That isn’t to say he doesn’t make some valid points. With the help of a mountain of data, he argues that money, fame and success are no guarantee for happiness — or, as P. Diddy once opined, “Mo’ money, mo’ problems.” It’s the quality of one’s personal relationships, of course, that has a stronger link to personal happiness. Brooks lays out the evidence: “The daily activities most associated with happiness are sex, socializing after work and having dinner with others” and “being married produces a psychic gain equivalent to more than $100,000 a year.” (Note that in the same column he underscores that ”the relationship between money and well-being is complicated.”) I look at this evidence and see proof of the importance of having all sorts of strong relationships — with friends, family and significant others — whereas he sees only an endorsement of traditional relationships defined by the institution of marriage.

In his mind, “the Sandra Bullock trade” isn’t some far-fetched hypothetical along the lines of “If you were stuck on a desert island, what’s the one thing you’d want to have with you?” He actually sees it as an either-or dilemma. Forget the possibility that one could forgo the professional success and also have a miserable marriage, or that giving up on your personal ambitions could actually harm your relationship. There is no room for such nuanced considerations when you live in a black-and-white world.

James has made a career of risky behavior — he called his reality show “Jesse James Is a Dead Man,” after all. He’s also flamed out two marriages already, including one to the colorful adult film star/convicted tax evader Janine Lindemulder.

Maybe that’s why he was drawn to McGee, with whom he has much in common, including an ugly divorce and a child custody battle. McGee’s case, however, stemmed from her ex-husband’s allegations of “stripping, pills, pornography” and not taking medication for her bipolar disorder.

We can perhaps understand, if not entirely excuse, a little weakness while one’s other half is out of town. But here’s what chafes about this idiot. He’s all, oooh, I’m such a badass! I’m a “speed junkie,” and I race airplanes and motorcycles! I used to be a bodyguard for Soundgarden! And then one crazy bitch sells him down the river for 30 G’s, and you know what he does? Issues an apology so tepid, so wussy, that somewhere David Letterman and Tiger Woods are rolling their eyes in disgust. “The vast majority of the allegations reported are untrue and unfounded. Beyond that, I will not dignify these private matters with any further public comment,” he told People magazine on Thursday. But he continued to comment, “There is only one person to blame for this whole situation, and that is me. It’s because of my poor judgment that I deserve everything bad that is coming my way. This has caused my wife and kids pain and embarrassment beyond comprehension and I am extremely saddened to have brought this on them. I am truly very sorry for the grief I have caused them. I hope one day they can find it in their hearts to forgive me.”

This whole situation? Poor judgment? What the hell? James certainly doesn’t owe the world a public walk of shame, nor does he need to elaborate on the exact nature of his relationship with Ms. Bombshell. But none of that makes his statement any less a piss-poor excuse for a mea culpa. Seeing how you’ve built your whole rep on being fearless, how about you nut up and stop tippy-toeing about your behavior, big boy?

One could make a compelling case for McGee, with her penchant for drama and TMI regarding her paramour’s prowess, as the crazy person of the week. One might even nominate Sandra Bullock, whose choice of husband seems the very essence of what single ladies like to refer to as “damaged goods.” But no, we’re going to have to hand it to the guy at the center of the storm, the one who sees a woman with “Pray for us sinners” tattooed on her face and doesn’t stop to think: This might not end well. We give this award to James not merely for his indiscretion; no, we give this award to James for his apparent inability to learn anything about spinning a personal disaster from his fellow philanderers (of which there have been many). He’s thereby guaranteed himself weeks more of bad publicity, relentless scrutiny and, no doubt, incredibly tacky revelations. That’s not just poor judgment, you hot dogging, thrill-seeking maniac, you – that’s just crazy. 

Consider: In addition to Bullock and Winslet, Jane Wyman, Reese Witherspoon, Halle Berry, Hilary Swank and Helen Hunt all got divorced within a couple years of winning Academy Awards — and Julia Roberts broke up with Benjamin Bratt not long after she did. (Also, although Sarah Jessica Parker and Matthew Broderick have been married for over a decade, and she’s never been nominated for an Oscar, LaPorte would like you to know that Broderick was “glumly trailing his wife” on the red carpet this year, as she “was fawned over by the paparazzi and fashion police.” Beverly Hills psychiatrist Carole Lieberman agrees that “He was looking miserable the whole time” and her success “may well doom that marriage.” So there’s that.) Since at least three of these break-ups famously involved the male partners cheating — and we all know that never happens unless a guy is feeling threatened by a woman’s success — what more evidence do we need that the fundamental problem in each relationship was men suffering “the ultimate castration”? (Aside from, you know, actual castration, which I imagine would feel somewhat more definitive to the man experiencing it.)

But just to be sure, maybe we should compare this data to what we know about Best Actor winners. Writes Jessica Grose at Double X, “The implicit (sexist) idea behind the ‘curse’ is that men are so uncomfortable with their wives and girlfriends’ mega-success, they are driven to cheat or flee.” She’s referring only to the first “curse” article, by the way; the Daily Beast piece makes that quite explicit. “But if you take one look at the list of best actor nominees and winners, you’ll see that their relationship track-records are not much better: 2008 winner Sean Penn’s relationship with Robin Wright broke up about seven times; when Russell Crowe won in 2000, he was busy breaking up Meg Ryan’s marriage to Dennis Quaid.”

Grose also mentions nominees George Clooney, Bill Murray and Mickey Rourke — but wait, there’s still a lot of ground left to cover just among Best Actor winners! For starters, let’s not forget Penn’s first win, in 2004 — Wright filed for divorce between the two and after the second. (Contrast this with Hilary Swank, whose marriage to Chad Lowe lasted six years after her first Best Actress Oscar, but who landed on the Daily Beast’s “ultimate castration” list because they divorced after her second. And that was the one she thanked him for!) Also, not long after Crowe won, Meg Ryan was busy breaking up with him. William Hurt and Marlee Matlin called it quits somewhere around the time of his win for “Kiss of the Spider Woman,” and Dustin Hoffman was both divorced and married in 1980, the same year he won for “Kramer vs. Kramer.” Because I have access to a top secret journalistic database known as “Wikipedia,” I can tell you that men who were divorced within two years of winning a Best Actor Oscar also include: Clark Gable, Jose Ferrer, Ernest Borgnine, Yul Brynner, Sidney Poitier, Lee Marvin, Rod Steiger, George C. Scott, Art Carney and Robert Duvall. If we expand our parameters to include divorces within six years of an Oscar — and if Swank counts, I don’t see why we shouldn’t — we can throw in Marlon Brando, and I think a couple more I didn’t write down. If I had the patience to dig into the romantic histories of Jack Nicholson, Al Pacino, Jamie Foxx, Adrien Brody, etc., the list might grow longer.

That’s fifteen confirmed Best Actor winners who were splitsville not too long after taking home their awards — one of them twice — versus eight Best Actress winners making LaPorte’s case for a curse. That is, in fact, double the break-ups attributed to Best Actress Oscars. So why aren’t we more worried about the poor men? Jeff Bridges may have been married to the same woman for over 30 years, but you’ll also note that he never won a Best Actor Oscar before this year. Given the bleak history associated with that award, who knows what could happen now? Poor Jeff Bridges.

On the other hand, despite the well-documented presence of a Best Actress curse, Helen Mirren’s been with Taylor Hackford since 1986 — even though she’s been nominated twice, won once, and racked up four Emmys along the way; Frances McDormand’s been married to the same guy since 1984, Jessica Lange since 1982; Susan Sarandon stayed with Tim Robbins for more than ten years after “Dead Man Walking”; and curse victims Helen Hunt and Julia Roberts have been hitched to new guys for most of the last decade — all indications that there are, in fact, men who do not view their partners’ possession of a gold statuette as symbolic castration! Hell, Marion Cotillard got married just before she won, even, and there’s so far no news of a split! So perhaps it’s possible that some of these women who won Oscars but lost loves were just, I don’t know, with the wrong people at the time? Kind of like all those men presumably were?

I mean, for all I know, maybe every last one of those guys really did flip out at such an unequivocal symbol of their wives’ success, scream, “Ow, my balls!” and hit the road. But given the number of Best Actress honorees whose marriages didn’t founder immediately after their wins, and the number of much less successful people who end relationships every day, I’d be wary of reading too much into it even then. Especially since such interpretations always seem to be framed as as cautionary tales for high-achieving women, rather than exhortations to men to suck it up and support their partners’ ambition. Do you see what happened to Sandy, gals? You’ve got to ask yourself: Do you want to be at the top of your field, or do you want to be loved? Put your career ahead of your man’s ego, and he’ll be banging a neo-Nazi tattoo model before you know it. Don’t say we didn’t warn you. (And psst, Sarah Jessica, we know you’ve worked really hard to earn so much attention, but oh my god, look behind you!)

When a supposed trend is used to send yet another message that women had best put relationships before careers — by the way, have you given any thought today to how many eggs you have left, missy? — I’m always skeptical. But this one is even more ridiculous than most. Grose already made the point a lot more efficiently than I have here: “Needless to say, the notion of a such a curse is a load of bull.”

Personal note: This will be my last post as a regular Broadsheet contributor. I’ll still be around doing occasional features, but I’m giving up the daily ladyblogging grind for the forseeable future so I’ll have more time to work on other projects. I have no doubt that some commenters will be busting out the champagne over that news, but to those of you who have been reading and sending positive feedback over the two years I’ve been here, thanks so much.

Representatives for James and Bullock did not respond to calls and e-mails seeking comment.

THIS IS A BREAKING NEWS UPDATE. Check back soon for further information. AP’s earlier story is below.

LOS ANGELES (AP) — Sandra Bullock canceled her appearance at the London premiere of “The Blind Side” days after Internet reports alleged she was having trouble in her marriage and that she had left the couple’s Southern California home.

Calls and e-mails to representatives for Bullock and her husband, celebrity motorcycle builder Jesse James, weren’t immediately answered.

People.com said Bullock had left the couple’s home just days before a report of infidelity by her husband surfaced.

The couple were last seen together publicly at the Oscars. While Bullock didn’t specifically thank James in her acceptance speech for best actress, they walked hand-in-hand on the red carpet, and he attended numerous award shows with her leading up to the Oscars.

The 45-year-old actress said Wednesday in a statement by Warner Bros. UK that she cannot attend next Tuesday’s premiere of “The Blind Side” for “unforeseen personal reasons.” She canceled her appearance almost two weeks after winning the Oscar for her performance in the movie.

Bullock went on to apologize for canceling her commitment and to thank people for their support of the film, which has made nearly $253 million domestically.

She and James were married in July 2005.

If Bullock and her husband have parted, it continues a long chain of broken relationships for best actress Academy Award winners.

Just in the past year, Susan Sarandon (winner in 1996) and Kate Winslet (2009) separated from their respective mates. Reese Witherspoon, Halle Berry and Julia Roberts are among the winners from the past decade who within a year of their victories had parted from their then-companions.

When Hilary Swank won in 2000 for “Boys Don’t Cry,” observers noted she did not mention her husband, Chad Lowe, in her acceptance speech, leading to rumors the couple were in trouble. Lowe was thanked first when Swank won again, in 2005, for “Million Dollar Baby.” By the end of 2006, they had divorced.

The 45-year-old actress said Wednesday in a statement by Warner Bros. UK that she cannot attend next Tuesday’s premiere of “The Blind Side” for “unforeseen personal reasons.” She canceled her appearance almost two weeks after winning the Oscar for her performance in the movie.

Bullock went on to apologize for canceling her commitment and to thank people for their support of the film, which has made nearly $253 million domestically.

She and James were married in July 2005.

If Bullock and her husband have parted, it continues a long chain of broken relationships for best actress Academy Award winners.

Just in the past year, Susan Sarandon (winner in 1996) and Kate Winslet (2009) separated from their respective mates. Reese Witherspoon, Halle Berry and Julia Roberts are among the winners from the past decade who within a year of their victories had parted from their then-companions.

When Hilary Swank won in 2000 for “Boys Don’t Cry,” observers noted she did not mention her husband, Chad Lowe, in her acceptance speech, leading to rumors the couple were in trouble. Lowe was thanked first when Swank won again, in 2005, for “Million Dollar Baby.” By the end of 2006, they had divorced.