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Must-see morning clip: Colbert on over-the-counter Plan B

Thu, 02 May 2013 13:13:00 +0000

The FDA, which apparently stands for the "Fornication Distribution Agenda" is "handing out hussy pills to 15-year-old girls" and Stephen Colbert is outraged:

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Must-see morning clip: Jon Stewart on Syria’s chemical weapons

Wed, 01 May 2013 13:30:00 +0000

Jon Stewart attempts to understand if Syria has crossed the "red line" of consequences for the U.S., but can't seem to get a straight answer:

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Must-see morning clip: Jon Hamm announces marriage to Aasif Mandvi

Tue, 30 Apr 2013 13:30:00 +0000

"Mad Men" actor Jon Hamm talked season six on last night's "Daily Show," in which "Freaks and Geeks" star Linda Cardellini guest-stars as his new love interest. Cardellini's, aka Lindsay Weir's, presence on set was kept under wraps to prevent the Internet from exploding before the episode aired. "I remember her as a junior, senior in high school," said Jon Stewart. "Because of DVR I remember from, like, 6 months ago. And then you turn it on and you're like, 'Did she travel to space? How did she age ten years?' "

Hamm also plugged his upcoming movie with "Daily Show" correspondent Aasif Mandvi, "Million Dollar Arm," set in India, which serves as a convenient backdrop for their upcoming marriage.

Must-see morning clip: “60 Minutes” investigates the Boston bombings

Mon, 29 Apr 2013 13:13:00 +0000

Boston Police Commissioner Ed Davis sat with "60 Minutes'" Scott Pelley to discuss the rapid response to the Boston bombing. They identified the Tsarnaevs as suspects by isolating "people who didn't seem surprised" in camera footage of the scene.

The program also interviews friends of the Tsarnaev brothers:

Must-see morning clip: Inside the Bush library and museum

Fri, 26 Apr 2013 13:29:00 +0000

Jon Stewart takes a look at the George W. Bush Presidential Library and Museum, "the Hard Rock Cafe of catastrophic policy decisions":

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Must-see morning clip: Jon Stewart interviews Egyptian satirist Bassem Youssef

Thu, 25 Apr 2013 13:30:00 +0000

Honored this week as an attendee the Time 100 gala, Egyptian satirist Bassem Youssef stopped by "The Daily Show" to discuss the Egyptian government's attempts to censor his comedy. "They're insecure, they are locked up into their teenage years. They still have pimples and have to deal with their body hair," he said.

Youssef, who was arrested for "denigrating Islam," "spreading false news" and "diminishing the president's stature," was released on bail earlier this month. His case attracted international attention, however, as activists cited the arrest as one of the greatest free speech infringements by the Mohamed Morsi's government since he came to power.

Must-see morning clip: “Choose your own adventure” at the Bush presidential library

Wed, 24 Apr 2013 13:28:00 +0000

Although he's not invited to Thursday's dedication of the George W. Bush Presidential Library, Stephen Colbert is excited for the memorial, which displays 43,000 artifacts and 200 million e-mails that "could have almost 18 non-redacted words."

The library also "includes interactive role-playing," says Colbert, "where the president hands over the reins of power to someone else--just like he did when he was president. It's like a presidential 'Choose Your Own Adventure.'"

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Must-see morning clip: Jon Stewart rips CNN’s Boston coverage

Tue, 23 Apr 2013 13:19:00 +0000

"If there's one thing you can say for this network, it's that they were there," Jon Stewart said dubiously about CNN's chaotic news coverage of the manhunt in Boston last week.

When other networks switched over to news anchors, CNN stayed on the scene in Watertown, Mass., despite having no news to report:

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Must-see morning clip: Visiting the 9/11 museum

Mon, 22 Apr 2013 13:26:00 +0000

"60 Minutes'" Lesley Stahl went underground, 7 stories below ground zero at the tip of Manhattan, to give audiences a detailed look at the 9/11 museum, which is still being constructed.

"I think any American that walks into this space is going to feel the emotion," she told 60 Minutes Overtime. "It's church-like. I felt the same feelings you feel in a cathedral," she said.

On what you will experience inside:

"First of all, you're going to be thrust back. You're going to hear voices of people talking about what they were doing at that moment because all of us remember what we were doing at that moment. And then you're going to see all the faces--3,000 faces--and it's overwhelming to see the array of people."

Must-see morning clip: Stephen Colbert parodies “Accidental Racist”

Thu, 18 Apr 2013 12:55:00 +0000

Inspired by Brad Paisley and LL Cool J's musical atrocity, "Accidental Racist," Stephen Colbert composed a song of his own: "Oopsie-Daisy Homophobe." Actor and LGBT activist Alan Cumming takes on LL Cool J's part:

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Must-see morning clip: Colbert pays tribute to Boston Marathoners

Wed, 17 Apr 2013 13:23:00 +0000

"The Colbert Report," returning from day off on Monday night, addressed the Boston Marathon bombing a day later with one of the most positive and funny opening monologues on late night television this week. "Whoever did this did not know about the people of Boston," says host Stephen Colbert. He continued:

"A people so tough, they had to buckle their goddamn hats on. It is the cradle of the American revolution. A city that withstood an 86-year losing streak. A city that made it through the Big Dig, a construction project that backed up traffic for 16 years (I mean, there are commuters just getting home now)."

Calling the person(s) who perpetrated the bombings "cowards," Colbert explains that Boston will not be terrorized: "They attacked the Boston Marathon. An event celebrating people who run 26 miles on their day off until their nipples are raw for fun."

Must-see morning clip: Hunting Joseph Kony

Mon, 15 Apr 2013 13:14:00 +0000

A crew from CBS's "60 Minutes" joined a Ugandan tracking team on a mission is to find and capture warlord Joseph Kony, who is responsible for building one of the largest child armies in history. U.S. involvement in the mission is part of a broader goal to disband an emerging threat of terrorism in Africa, reports Lara Logan:

Must-see morning clip: Anthony Weiner gears for a comeback

Thu, 11 Apr 2013 13:22:00 +0000

Former Rep. Anthony Weiner is considering a mayoral run for New York. Cue the obligatory sex jokes, à la "The Colbert Report":

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Must-see morning clip: Sodomy, zygotes and welfare

Wed, 10 Apr 2013 13:15:00 +0000

In Tennessee, one state senator proposes cutting welfare for families that have students with poor grades. Kansas declares that life begins at fertilization.

Jon Stewart has a field day:

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Must-see morning clip: Stephen Colbert gets Bill Clinton on Twitter

Tue, 09 Apr 2013 13:12:00 +0000

"I'm insecure. What if you tweet, and nobody tweets back?" asked former president Bill Clinton on a special episode of "The Colbert Report" last night. "There's nothing worse than a friendless tweeter wandering around in cyberspace."

Colbert then created a Twitter account for Clinton with the handle PrezBillyJeff, and the two constructed his first tweet:

[embedtweet id="320644561439436800"]

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Must-see morning clip: Newtown victims call for gun control

Mon, 08 Apr 2013 13:19:00 +0000

Four months after the horrific massacre at Sandy Hook Elementary School, "60 Minutes'" Scott Pelley interviewed the parents of the children shot dead, who advocated specific reforms to gun control: limiting the size of the magazines, requiring universal background checks and improving our mental health system.

Must-see morning clip: SNL’s Kim Jong Un okays same-sex marriage

Sun, 07 Apr 2013 13:05:00 +0000

On Saturday Night Live, Kim Jong Un (played by Bobby Moynihan) made two major announcements. First, the reopening of North Korea's nuclear facility to enable the ("glorious") production of nuclear weapons. Secondly, the Supreme Leader has decided to lift the country's ban on same sex marriage -- having seen the unhappiness of his gay nephew (since executed, not for homosexuality, but for hosting a weekly book group). Watch below:

Must-see morning clip: Stephen Colbert introduces “six degrees of humping bacon”

Thu, 04 Apr 2013 13:12:00 +0000

Rep. Louie Gohmert, R-Texas, puzzled a lot of people when he concluded that gay marriage could lead to beastiality. Thankfully, Stephen Colbert was able to break down Gohmert's sophisticated logic into terms the rest of America could understand: "Six degrees of humping bacon."

Double entendres ensue:

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Must-see morning clip: Jon Stewart on rising tensions between North Korea and U.S.

Wed, 03 Apr 2013 13:12:00 +0000

Jon Stewart has a message for North Korea: "Your war-mongering's a little retro," mocking Supreme Leader Kim Jong Un's binoculars and the North Korean army's training exercises.

"Look, I don't know if you know this," says Stewart, "but we've moved on from that Patton thing. War is a little more modern, now."

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Must-see morning clip: John Oliver learns that guns are victims, too

Tue, 02 Apr 2013 13:20:00 +0000

"The Daily Show" correspondent John Oliver interviews gun activist Charles Heller, who is protecting guns from people in Arizona. When shown the above photo of guns being destroyed, Heller told Oliver, "That one makes me think of what happened to the Warsaw ghetto in 1943."

Oliver responded dryly, "That is definitely not overstating it."

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