderkind of a campaign manager, acknowledged that before he joined Team Pawlenty, he "prayed deeply" over his future path. Ayers concluded that God had "called" him "to a higher purpose," and that higher purpose is leading Pawlenty to victory in November 2012.

Meanwhile, God reportedly made it very clear that he didn't want Mike Huckabee to be president, "lest he take his focus off the much more important task of producing a series of conservative American history DVDs," reports Amira.

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Cain, the former CEO of Godfather's Pizza (and head of the restaurant industry's lobbying organization), has been unfairly written off as an unserious candidates by the elites, because he's never won an election to anything before and he's very silly. But GOP voters have caught Cain fever. After Frank Luntz's focus group almost unanimously declared Cain the "winner" of the May 5 South Carolina debate, Cain took the Georgia Republican Party convention by storm and won the Tea Party Fort Lauderdale straw poll. As Tea Party Fort Lauderdale goes, so goes Tea Party West Des Moines.

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"Governor Huckabee will announce tomorrow night on his program whether or not he intends to explore a presidential bid," Woody Fraser, the show's executive producer, said. "He has not told anyone at Fox News Channel his decision."

The key word in that statement may be "explore." As Taegan Goddard pointed out earlier, it would be legally problematic if Huckabee were to use his Fox News platform to formally declare a presidential candidacy. But he could probably get away with saying that he's decided to leave the show and that he'll be looking into the possibility of maybe eventually launching a 2012 campaign.

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I know this will be nearly impossible to believe, especially when the mugger in the "DISCO" shirt shows up less than 30 seconds in, but this does not appear to be a joke:

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The role of American evangelical Christians in popularizing anti-LGBT sentiment in Uganda and working directly with the religious leaders responsible for this bill has been explored at length since the bill was introduced in 2009. Many American religious right groups have belatedly distanced themselves from their former allies, but it seems like the damage has already been done.

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It was against this backdrop that Huckabee, the old Baptist preacher, delivered a rousing, emotionally powerful speech aimed straight at the hearts of the (many) cultural conservatives in the crowd. He saved abortion for the end, reminding attendees that "we are a people of life." Then he slowly launched into a story about a visit to Israel that he'd taken with his daughter when she was 11 years old. At the end of a tour of Yad Vashem, the Holocaust museum in Jerusalem, Huckabee told the crowd:

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The world must see bin Laden roasting in the lake of fire, in order to discourage future would-be terrorists from taking up arms against us. How can Americans feel any sense of closure, at all, without the image of the al-Qaida leader suffering eternal torment at the hands of the devil? Until we have definitive evidence of bin Laden weeping and gnashing his teeth for all eternity, tortured forever by the Beast, we will never prove to those conspiratorial and superstitious Muslims that he has been punished for his wicked deeds.

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Huck struck back with an entertaining, unedited blog post calling Beck a conspiracy theorist looking for "boogey men" that "he and only he can see." "The First Lady's approach is about personal responsibility," Huckabee wrote, "not the government literally taking candy from a baby's mouth."

On the Blaze, Beck's news website, Kevin Balfe, Beck's primary ghostwriter, has responded today by calling Huckabee a liar. Because, he argues, Michelle Obama and Mike Huckabee do want to literally take candy from babies' mouths:

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Huckabee's crime? He supports Michelle Obama's anti-obesity initiative, because modern-day culture-warrior right-wingers do actually think encouraging healthy behavior for children is an infringement on liberty. And because of that suppot, Huckabee is clearly a left-wing Nazi Progressive -- "like John McCain" -- who conspired with McCain to ... sabotage the Romney campaign, in 2008. (???)

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Not all of the potential presidential candidates tell bad jokes. I don't think Ron Paul tells any jokes (the rEVOLution is nothing to laugh at!), thank god. Mike Huckabee is actually charming and funny, with a natural sense of timing, as you can see in this clip from a 2004 Republican Governors Association meeting, in which he does a passable God-themed Bob Newhart telephone routine. (But sometimes his ad-libs are a bit questionable! And other times the p.c, police can't handle some harmless gun violence-themed campaign humor.)

But my favorite presidential jokesters -- the two wackiest cards on the campaign trail -- are former governors Tim Pawlenty, R-Yuksville, and Mitt Romney, R-Laffsachusetts. Let's start with Tim:

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But look at who's ahead of him:

Huckabee 19%
Trump 19% (+9)
Palin 12%
Gingrich 11% (-3)
Romney 11% (-7)
Paul 7% (-1)
Bachmann 5% (+5)
Daniels 3%
Pawlenty 2% (-1)
Santorum 2% (-1)
Barbour * (-1)

Mike Huckabee would have a serious shot at winning the GOP nomination if he actually ran. If! There is not very much evidence, though, that he wants to. He might've met with some donors, in order to gauge how much support he'd get from the major finance people if he ran (and if history is any indication, the answer is "not much"), but on the whole there is very little to indicate a presidential campaign organizing itself around him.

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